Trying to do things before the microwave beeps .

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Use the massaging shower head on my anus to power blast the poop plaque away

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When your watching a YouTube video and you have to watch an AD, you mute it and turn your head away because your just that pissed off at the company.

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Say something in my head, but then wonder if i said it out loud and just didn't realize.

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Still sitting on the toilet 20 minutes after you're done crapping... you're not alone.. -Professor.

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Analyzing what could be wrong or false about your religion and God, then shooing the thoughts away in fear you won't get into Heaven.

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While at the movies, grab and eat your popcorn with your tongue and pretend you are a lizard.

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Sometimes I'll think about something that's so weird nobody would ever do it, and then i figure there's a big chance somebody did it at least once in history.

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dip my fries in ice cream! sometimes in soda. It's good!

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Being able to think about great ideas for the world, but not being able to get a math problem done.

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Sitting down on the toitlet to pee (being a male). It's so comfortable when you're tired. Also: Wonder if there's a female version of this, where girls stand up to take a piss. Just curiosity.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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When you cringe as you walk out of a store because you're paranoid the door will beep...

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I wonder if sport games are rigged?

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log out of any social network sites so that when im on a website it doesnt somehow send messages to my profile

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When I am bored and home alone, I sometimes try to recreate the most annoying sound in the world from Dumb and Dumber. (P.S. Sorry if this was already submitted, I didn't see it.)

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When at Burger King, McDonalds etc. I always finish the drink before the food so that I still have the taste of the food in my mouth when I'm finished.

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When I can't find my phone so I panic and shearch everywhere only to find out it was in my pocket.

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I sometime's wonder if other people can see and feel everything I can but are just in my body too judge me.

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Sing along to the radio in the car then stop at a red light when you realize other people can see you more easily.

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I worry because I keep wondering why I worry.

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Trying to figure out what form of suicide would hurt the least.

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When I'm in the car I imagine I'm Superman flying along next to the car, whipping under, over and around traffic signs, trees, and fences. Sometimes I then fly up above the traffic a little. Then I get worried I will cause a traffic accident because people will be watching me instead of the road. I've done this since I was a kid. I'm 45 now and I still do it! Sometimes I'm Spider-Man, swing and jumping from truck to truck, car to car to keep moving fast along the highway. And lately, sometimes I do the Superman flying thing, but as Iron Man.

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I see something glittery, someone tells me not to pick it up because I'll glitter all over myself, I pick it up anyway and glitter all over myself.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.