realize that no one is listening to me talk so I say something completely random to try and get there attention

I feel strange when I look at someone and think ''This person has had sex''

Sometimes when you're at work and you're REALLY horny, you look around at the women you work with and think who you really would like to bone, then on another particular day when you aren't horny, you see the same women and think to yourself " I must have REALLY been horny. What was I thinking?" lol (not trying to be gross, but honestly, who doesn't get horny while at work sometimes)

I'm in the middle of a good dream but I wake up and try to go back to sleep to finish it when it never happens.

Not likeing something someone posted because you have a secret crush on them and you don't want them to think you check there Facebook too much.

When bored in School, I like to imagine what I would do at that exact moment if a Zombie Apocalypse started.

Getting secretly pissed off when people don't like your birthday post on their Facebook wall.

Mayada stupid

Look at the least popular comments just out of interest

brush the dandruff from my eyebrows

Whenever I hear a baby or a young child scream very loud, I imagine that their head will explode.

I find it easiest to read or study while sitting on the toilet.

Whenever I hear someone say a word in a way that I like, I repeat it.

Try to do things while waiting for the microwave.

Sometimes I think of doing really bad things and smirk, only to later regret even thinking of it and start questioning myself while feeling bad about it.

When I'm walking on pavement or tiles I always make patterns, e.g stepping on every second tile, stepping a certain amount of times on each bit of pavement

1. When you're downstairs at night you go upstairs as fast as fucking possible. 2. When you switch volume in TV, the second number has to be 0 or 5.

put wood glue on my hand, blow it dry and peel it off to make fake skin

When I'm walking in the street and I hear a car coming from behind I try to beat it by running to the closest telephonepole.

Spend a ton of time on the way you look and the clothes you choose, then going out in public and imagining you're a celeb.

Think long and hard about something but then realise you don't care

Sometimes at a red light, I like to look at the person driving next to me and if they look towards me I quickly turn around and pretend I wasn't looking at them.

moving your hand with objects that are already moving and pretending you have the force.

sometimes i mouth improvised, ridiculous sentences in the mirror to see what i look like when i talk to people

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.