Try to think of something nice when then thinks I the scariest things

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I strum my fingers on my other hand between the fingers on the other hand which is a fist to make a popping sound (Try it, it's really fun)

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Somethings thinking: O God, I love this world.

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I can only brush my teeth at exactly 7:43 AM...Am I weird?

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I play out romantic scenarios with myself when I'm alone. We're talking full-blown just straight up talking out loud- to myself, of course. It's not that I'm lonely or anything since I did this when I had a boyfriend anyway (just to clarify, it didn't end because of this XD.) I really just feel like doing it because it's really friggin' entertaining. If you've never done it, well... it's basically like being in a really crappy, low budget soap opera, with a plot that doesn't make any damn sense, staring you as every character and the audience. That's basically the only way I could describe it lol.

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rub your face on your legs after shaving to feel how smooth they are.

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All of my friends go to halloween parties. I still go trick or treating.

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Sorry I posted last comment 3 times. And it is best ever not beat ever.

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Write a word then wonder if it's spelt with an i or and e so just put them both in but do it in such a way that the person reading it won't know whether you didn't know the spelling or misspelled it then realized your mistake and tried to fix it.

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i answer "why" to questions and then when someone gets pissed i say "when" Hey Jim, how's Mary? Why? Because she's your sister and I care about you. Why? Because you're my best friend. Why? STOP IT! When?

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Watch peoples body language and see if they're on the same pace of thought as i am and then try to speed up my thinking to pretend or act like I am realizing something they are not.

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When I am at amusement parks I look and determine which guys I could beat up and which I couldn't.

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check behind the shower curtain before taking a piss xD E E S

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Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk and uninsured and killing innocent legal people or injuring them for life and leaving them in medical debt.

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when walking i always count how many steps i have taken as i go

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Sometimes when I'm bored I start shouting things in German.

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I really hate the sound of sqeaking balloons

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Pretending to use the force while a door closes behind you, then thinking your brilliant :) -Tim.

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I use my magic powers to give shaddy politicians their comeuppance (I don't have any magic powers lol)

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Sitting on toilet after pooping without wiping for longer than a minute because your in your phone.

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I was the real Stig...

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When I get "interactive" commercials on my laptop screen, I like to "just shoot 4 out of 5 ducks" and feel like I have cheated the system.

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eat the muffin bottom because it isn't as good as the top and i want to get it over with

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Start the shower so no one hears you shit bricks

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.