When im alone i rub myself in vasaline and pretend that im a slug on the kitchen floor.

(okay maybe not a thing I do but something I noticed) When people call themselves "Writers" In today's world you know that might not be the case because we have computers so shouldn't they be called typers?

Putting pressure on my closed eyes and seeing fireworks behind my eyelids

Sometimes when I'm bored I start shouting things in German.

if im somewhere and say i get a itchy ass,i would say to a friend whilst sctatching " i have the itchyist but whole in the world right now" jokingly. but then think to myself, i wonder if there is someone in the world right now at the same time as me who has actually got a itchyer butt lol

I like to watch lava lamps heat up

When you're walking along at night and you see the moon, then you move around quickly,still looking at it as if you're controlling it.

Go for a 10 mile run.

Going to the very last pages of "Things you think you only do" with the lowest ratings and realizing that they really are the only ones who do that stuff...

Get somewhat worried about myself if I'm thumbed down on THIS SITE.

When you are almost crying while laughing in a silent area, you have to think terrible thoughts just to get rid of the laughing.

Analyzing what could be wrong or false about your religion and God, then shooing the thoughts away in fear you won't get into Heaven.

Sometimes I'll think about something that's so weird nobody would ever do it, and then i figure there's a big chance somebody did it at least once in history.

Constantly refresh your email page even though you know nothing will appear.

I wonder if sport games are rigged?

When no one is around, kick a push door open to feel like a badass.

When I am in a bind and I know I need help I just say " I gott this" and things work out

I try to say something, but a bunch of people are talking at the same time so I yell at them to shut up and as soon as I say something I realize I was wrong so I say"okay" as calm as possible to keep from looking like a douche

Sniff or tap to a rhythm to some sort of beat I composed in my head...

Sometimes I have something I want to do and then walk into the room to do it in and forget exactly what I was trying to do, it usually involves the kitchen so I just look in the refrigerator then leave and then remember what it is I wanted to do.

I sometimes watch entire movies with the sound off and a good album playing.

whenever i'm holding a kitchen knife, i feel super weird like i'm gonna stab someone.... its not like i would ever do that, but i think about what would happen if i just impaled the person that is standing near me with a huge knife.

I feel strange when I look at someone and think ''This person has had sex''

Mayada stupid

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.