Vigorously scratch my head over a black surface and watch the dandruff fall like snowflakes....then eat it.

I kill Solid Snake and masturbate when the Game over screen keeps screaming for my own "snake" "Snake answer me! Snake SNAAAKE!" Me: Answer coming right up and out any moment now! fapfapfap

Start walking down a busy street or mall, and realise I've gone the wrong way. Suddenly stop and pretend to read something on my phone for a few seconds before turning round and walking the right way.

WHEN I SHOW YOU A PICTURE ON MY PHONE..DON’T SWIPE LEFT.DON’T SWIPE RIGHT.JUST LOOK. Via: Collection of Love WhatsApp Status

Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk without insurance and crashing into legal citizens who pay taxes and insurance leaving us with a debt in medical bills so that we cant afford physical therapy.

I imagine myself having a superpower that could make people see from my point of view. I would just have to lay a hand on them, and suddenly they would understand who I really am.

make south park refferences every day

I have to sleep with my bottom lip stuck to the pillow or my hand so I can breathe.

Write a word then wonder if it's spelt with an i or and e so just put them both in but do it in such a way that the person reading it won't know whether you didn't know the spelling or misspelled it then realized your mistake and tried to fix it.

When im alone i rub myself in vasaline and pretend that im a slug on the kitchen floor.

Pretend you are turning Super Saiyan when sat on the toilet

(okay maybe not a thing I do but something I noticed) When people call themselves "Writers" In today's world you know that might not be the case because we have computers so shouldn't they be called typers?

Putting pressure on my closed eyes and seeing fireworks behind my eyelids

Feeling very uncomfortable for days, untill your motivation finally reaches that point when you start learning for the exam.

Sometimes when I'm bored I start shouting things in German.

if im somewhere and say i get a itchy ass,i would say to a friend whilst sctatching " i have the itchyist but whole in the world right now" jokingly. but then think to myself, i wonder if there is someone in the world right now at the same time as me who has actually got a itchyer butt lol

I like to watch lava lamps heat up

When you're walking along at night and you see the moon, then you move around quickly,still looking at it as if you're controlling it.

Going to the very last pages of "Things you think you only do" with the lowest ratings and realizing that they really are the only ones who do that stuff...

Go for a 10 mile run.

Say something in my head, but then wonder if i said it out loud and just didn't realize.

Get somewhat worried about myself if I'm thumbed down on THIS SITE.

Analyzing what could be wrong or false about your religion and God, then shooing the thoughts away in fear you won't get into Heaven.

Sometimes I'll think about something that's so weird nobody would ever do it, and then i figure there's a big chance somebody did it at least once in history.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.