I hum the MLP:FIM theme and hope no one recognizes the tune.

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Go for a 10 mile run.

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Sometimes when I go to a drive in restaurant, and get an order of fries, I empty the bag out, and there are a few fries in the bottom of the bag. I Enjoy those the most, as I feel they were free

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Get somewhat worried about myself if I'm thumbed down on THIS SITE.

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Analyzing what could be wrong or false about your religion and God, then shooing the thoughts away in fear you won't get into Heaven.

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Start the shower so no one hears you shit bricks

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Glance at your friend beside you, smile to yourself, and think, "I could murder them."

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You're taking a poo, and you're bored. You use your thighs as drums to pass the time.

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Hate when people ask "do you have a bathroom?" It's like "no we crap in the yard!"

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I wonder if sport games are rigged?

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Delete the whole password when I mess up only the one letter.

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When alone and listening to music I pretend that I am the artist and dance around the room like its the music video or I am on stage.

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When you think about your life then think your parents had to have sex to make you. Then start thinking about all the gross old teachers you've had that probably had sex. Then when you get older your parents tell you about all the times they had sex when you were in the house.

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Mayada stupid

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in burgers, you eat until you have only a few bites left, then you eat the bun and then the insides

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Complimenting a girl awkwardly,and then smiling stupidly later and thinking of alternate versions of the conversation that happened!!

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Sometimes I toot.

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Look at adigital clock sideways when in bed while tryingto sleep and try to make the numbers look like faces

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Lay between the wall and the bed when the bed is pefectly fine

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When I'm at home alone, I feel like people are watching me through my windows, so I act completely civil.

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Scratching with the wife's/girlfriends hair brush.

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How funny would it be if plants were trying to kill us but they move too slow to get us

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Try to think of something nice then thinks of then scariest things.

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I'm not bad looking and I don't fall into the beautiful category either but I really feel good about the way I look

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.