Fire imaginary rocket launchers at passenger planes flying overhead, then panic thinking what if it really blows up?

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check behind the shower curtain before taking a piss xD E E S

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that time where you open the fridge door and stare at it for like 10 min then close it and walk away?

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Trying to do things before the microwave beeps .

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as you walk down the street, you pretend that all of the people were zombies and you pretend you have a gun and give them headshots (even imitate the gunshot with your mouth) -MATT

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Use the massaging shower head on my anus to power blast the poop plaque away

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Run faster down hotel corridors.

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When posting these, I'm rarely able to read the words/letters in the box that prove you're human and not some computer virus. Now I'm starting to think I'm not a human......

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When I hear footsteps approaching while I'm sitting on the toilet, I'm getting ready to jump at the door in case I actually forgot to lock it.

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You're taking a poo, and you're bored. You use your thighs as drums to pass the time.

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When i am home alone i think there are hidden cameras in my house and wave at objects that might conceal the camers to scare the people looking through them

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If I'm at work and have to poop, when I get in the stall I look under the opening at the bottom for any other feet in the other stalls to make sure I am alone. I always think what if when I do that someone else does it at the same time.

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Hate people who don't dress like you because they're not fashionable. Hate people who do dress like you because they threaten your individuality.

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Sometimes when you're at work and you're REALLY horny, you look around at the women you work with and think who you really would like to bone, then on another particular day when you aren't horny, you see the same women and think to yourself " I must have REALLY been horny. What was I thinking?" lol (not trying to be gross, but honestly, who doesn't get horny while at work sometimes)

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Run into a wall and say "I'm sorry" and then realize that it's just a wall.

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When watching TV shows, I always think about what I would have done differently if I was the character in that particular situation.

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TV turned on just so... Makes you not feeling alone or because some other unknown (or) irrational reason.And of course, feeling guilty cause you spending energy and money but still... Most of the time you just don't care.

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Poking my self under the covers just to not falleth asleepeth (t -_-)zzzzzz

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i leave tv on when i sleep...cant close it cause i hate to hear....noices...in my bedroom that cant identify......

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I don't know about anyone else but I really felt bad when the Lich killed Prismo in Adventure Time

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Dutch oven myself when I'm lying in bed trying to sleep

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Tear up when I poop

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Toss something across the room toward the place it belongs, get excited when it lands upright/ perfectly in place, then immediately regret you weren't recording it.

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I stick used soap to a new soap so I don't waste it.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.