When you're lying in bed and you fart, you pull the covers over your head to smell it.

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I read the down voted posts

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I put the volume on my television so it is on any number divisible by five (5-10-15 etc. etc.)

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When people are walking behind me I automatically think they are staring at my ass and get self-conscious.

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When you're in a public place, make up conversations between strangers. Example: Man to wife: Let's get out of here. There's no place to sit. Wife to man: Honey, we just got here. Man to wife: Maybe you didn't understand, Martha. There's no place to sit.

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Every time you use a vending machine you hope you get lucky and 2 things drop down.

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The power to put a pointless super power on thingsyouthinkonlyyoudo.com

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You feel compelled to stab someone in the face... But you don't since you know its wrong. Instead you play violent video games to get it off your mind.

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I throw a piece of paper in the toilet and try to "sink it" either with my "super stream wave" and if it does not work, I unleash my secret (but not always available weapon) "dept charge bombs".

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walking up steps in the dark and you think you've gotten to the top but there's actually one more step and you panic because you think your going to fall

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I used to think that if the earth was completely smoothed flat and you had a really powerful telescope if you looked through it you would see yourself looking through the telescope.

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Stand on the first floor and look up through the 2nd story railing just to look up women's skirts.

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Drink alcohol out of styrofoam soda cups on the bus and train.

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Wonder who decide what news stories we see and don't see?

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When I walking the same direction as other people, I secretly race them and do the sports commentry in my head

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has a plastic bag full of plastic bags in your house

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When you had a crush on a girl in elementary school, then don't see her in middle school and think of how much of a bitch she was. Then You start crushing on her again in high school.

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When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

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Masturbate. Sometimes two or three times a day.

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Try to think of something nice when then thinks I the scariest things

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I strum my fingers on my other hand between the fingers on the other hand which is a fist to make a popping sound (Try it, it's really fun)

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when you pick up something you think is going to be heavy and its like you suddenly have super strength

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Leftovers are better than the actual meal ;)

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poke fun at somebody and pray for forgiveness the following night

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.