Boy:did it hurt? Me: Did what hurt? Boy:When you fell from heaven. Me: I came frome the pits of hell! Boy: Well then...O__O

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I have to make a breathing hole for fresh air to come in when I am laying under a hot blanket.

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Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk without insurance and crashing into legal citizens who pay taxes and insurance leaving us with a debt in medical bills so that we cant afford physical therapy.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Stare at something long enough thinking it will eventually move.

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don't wash my hands after using the toilet because its a waste of time

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I pee in the sink so i don't have to aim

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I use my magic powers to give shaddy politicians their comeuppance (I don't have any magic powers lol)

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Open the microwave door exactly when your food ends.

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when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

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Watch a familiar movie, and then freak out when you see a suspensful part, only to later realize that there was no point in getting worked up since you already know what happens.

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When at Burger King, McDonalds etc. I always finish the drink before the food so that I still have the taste of the food in my mouth when I'm finished.

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When no one is around, kick a push door open to feel like a badass.

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When alone and listening to music I pretend that I am the artist and dance around the room like its the music video or I am on stage.

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If I'm at work and have to poop, when I get in the stall I look under the opening at the bottom for any other feet in the other stalls to make sure I am alone. I always think what if when I do that someone else does it at the same time.

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Not likeing something someone posted because you have a secret crush on them and you don't want them to think you check there Facebook too much.

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when i wake up from a dream and it was an amazing dream. then i try to fall back asleep to have it again...it doesn't work

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Go to bed with my left nostril clogged, wake up with my right nostril clogged.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Fantasize about shooting one of those trucks that have some sort of liquid in them and watching them blow up.

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Do somthing only you do

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I would try to make my pencil shavings as long as possible.

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Try to make a turd that touches the bottom of the toilet before it breaks off.

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Sometimes when I'm excitedly hurrying out of the house, I skip for a brief moment.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.