I think my friends are dumb! I love them so much!!

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I hate it when people assume I'm smart just because I don't speak much and I wear glasses.

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When someone enters the room while i'm playing a game, start playing the best song of the game soundtrack so they notice it and think the game has a cool soundtrack.

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Pretending I'm on my cellphone in public.

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I like to go out without shoes on hot days and play the floor is lava

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Use the massaging shower head on my anus to power blast the poop plaque away

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Always have your feet under the cover, and if not, you think that something will get you.

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Be talking to someone about something random, then a few days later or so... something very relevant to that happens, then you think to yourself "I'm sure I can tell the future"... I'm very confident that, that is just me...

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check to see if post has any likes right after posting it. then have second thoughts about it.

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Being able to think about great ideas for the world, but not being able to get a math problem done.

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Wondering if your life is a TV show, and people are watching what you do.

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I feel strange when I look at someone and think ''This person has had sex''

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Sometimes when you're at work and you're REALLY horny, you look around at the women you work with and think who you really would like to bone, then on another particular day when you aren't horny, you see the same women and think to yourself " I must have REALLY been horny. What was I thinking?" lol (not trying to be gross, but honestly, who doesn't get horny while at work sometimes)

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I can't step on the cracks of sidewalks.

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When I'm home alone, I start hearing random noises and think someone is breaking in.

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Love the natural smell of my dog's paws.

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browse the internet at school and look at shit brix and the dog with the jesus butthole appears and the teacher saw and said what are you looking at? i was banned for the rest of the term. jesse footter

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When it's as quiet as possible in the classroom in the middle of the period and everyone is silently doing their work.... I suddenly think of something REALLY funny and spend the next half hour awkwardly grinning trying my hardest not to burst out uncontrollably.

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Sometimes I think of doing really bad things and smirk, only to later regret even thinking of it and start questioning myself while feeling bad about it.

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brush the dandruff from my eyebrows

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Feeling sorry for inanimate objects

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While trying to sleep I obsess over the little red LED on the TV set which I can't even see unless I lift my head from the pillow.

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Sometimes when I'm excitedly hurrying out of the house, I skip for a brief moment.

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Sometimes, when I'm at work, I j3rk 0ff in the bathroom. Please tell me someone else has done this????

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.