When you do something really cool but no one is there to see it and it's pointless to try and tell them about it because they don't believe you

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I would try to make my pencil shavings as long as possible.

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brush the dandruff from my eyebrows

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If I have to get up early the following day I will surprisingly wake up early even without an alarm

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I pretend I'm a really popular YouTuber and talk to nobody thinking they're my subscribers.

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I have an imaginary therapist. I talk to him in my head and he actually gives me really good answers.

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Thinking ambient thoughts while fondling myself into a semi hard-on.

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Dutch oven myself when I'm lying in bed trying to sleep

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put wood glue on my hand, blow it dry and peel it off to make fake skin

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wipe your armpit and then sniff it to see how bad you smell

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Leave those last one or two sheets of toilet paper after taking a crap just so you don't have to replace it.

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after dialing a number and clicking "call" constanly rehearse what your going to say when the other person picks up the line

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Try to think of something nice then thinks of then scariest things.

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In the shower i let water run down my hands so it looks like i'm shooting water out of my fingers.

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when i have a head or toothache...i hit it harder thinking it will stop or get better

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When I'm laying in bed in the dark and I close my eyes for a while then when I open them again I quickly scan for a light source just to make sure I can still see.

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When I dont feel like sweeping I sweep the stuff under the fridge or something

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like it when you fart because it scratches your butt when its itchy

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Whe someone buys you a gift and you think they have installed a camera into it or can somehow mentally see you when that gift is near you. Resulting in you acting strange around that it or when you are present in the same room as that gift

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make sure you hit every crack in the sidewalk evenly. slowly over time, you discover that you found an awkward walking pace to match the obsession.

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I thought the 2013 film Frozen could have gone longer

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fart and then breathe it in really quick hoping no one else smells it first

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shit corn, even though i havent recently eaten corn.

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After masterbating, I wonder if my dead relatives can just see what I did?

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.