I kill Solid Snake and masturbate when the Game over screen keeps screaming for my own "snake" "Snake answer me! Snake SNAAAKE!" Me: Answer coming right up and out any moment now! fapfapfap

When I'm listening to a sad song that relates to my life while I'm walking all alone, I mouth the words and pretend I'm in a music video.

read on youtube comments with too unlikes

Flush the toilet before you finish peeing

Start walking down a busy street or mall, and realise I've gone the wrong way. Suddenly stop and pretend to read something on my phone for a few seconds before turning round and walking the right way.

i answer "why" to questions and then when someone gets pissed i say "when" Hey Jim, how's Mary? Why? Because she's your sister and I care about you. Why? Because you're my best friend. Why? STOP IT! When?

Write a word then wonder if it's spelt with an i or and e so just put them both in but do it in such a way that the person reading it won't know whether you didn't know the spelling or misspelled it then realized your mistake and tried to fix it.

I have just one thing to say to all the women who look at me as a sex object. Hey.

Go to fart while you have the flu, only to find out it wasn't a fart at all....

Pretending to use the force while a door closes behind you, then thinking your brilliant :) -Tim.

Sometimes I walk around town and watch peoples TVs through their windows. When they see me and confront me, I try to get a conversation about the show going.

see if I can hold my breath when walking down a long hallway

Get somewhat worried about myself if I'm thumbed down on THIS SITE.

Constantly hearing your name in public and asking "did you just hear my name?"

Make sudden movements in the mirror to try and catch out my reflection.

When I am in a bind and I know I need help I just say " I gott this" and things work out

You're taking a poo, and you're bored. You use your thighs as drums to pass the time.

When I Download A Song Or Movie And The Download Speed Slows Down I Think The FBI Is Tracking Me.

try to make myself sneeze because I like the feeling I get when I do

like it when you fart because it scratches your butt when its itchy

Thinking that out there, on this earth in a lost city, there is an awesome clone of you.

I hit the frig after sex

hover over public toilets and end up leaving a sprinkling of pee that lands uniformly all over on the seat then use a big wad of TP and my foot to wipe down the seat.

When ever I'm walking up or down stairs, i always have to step on the last step with my left foot.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.