sometimes i mouth improvised, ridiculous sentences in the mirror to see what i look like when i talk to people

Wait until my significant other is in shower and then let loose the longest, loudest fart that's been building in me all night and pray it's muffled by the mattress and the covers.

I always try to play it cool and act like it’s no big deal. But I always have a mini anxiety attack before actually stepping onto a moving escalator. It is a task trying to time my step perfectly where my foot isn’t hanging off a step and I have to hurry my second foot on there isn’t an awdward space of steps between my feet. -Ikka

I used to peep when my relatives are watching porn, back when i was a kid. After that, i feel like i wanna pee.

I read the down voted posts

When texting someone on the toilet & they ask, "What are you doing?" I respond with, "Oh, just chillin." LOL. -Jade

I Think people can read my mind....."if you can read my mind nod your head or don't if you don't want me to know that you can" It doesn't work either way but yeah thats just me lol

The only time I seem to look at the clock is when the numbers read my birth date.

Reading all these posts and being reminded that we are all more similar to each other than we think, regardless of whatever group each of us may belong to.

Hoping if I fall asleep on the couch while my family is in the room I dont have a dream about sex and wake up moaning and groaning...

not eating the ends of a hotdog.

Drink alcohol out of styrofoam soda cups on the bus and train.

When I blow my nose I think I'm blowing my brains out and certain parts of things I learned at school are going into the tissue and will be forgotten forever.

Before I meet someone I've never met before, I think of stuff to say or do to prevent it from being awkward, but when I finally meet them I do none of the things I thought about doing.

Imagin what would happen if there was a zombie invasion just at your house.

I look at this site and wonder if the thumbs up are all from people who actually do the same thing, or just people who like that or think it's a funny thing to do.

I can't piss with my shoes on.

Boy:did it hurt? Me: Did what hurt? Boy:When you fell from heaven. Me: I came frome the pits of hell! Boy: Well then...O__O

Fire imaginary rocket launchers at passenger planes flying overhead, then panic thinking what if it really blows up?

Walk down the street, listening to a song, singing it softly, then thinking 'I might wanna stop doing that before I look awkward', but the wires get crossed and you start singing LOUDER and so on.

Avoid eating at parties to look as though you're not hungry

laugh whenever I see an infomercial where the hosts glorify their products to the point where it seems like they have found Jesus it is hilarious.

as you walk down the street, you pretend that all of the people were zombies and you pretend you have a gun and give them headshots (even imitate the gunshot with your mouth) -MATT

I like to watch lava lamps heat up

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.