I find that whenever I go somewhere it always seems to take longer than when I come back home

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I pee in the sink so i don't have to aim

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click your pen off of your desk and make it hop in the air

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Feeling very uncomfortable for days, untill your motivation finally reaches that point when you start learning for the exam.

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Imagine I'm walking in slow motion when I enter a bar or club

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Pretending you're a badass character from an anime or movie when listening to rock music (or something similar)

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when im lying in bed and fart i bring the blanket up to my nose and smell it. And nod in approval..

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You are thinking of really awkward moments that happened earlier in the day so then you subconsciously say a bunch of random things quickly out loud to get the thought of the awkward moment out of your head.

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Pretending to use the force while a door closes behind you, then thinking your brilliant :) -Tim.

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I love myself, my wife, the threesomes, and I STILL spend time with you! Moral: Which must mean YOURE WINNER! AND STUFF! Either that or you are a sad fuck, cant argue...

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Walking into a room to do something, and then forgetting what you were gonna do.

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When your watching a YouTube video and you have to watch an AD, you mute it and turn your head away because your just that pissed off at the company.

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eat the muffin bottom because it isn't as good as the top and i want to get it over with

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Analyzing what could be wrong or false about your religion and God, then shooing the thoughts away in fear you won't get into Heaven.

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I sleep naked cauz It's dead sexy.

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Being able to think about great ideas for the world, but not being able to get a math problem done.

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Make sudden movements in the mirror to try and catch out my reflection.

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sometimes i feel like the person i look at in the mirror is not my own reflection

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Do a little half laugh, then when someone looks at you, you realise that it wasn't even funny so you pretend to be clearing your throat.

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Air guitar to a song of how you think it would be on a Guitar Hero game.

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When alone and listening to music I pretend that I am the artist and dance around the room like its the music video or I am on stage.

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get really freaked out when your in a parking lot and the car next to you starts backing up and you think your moving forward.

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Sometimes after a long, hard day or when something bad happens I just sit down and cry in the shower.

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Say to yourself "I really should get that work done" then do nothing about it

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.