Think that the person driving keeps staring at me when ever they look in the mirror and I'm sat in the back.

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Sometimes when you're at work and you're REALLY horny, you look around at the women you work with and think who you really would like to bone, then on another particular day when you aren't horny, you see the same women and think to yourself " I must have REALLY been horny. What was I thinking?" lol (not trying to be gross, but honestly, who doesn't get horny while at work sometimes)

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I chew my ice cream.

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i feel all weird and sad when i thing about my old belongings.

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I'm in the middle of a good dream but I wake up and try to go back to sleep to finish it when it never happens.

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I can understand (insert language) but for the life of me I can't speak it.

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when i wake up from a dream and it was an amazing dream. then i try to fall back asleep to have it again...it doesn't work

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When standing in long lines (stores, banks etc..) I think about how other people would react if I puked all over the place with no warning.

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Complimenting a girl awkwardly,and then smiling stupidly later and thinking of alternate versions of the conversation that happened!!

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When you think about your life then think your parents had to have sex to make you. Then start thinking about all the gross old teachers you've had that probably had sex. Then when you get older your parents tell you about all the times they had sex when you were in the house.

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Try stick to something but fail in the end

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Look at adigital clock sideways when in bed while tryingto sleep and try to make the numbers look like faces

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I am a masculine guy but in private I listen to very sensitive songs. ie: careless wispers

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I think some songs would be better if they didn't put a rap in with them

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You always go to the corner of the shower when the cold water is running.

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If I have to get up early the following day I will surprisingly wake up early even without an alarm

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Help my dogs eat their dinner....I think the whole time, "If they only had thumbs".....

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Sometimes, I wonder why god or the big bang ever existed in the first place and why there is a universe in the first place ... And it makes my brain hurt!

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Guessing on those annoying Captcha things and then getting unnecessarily angry when it tells you you're wrong.

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Toss something across the room toward the place it belongs, get excited when it lands upright/ perfectly in place, then immediately regret you weren't recording it.

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When I'm walking in the street and I hear a car coming from behind I try to beat it by running to the closest telephonepole.

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When I look at a clear blue sky, I'm convinced that I see little tiny floaty things, and think that I'm seeing air molecules.

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When I'm laying in bed in the dark and I close my eyes for a while then when I open them again I quickly scan for a light source just to make sure I can still see.

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When I wake up after having a good dream I try to remember it but I don't

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.