Sometimes I think of doing really bad things and smirk, only to later regret even thinking of it and start questioning myself while feeling bad about it.

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Laugh when something happens to someone, but when the exact same happens to you, you say "Its not funny"

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my solve media says spare is big but it was space is big

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I randomly hold my boobs in my room.

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I think some songs would be better if they didn't put a rap in with them

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1. When you're downstairs at night you go upstairs as fast as fucking possible. 2. When you switch volume in TV, the second number has to be 0 or 5.

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When I'm walking in the street and I hear a car coming from behind I try to beat it by running to the closest telephonepole.

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I stick used soap to a new soap so I don't waste it.

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Try to think of something nice then thinks of then scariest things.

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when you're fapping and thinking about someone, you either get a text from them moments later, or stop thinking about them because you feel like they are reading your mind.

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Set multiple alarms to wake me up in the morning so I dont just turn it off and fall back asleep

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when sleeping over at someone's house, make a cringing, weird looking face while opening the fridge in the middle of the night like somehow the look on your face will change the volume of the seal breaking open

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Leave those last one or two sheets of toilet paper after taking a crap just so you don't have to replace it.

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Covering the movement sensors with toilet paper on public toilets incase it's a secret camera.

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Wonder what random strangers look like or noises and such they make while having sex. Everyone literally. People you interact with at work , customers, your boss, the married couple. Except for people who are like dirty looking af. Our just straight up ugly. Then your like grossed out by those thoughts your having and start getting that home sickfeeling in your stomach. Almost like butterflies but like dead ones or something. Hard to explain.

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Accidently send an empty text or text multiple people and send wrong text to wrong person

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When I'm in a car and I hear a song on the radio, I always imagine myself performing it perfectly in front of a crowd even though I know I'd never be able to do that. I've done this since I was very young and still do.

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I try to sympathize when some celebrity butthole has problems but, I can't.

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I always have to remake my bed right before going to sleep in it

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I put toilet paper in first before i poop, so the water dosent splash me.

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I drive in the car then suddenly awake from a day dream and realize ive driven for the last 4 miles with no recollection of the journey.

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Have a sudden urge to say "bomb" at an airport.

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I can only play a piano with my right hand

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Change the channel when a Progressive commercial comes on because I can't STAND that stupid Flo girl.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.