Whenever I'm chewing on gum that has lost its flavor, I extract the gum from my mouth using my fingers before putting it back in so the flavor would return.

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After peeling an apple, I will put the apple in a zip-lock and hold it through the plastic so my hands won't get sticky while I eat it.

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Fantasize a situation that turns you into a person with superpowers or something.

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Eat the last bowl of ice cream. Then 6 hours later, you wish you hadn't. (sometimes even open the fridge and check whether you actually ate it or not)

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Sometimes when I'm watching a sitcom, I get distracted from the jokes because the characters are in a bedroom and I start focusing on the awesome stuff they have.

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Manage to be more AWESOME! THAN YOU IN EVERY SINGLE WAY! YES YOU! YOU DONT HIDE FROM ME! YEAH CHANGE THE PAGE LIKE THE PUSSY YOU ARE, COME OVER HERE INTO THE SCREEN (NOT HOME IM NAKED AND NOT IN THE MOOD FOR RAPING NOW SO YEAH ANYWAY) MORAL; THE ORIGINAL NOT THE CULT MORAL CODE FUCK ASSHOLE OKAY? DO I SEEM LIKE I WANT A CULT? OR THAT I JUST WANT TO CHAINSAW THE HEAD OF YOUR DOG AND PACK IT IN A NICE GIFT BOX FOR YOU? HUUUUUH!?

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Find that the kettle has recently been used and still contains hot water so decide to have a cup of tea just so that boiling that water wasn't a waste. Think that it might have cooled down by now. Reboil the water.

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I want to hire a private investigator to follow a private investigator who was hired to follow the first investigator.

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Drool a lil bit and continue eating...

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When calling someone you hang up after 3 or 4 rings because you're tired of waiting rather than it being time to leave a message.

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i pull for the chicken when peter and the chicken fight on family guy cause peter is a jackhole

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Listening to music walking through town and feeling like you're in a music video

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Look at my poo before I flush it.

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At any time of day, when i'm not busy, someone you know pops into your head and you start talking to them telepathically, but not for long, then you realise that youre just plain crazy? anyone?

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Hold my pen or pencil with two fingers cued against my palm and two fingers sliding up the pen with my thumb in between them.

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Whenever I get in the shower, no matter what, I always have to pee.

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Imagine punching someone you hate in the face, but when you see them in person you think "Oh s***!!!!" and hide.

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Boinked my neighbor

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Wondering how your funeral would play out if you die

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Think about my life as a book when I'm in public, for example "I then walked over to my friend to say hello to him."

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I have to make a breathing hole for fresh air to come in when I am laying under a hot blanket.

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when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

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I thought I was disgusting until I read the top voted things here. Floral: Actually pretty neat.

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Wipe my hands on a cold glass to clean my hands

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.