Do a little half laugh, then when someone looks at you, you realise that it wasn't even funny so you pretend to be clearing your throat.

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I feel strange when I look at someone and think ''This person has had sex''

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When bored in School, I like to imagine what I would do at that exact moment if a Zombie Apocalypse started.

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I can understand (insert language) but for the life of me I can't speak it.

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try to get abs by doing the stupidest things

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Look at the least popular comments just out of interest

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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brush the dandruff from my eyebrows

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Sometimes I think of doing really bad things and smirk, only to later regret even thinking of it and start questioning myself while feeling bad about it.

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I don't like to meet people when I'm well dressed because that's not me all of the time.

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When I'm walking in the street and I hear a car coming from behind I try to beat it by running to the closest telephonepole.

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Guessing on those annoying Captcha things and then getting unnecessarily angry when it tells you you're wrong.

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Run the shower before you get in/ move out the way of the water to let it warm up first

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Help my dogs eat their dinner....I think the whole time, "If they only had thumbs".....

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when a sex scene comes on the tv i try make up an excuse to go somewhere like i need a drink or a pee.

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Log onto facebook, notice a family member is also logged on, and immediately log off before they trap you in a never-ending facebook chat.

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sometimes i mouth improvised, ridiculous sentences in the mirror to see what i look like when i talk to people

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When I'm in a car and I hear a song on the radio, I always imagine myself performing it perfectly in front of a crowd even though I know I'd never be able to do that. I've done this since I was very young and still do.

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When you're lying in bed and you fart, you pull the covers over your head to smell it.

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Sometimes I reflect on my life and just feel humiliated.

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When a passneger in the car, I sing songs in my head and hope the song is in time with the signs and streetlights as I drive past them.

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Touch something dirty with one hand then wash it but then wash the other hand cause it feels weird when it's not wet like your other hand.

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I eat something and read book/newspaper/magazine at the same time. Then i take food crumbs off the book and eat them too.

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Every time you use a vending machine you hope you get lucky and 2 things drop down.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.