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Start walking down a busy street or mall, and realise I've gone the wrong way. Suddenly stop and pretend to read something on my phone for a few seconds before turning round and walking the right way.
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-65
WHEN I SHOW YOU A PICTURE ON MY PHONE..DON’T SWIPE LEFT.DON’T SWIPE RIGHT.JUST LOOK. Via: Collection of Love WhatsApp Status
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-65
Pretend you are turning Super Saiyan when sat on the toilet
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-69
i answer "why" to questions and then when someone gets pissed i say "when" Hey Jim, how's Mary? Why? Because she's your sister and I care about you. Why? Because you're my best friend. Why? STOP IT! When?
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-71
I can't piss with my shoes on.
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-73
Sometimes when I'm bored I start shouting things in German.
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-77
filling your mouth with water in the shower and spitting it at the wall.
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-79
Imagine a little person trapped and about to be crushed in the progress bar.
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-83
Nodding while talking on the phone then remembering the person can't see you
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-87
Pretending to use the force while a door closes behind you, then thinking your brilliant :) -Tim.
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-89
When you're scared of the bathroom and you close your eyes you quickly look around to check if there's a monster or something in the mirror
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-91
if im somewhere and say i get a itchy ass,i would say to a friend whilst sctatching " i have the itchyist but whole in the world right now" jokingly. but then think to myself, i wonder if there is someone in the world right now at the same time as me who has actually got a itchyer butt lol
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-99
Use the massaging shower head on my anus to power blast the poop plaque away
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-109
I like to watch lava lamps heat up
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-123
When you're walking along at night and you see the moon, then you move around quickly,still looking at it as if you're controlling it.
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+58
Go for a 10 mile run.
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+42
Get somewhat worried about myself if I'm thumbed down on THIS SITE.
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+30
eat the muffin bottom because it isn't as good as the top and i want to get it over with
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+30
Chewing your chips softer so you can hear the tv
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+20
realize that no one is listening to me talk so I say something completely random to try and get there attention
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+16
When i am home alone i think there are hidden cameras in my house and wave at objects that might conceal the camers to scare the people looking through them
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+14
When no one is around, kick a push door open to feel like a badass.
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+12
Sniff or tap to a rhythm to some sort of beat I composed in my head...
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+10
I piss in the bed every night
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+8
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Things You Think Only You Do
A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.