When you're in a public place, make up conversations between strangers. Example: Man to wife: Let's get out of here. There's no place to sit. Wife to man: Honey, we just got here. Man to wife: Maybe you didn't understand, Martha. There's no place to sit.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

When I see someone with similar hair to mine, I stare at them from behind and try to figure out if that's what I look like from the back.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

When I am driving and I see another car being pulled over I think "Oh, so I am not the only one"

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Manage to be more AWESOME! THAN YOU IN EVERY SINGLE WAY! YES YOU! YOU DONT HIDE FROM ME! YEAH CHANGE THE PAGE LIKE THE PUSSY YOU ARE, COME OVER HERE INTO THE SCREEN (NOT HOME IM NAKED AND NOT IN THE MOOD FOR RAPING NOW SO YEAH ANYWAY) MORAL; THE ORIGINAL NOT THE CULT MORAL CODE FUCK ASSHOLE OKAY? DO I SEEM LIKE I WANT A CULT? OR THAT I JUST WANT TO CHAINSAW THE HEAD OF YOUR DOG AND PACK IT IN A NICE GIFT BOX FOR YOU? HUUUUUH!?

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Eat the last bowl of ice cream. Then 6 hours later, you wish you hadn't. (sometimes even open the fridge and check whether you actually ate it or not)

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Listening to music walking through town and feeling like you're in a music video

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Count how many steps there are in a stairwell I use often and then try to take it by same number each time... Eg if there are 16 then always go by twos and missing the others!?!?!?

thumb_up thumb_down -32

When a book is boring, i will think of my favouite song and then i will start singing the book, like i will look at the words and ligit, start singing them in my favourite tune~im so weird

thumb_up thumb_down -34

i pull for the chicken when peter and the chicken fight on family guy cause peter is a jackhole

thumb_up thumb_down -34

only read the short jokes on this website

thumb_up thumb_down -34

You tell your friends that you hate the Rick roll'd song even though you secretly like it.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Wonder who decide what news stories we see and don't see?

thumb_up thumb_down -40

I have shown up for a first date in a friends POS car instead of my own to see if she is too materialistic

thumb_up thumb_down -42

I say that girl's name I have a crush on right before I go to sleep because I want her to be the last thing I think about, and then wake up realizing that it was super creepy... Only to do it again the next night

thumb_up thumb_down -42

jump down the stairs when im almost down to save time

thumb_up thumb_down -44

after taking a dump i always still smell a little bit of poop and i wonder if other people smell it too

thumb_up thumb_down -44

No ones home. Go to youtube and do karaoke. Can the neighbors here me? Guess im not talking to them ever again...

thumb_up thumb_down -46

Ur mum

thumb_up thumb_down -46

get a really delicious smelling soap or candle and feel sad when you remember you can't eat it.

thumb_up thumb_down -48

Thinking about life as if its just a dream and wondeing if one day your just going to wake up and be like " wtf just happend".....

thumb_up thumb_down -50

Drive slow in straightaways and fast through curves, especially sharp ones.

thumb_up thumb_down -52

Cheak the fridge every 5 minuets waiting for food to just "magicly" appear

thumb_up thumb_down -54

everytime i see a jet stream in the air i pretend that i can shoot a missile with my finger tip that is self guided and tracks down the airplane that made that certain jet stream.

thumb_up thumb_down -54

Write angry notes into your search browser in case any Russian spies are watching.

thumb_up thumb_down -56

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.