Find a really good joke on the internet and pretend you came up with it to make your friends think you're funny

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Intentionally utilize uncommon vocabulary to replace colloquial slang for the pure purpose of entertainment (for oneself). :D

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When you are almost crying while laughing in a silent area, you have to think terrible thoughts just to get rid of the laughing.

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Make sudden movements in the mirror to try and catch out my reflection.

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Being able to think about great ideas for the world, but not being able to get a math problem done.

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Constantly refresh your email page even though you know nothing will appear.

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Chewing your chips softer so you can hear the tv

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I take a poop and then stand up to pee because I'm a man

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When the T.V switches to commercial sometimes I forget what I was watching Noel

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try to make myself sneeze because I like the feeling I get when I do

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When you see someone you know in a shopping centre and you pretend that you didnt see them at all because you cant be bothered striking up a conversation.

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I piss in the bed every night

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Feeling stupid when you're watching a funny movie and you laugh by yourself. So you look around and stop laughing.

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Getting over excited when you hear a song you like on the radio, even though you have it on your Ipod and can listen to it whenever you want.

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When I am bored and home alone, I sometimes try to recreate the most annoying sound in the world from Dumb and Dumber. (P.S. Sorry if this was already submitted, I didn't see it.)

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When bored in School, I like to imagine what I would do at that exact moment if a Zombie Apocalypse started.

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browse the internet at school and look at shit brix and the dog with the jesus butthole appears and the teacher saw and said what are you looking at? i was banned for the rest of the term. jesse footter

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When I'm making a weird face, I remind my self to stop before it gets stuck like that.

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I love touching, squeezing and occasionally biting my dog's (read: any dog's) muzzle. I love the texture and the gummy-ness. I also love how pissed he gets when I do it and sneezes after.

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Trying to figure out what form of suicide would hurt the least.

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Waiting alone inside a public toilet for someone to come in and open the door.... so you don't have to touch the handle!

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Blink and pretend that you just took a picture with your eyes.

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when you've done everything you wanted to do on the internet and stop and just stare at the screen.

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When I'm in the car I imagine I'm Superman flying along next to the car, whipping under, over and around traffic signs, trees, and fences. Sometimes I then fly up above the traffic a little. Then I get worried I will cause a traffic accident because people will be watching me instead of the road. I've done this since I was a kid. I'm 45 now and I still do it! Sometimes I'm Spider-Man, swing and jumping from truck to truck, car to car to keep moving fast along the highway. And lately, sometimes I do the Superman flying thing, but as Iron Man.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.