wait til the last second to stop the microwave before it dings

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Look in the fridge 10 times without eating anything

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see a old couple in the street and think," i wonder if he still bangs her" lol

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Ur mum

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pretend your on the phone talking to someone to make you look like you not a loner

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I like to think I'm a Lion or cat.

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use the hair drier to dry my balls after shower

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When you walk across a cross walk and you stretch your steps so it takes one step for each line, yet you still try to look casual because ur in public

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get a really delicious smelling soap or candle and feel sad when you remember you can't eat it.

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When I'm listening to a sad song that relates to my life while I'm walking all alone, I mouth the words and pretend I'm in a music video.

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Use a signature that automatically gets me hundreds of red thumbs... Yeah that moral crap...

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sometimes when i see a cop cruising around i try and act suspicious to see if they pull me over.

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Watched the woman in black then go to bed then suddenly a woman in black comes in my room oh wait it is just my mum saying good night

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listening to music and not realizing ur favorite song is on until the last word

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When a tooth is very loose,i shake it with my tongue because that pain is relaxing.

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I use my magic powers to give shaddy politicians their comeuppance (I don't have any magic powers lol)

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taking a shit while brushing my teeth.

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dip my fries in ice cream! sometimes in soda. It's good!

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When your talking to a hot girl and then picture her naked with you in bed but then stop thinking about that because you think she can read your mind

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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I lay in bed at night with my eyes closed but not asleep,and my mind will tell me that thier is someone standing by my bed,i will think and say to myself,im not looking because thats ridiculous. Then after a 30 seconds pause,have a quick peep.

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I feel strange when I look at someone and think ''This person has had sex''

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When the good guy in a movie is in a bad situation, I imagine myself doing something different that seems more legit.

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Fantasize about shooting one of those trucks that have some sort of liquid in them and watching them blow up.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.