There's this reassuring voice in my head. She's almost like a mother, telling me that it'll be alright and that I have things to do.

When I wake up after having a good dream I try to remember it but I don't

When i get a back shiver. That's when i know something bad going to happen.

I put the volume on my television so it is on any number divisible by five (5-10-15 etc. etc.)

Justin Beiber is a woman

I still hum songs that I made up when I was a little kid

When I look at a clear blue sky, I'm convinced that I see little tiny floaty things, and think that I'm seeing air molecules.

I thought the 2013 film Frozen could have gone longer

Not eat French fries because I don't like the taste rather than because they are unhealthy?

When in a public toilet, I never leave the cubicle until everyone is either out of the room or in their own cubicle.

Manage to be more AWESOME! THAN YOU IN EVERY SINGLE WAY! YES YOU! YOU DONT HIDE FROM ME! YEAH CHANGE THE PAGE LIKE THE PUSSY YOU ARE, COME OVER HERE INTO THE SCREEN (NOT HOME IM NAKED AND NOT IN THE MOOD FOR RAPING NOW SO YEAH ANYWAY) MORAL; THE ORIGINAL NOT THE CULT MORAL CODE FUCK ASSHOLE OKAY? DO I SEEM LIKE I WANT A CULT? OR THAT I JUST WANT TO CHAINSAW THE HEAD OF YOUR DOG AND PACK IT IN A NICE GIFT BOX FOR YOU? HUUUUUH!?

When you're lying in bed and you fart, you pull the covers over your head to smell it.

I spin around in a spot, and then close my eyes and tilt my head up and to the opposite side i'm spinning to. It just feels awesome and it's even better while listening to music.

When having a flog in the shower I keep checking the door to make sure noone walks in

after seeing toy story, and watching that toys moved and talked to each other when the humans werent around, thinking that toys are really like that when you gone, and when you go back to you room, the toys rush back into their spots.

when i talk to someone, and the one where i am talking with is saying a sentence very fast, am going to repeat the whole sentence in my head and then it sounds really weird.

only read the short jokes on this website

when your doing something or going somewhere you think didn't I already do this, like your back in time.

Try to figure out if some of the posts were written by the same person.

Instead of reading the sunday comics, I read the nutrition facts on the cereal box.

I often try to visualise and merge my faces with various girls i could potentially fall for, just to assess how our future children would look like.

judge a spider on it's ability to hide from me and decide to let it survive if I consider it a clever hiding place, then get paranoid because the spider was smart.

turn off the tv by accident and then turn it on only to find that it takes forever to work again

I sometimes wonder if the world is even real.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.