You think someone is reading your mind and hurriedly change what your thinking to something normal

wait til the last second to stop the microwave before it dings

I go to the fridge, see that there is nothing I want to eat in it, and then go back to it a minute later hoping that something I like has materialized

If I'm in the car looking for an address or a street name I'll turn down the radio. Why?

(1) In the middle of a conversation, I start to think of all the crazy stuff I could do even though I would never want to i.e. punching them in the face, making out with them, flashing them.

I sometimes chew on the inside of my cheek

No ones home. Go to youtube and do karaoke. Can the neighbors here me? Guess im not talking to them ever again...

Ur mum

I am 23 and I know how to spell "STORK"

when im in the toilet and invent something in my mind and dont have a pen and paper to wright my invention and when im done i forget about it...

When I'm watching a movie I have already seen I hope for a different ending but soon realize it won't happen

Thinking about life as if its just a dream and wondeing if one day your just going to wake up and be like " wtf just happend".....

When im home alone, i watch porn with the volume turned up really loud.

I think something is gonna get me at night when I walk out of my brothers roomso I look behind me and run and usually bump into a wall

Count the number of times someone knocks on a door on television.

sometimes *sigh* sometimes I-I-I-I feel like the third or fourth most useless invention! Moral: BUAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA!

I like to think I'm a Lion or cat.

send a text to some one and act like you "meant" to send it to someone else.

Being stuck in a traffic jam and wishing I could just apparate

I TALK WITH PEDOBEAR ABOUT OUR BUSINESS ;)

Write angry notes into your search browser in case any Russian spies are watching.

When I'm watching something interesting on TV, sometimes i realize they I'm making a weird face so i make sure that i make my face go back to its normal position. This way, my face won't get stuck like that

Whenever I'm outside playing a sport or something I pretend I have a tv show and I'm giving the audience a tutorial on how to do whatever I'm doing.

I wake up right before the "sexy" part happens...

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.