hover over public toilets and end up leaving a sprinkling of pee that lands uniformly all over on the seat then use a big wad of TP and my foot to wipe down the seat.

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When bored in School, I like to imagine what I would do at that exact moment if a Zombie Apocalypse started.

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Think that some minutes feel shorter than others

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always get sports injuries, never get any attention from them

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in burgers, you eat until you have only a few bites left, then you eat the bun and then the insides

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I love touching, squeezing and occasionally biting my dog's (read: any dog's) muzzle. I love the texture and the gummy-ness. I also love how pissed he gets when I do it and sneezes after.

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brush the dandruff from my eyebrows

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I don't like to meet people when I'm well dressed because that's not me all of the time.

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Cough, whistle or hum while on the toilet for a time, just so anyone outside the door doesn't think I'm mastrubating.

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Sometimes, when I'm at work, I j3rk 0ff in the bathroom. Please tell me someone else has done this????

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Seeing an acquaintance who you would feel awkward talking to in a public place, knowing they see you as well, and pretending not to see them, while hoping they pretend not to see you as well.

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Sometimes, I wonder why god or the big bang ever existed in the first place and why there is a universe in the first place ... And it makes my brain hurt!

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Tip my couch over to dig for something I have lost and then end up finding a bunch of random crap.

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I think some songs would be better if they didn't put a rap in with them

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Right after moving to a new place I check my room for hidden cameras.

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Sometimes I think that if we play with dolls, maybe we're just dolls that someone is playing with and creating lives for.

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play Simpsons episodes in my head...way too often

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wake up in the middle of the night and write your dream if you like it. Or just write all night and dont sleep all night for days at a time.

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Sometimes while texting or messaging, I enact the physical gestures that accompany what I'm saying as if it were an in-person conversation, even though no one can see me.

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i leave tv on when i sleep...cant close it cause i hate to hear....noices...in my bedroom that cant identify......

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Spend a ton of time on the way you look and the clothes you choose, then going out in public and imagining you're a celeb.

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while I am sitting on the toilet I play with it and waste the toilet paper and of course i just keep flushing it

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How funny would it be if plants were trying to kill us but they move too slow to get us

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pee when you are dreaming haha lol

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.