When a passneger in the car, I sing songs in my head and hope the song is in time with the signs and streetlights as I drive past them.

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Wait until my significant other is in shower and then let loose the longest, loudest fart that's been building in me all night and pray it's muffled by the mattress and the covers.

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Only taking half a biscuit because it makes you feel bad and then taking another half of a different biscuit.

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Whenever I watch TV, the volume has to be on multiples of 5. Even if the perfect volume is in between.

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When having a flog in the shower I keep checking the door to make sure noone walks in

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i fap in the bathroom because its the only room i have a reason to lock the door in.

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sitting in the passenger seat of the car, move my head around gently to guide a piece of dirt on the window in the foreground around the obstacle course of trees, streetlights etc in the background. Also, imagine my eyes are projecting lasers which cut through anything and carve the passing world up to my design.

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After watching a really good film that has a narrator, everything I do is narrated by that person in my head.

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I cant ride a bike

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You take showers on school morning because you like to stand there under the hot water just thinking about life while your warm

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I have won so many competitions online for things like being the 99, 999th visitor on the site

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Not vote up my own posts? I bet I'm among the few..

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see a old couple in the street and think," i wonder if he still bangs her" lol

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whenever someone pulls up beside you in another car, you are fully aware of them, but never look at them, your too cool to care what they look like.

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I lift my butt when I'm farting

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At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a hardon and make people think it's that big all time.

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Sometimes when I'm sitting still I visualize myself being able to move myself using my mind.

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test how many stares you can scale in one step

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i get an headache when i each cheese. but i don't get one when i have pizza or cheese and onion crisps

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I like to think I'm a Lion or cat.

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When im out with my dad in the car i swear traffic lights always seem to go to red when were coming

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I think something is gonna get me at night when I walk out of my brothers roomso I look behind me and run and usually bump into a wall

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Before I meet someone I've never met before, I think of stuff to say or do to prevent it from being awkward, but when I finally meet them I do none of the things I thought about doing.

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k. everyone

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.