Going through a lot of Deja Vu lately, it feels like you have another life before this one.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

After watching a really good film that has a narrator, everything I do is narrated by that person in my head.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

I sometimes wonder if the world is even real.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

recycle the peanuts in my poop to make organic peanut butter

thumb_up thumb_down -43

No ones home. Go to youtube and do karaoke. Can the neighbors here me? Guess im not talking to them ever again...

thumb_up thumb_down -43

When you had a crush on a girl in elementary school, then don't see her in middle school and think of how much of a bitch she was. Then You start crushing on her again in high school.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Whenever I accidentally drop a glass or cup it always bounces the first time but breaks the second

thumb_up thumb_down -53

getting really nervous about random white vans that drive by you.

thumb_up thumb_down -55

I talk through my teeth when i am talking to my pets.

thumb_up thumb_down -57

Wondering how your funeral would play out if you die

thumb_up thumb_down -57

When you walk across a cross walk and you stretch your steps so it takes one step for each line, yet you still try to look casual because ur in public

thumb_up thumb_down -57

I love the tingly feeling you get when youve shifted after realizing you arm, leg, hand, etc. has gone numb. am i the only one?

thumb_up thumb_down -57

I can only brush my teeth at exactly 7:43 AM...Am I weird?

thumb_up thumb_down -59

Get soo scared in the shower when your home alone that you are scared to open the curtain just incase somebody is out tthere

thumb_up thumb_down -59

Write angry notes into your search browser in case any Russian spies are watching.

thumb_up thumb_down -59

I TALK WITH PEDOBEAR ABOUT OUR BUSINESS ;)

thumb_up thumb_down -61

Vigorously scratch my head over a black surface and watch the dandruff fall like snowflakes....then eat it.

thumb_up thumb_down -61

WHEN I SHOW YOU A PICTURE ON MY PHONE..DON’T SWIPE LEFT.DON’T SWIPE RIGHT.JUST LOOK. Via: Collection of Love WhatsApp Status

thumb_up thumb_down -65

Start walking down a busy street or mall, and realise I've gone the wrong way. Suddenly stop and pretend to read something on my phone for a few seconds before turning round and walking the right way.

thumb_up thumb_down -65

I have to sleep with my bottom lip stuck to the pillow or my hand so I can breathe.

thumb_up thumb_down -67

I imagine myself having a superpower that could make people see from my point of view. I would just have to lay a hand on them, and suddenly they would understand who I really am.

thumb_up thumb_down -67

Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk without insurance and crashing into legal citizens who pay taxes and insurance leaving us with a debt in medical bills so that we cant afford physical therapy.

thumb_up thumb_down -67

make south park refferences every day

thumb_up thumb_down -67

When im alone i rub myself in vasaline and pretend that im a slug on the kitchen floor.

thumb_up thumb_down -69

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.