I wake up right before the "sexy" part happens...

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I sometimes deliberately miss buses or trains even though I could easily board them.

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worry about getting a little butt sweat mark on a chair if you've been sitting in it too long while its hot.

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Be talking to someone about something random, then a few days later or so... something very relevant to that happens, then you think to yourself "I'm sure I can tell the future"... I'm very confident that, that is just me...

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eat the muffin bottom because it isn't as good as the top and i want to get it over with

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I sleep in my underpants every single night

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At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a harding and make people think it's that big all the time.

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Glance at your friend beside you, smile to yourself, and think, "I could murder them."

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I try to say something, but a bunch of people are talking at the same time so I yell at them to shut up and as soon as I say something I realize I was wrong so I say"okay" as calm as possible to keep from looking like a douche

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Do a little half laugh, then when someone looks at you, you realise that it wasn't even funny so you pretend to be clearing your throat.

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When no one is around, kick a push door open to feel like a badass.

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get really freaked out when your in a parking lot and the car next to you starts backing up and you think your moving forward.

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When you do something really cool but no one is there to see it and it's pointless to try and tell them about it because they don't believe you

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I worry because I keep wondering why I worry.

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Sometimes, when I'm at work, I j3rk 0ff in the bathroom. Please tell me someone else has done this????

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Sometimes I toot.

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Sometimes I think of doing really bad things and smirk, only to later regret even thinking of it and start questioning myself while feeling bad about it.

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I randomly hold my boobs in my room.

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Set multiple alarms to wake me up in the morning so I dont just turn it off and fall back asleep

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I try to sympathize when some celebrity butthole has problems but, I can't.

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When an ice cube fall on the floor I kick it under the fridge.

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Wonder what random strangers look like or noises and such they make while having sex. Everyone literally. People you interact with at work , customers, your boss, the married couple. Except for people who are like dirty looking af. Our just straight up ugly. Then your like grossed out by those thoughts your having and start getting that home sickfeeling in your stomach. Almost like butterflies but like dead ones or something. Hard to explain.

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wake up in the middle of the night and write your dream if you like it. Or just write all night and dont sleep all night for days at a time.

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Sometimes at a red light, I like to look at the person driving next to me and if they look towards me I quickly turn around and pretend I wasn't looking at them.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.