Without thinking i ask questions i know the answer to

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Try to think of something nice then thinks of then scariest things.

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In the shower i let water run down my hands so it looks like i'm shooting water out of my fingers.

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Watch 30 seconds of a commercial break only to realize it's dvr'd and I could be fast forwarding it.

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Wake up after a dream. About a day later you think about if it was real or not.

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When i was little i used to see people's cars shaking and wondered why they were listening to a song that just goes "BOOM BOOM BOOM"

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Wait until my significant other is in shower and then let loose the longest, loudest fart that's been building in me all night and pray it's muffled by the mattress and the covers.

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Justin Beiber is a woman

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When I meet someone random, and have a small conversation, and then when they leave, I feel sad because I think I am never going to see them again.

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Tally mark everytime I take a shit.

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When ever i hear music that i like i imagine im in a fight and i know martial arts with people i dont know

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I flush the toilet if the water's green and I'm going to have a poo, so it doesn't splash me.

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Unable to be near my cat without petting her or talking to her.

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When I find a new song I like, I listen to it over and over and over; >>Until I run that sh*t into the ground.

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When I'm walking and I step on a crack with my left food, the next time I step on a crack it has to be my right foot and vise versa. I can't step on a crack twice in a row with the same foot. But I don't have to step on every crack.

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I'm a guy and I like to wear swimwear as underwear

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Hide important things in places at home but forget later where you hid them.

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see a old couple in the street and think," i wonder if he still bangs her" lol

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Say the Lord's name in vain, then say "sorry God" under my breath right after.

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Blow into the shower head when I'm taking a shower to make what sounds like jet noises

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test how many stares you can scale in one step

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when im in the toilet and invent something in my mind and dont have a pen and paper to wright my invention and when im done i forget about it...

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Drive slow in straightaways and fast through curves, especially sharp ones.

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I HATE minecraft gift codes and the morons who post about them. I wish those morons would get off my planet.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.