Thinking, "What is wrong with this generation"

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Love the natural smell of my dog's paws.

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Sometimes when you're at work and you're REALLY horny, you look around at the women you work with and think who you really would like to bone, then on another particular day when you aren't horny, you see the same women and think to yourself " I must have REALLY been horny. What was I thinking?" lol (not trying to be gross, but honestly, who doesn't get horny while at work sometimes)

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I chew my ice cream.

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Stab myself on a daily basis

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I don't care about who a celebrity dates or marries. Why should I?

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hover over public toilets and end up leaving a sprinkling of pee that lands uniformly all over on the seat then use a big wad of TP and my foot to wipe down the seat.

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Tryng to run away from, or at least be faster than my shadow.

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Look at the least popular comments just out of interest

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When it's as quiet as possible in the classroom in the middle of the period and everyone is silently doing their work.... I suddenly think of something REALLY funny and spend the next half hour awkwardly grinning trying my hardest not to burst out uncontrollably.

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I always think I have special powers

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Drink out the carton (your whole family prob does it)

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Laugh when something happens to someone, but when the exact same happens to you, you say "Its not funny"

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Try to do things while waiting for the microwave.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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I worry because I keep wondering why I worry.

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I'm a guy and I like to wear swimwear as underwear

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after dialing a number and clicking "call" constanly rehearse what your going to say when the other person picks up the line

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Criticize a porn novel for its poor use of the English language

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I feel that getting a 98 on a test is better than getting a 99.

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I stick used soap to a new soap so I don't waste it.

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Set multiple alarms to wake me up in the morning so I dont just turn it off and fall back asleep

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When I fart in public, I always pretend that nothing ever happened.

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Imagine I'm being filmed in a reality TV show just so I could do something productive or interesting.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.