- Things You Think Only You Do

Sometimes, when I'm at work, I j3rk 0ff in the bathroom. Please tell me someone else has done this????

Do somthing only you do

When I get in the car I look in the backseat for monsters or psychopathic killers and as I am turning to check I say out loud 'Oh, maybe my book is in the backseat, let me check' so the monster or killer doesn't know I'm really looking back there for them. That way they might not kill me.

Sometimes when I'm excitedly hurrying out of the house, I skip for a brief moment.

Toss something across the room toward the place it belongs, get excited when it lands upright/ perfectly in place, then immediately regret you weren't recording it.

Sometimes, I wonder why god or the big bang ever existed in the first place and why there is a universe in the first place ... And it makes my brain hurt!

I randomly hold my boobs in my room.

Lay between the wall and the bed when the bed is pefectly fine

Imagining how it would feel to switch bodies with your crush

When in a outhouse I get scared that I can't unlock the door. This one time in the winter the lock froze and I was almost stuck

Wake up after a dream. About a day later you think about if it was real or not.

Leave those last one or two sheets of toilet paper after taking a crap just so you don't have to replace it.

I stick used soap to a new soap so I don't waste it.

Wonder what random strangers look like or noises and such they make while having sex. Everyone literally. People you interact with at work , customers, your boss, the married couple. Except for people who are like dirty looking af. Our just straight up ugly. Then your like grossed out by those thoughts your having and start getting that home sickfeeling in your stomach. Almost like butterflies but like dead ones or something. Hard to explain.

Keep things on my body equal. ex. Hold something in my right hand so I hold something equally heavy in my left hand.

get some of the lyrics to a song wrong. you know theyre wrong, but continue to sing the wrong words anyway, because the real words just don't seem to fit.

When there are multiple puddles on the sidewalk you try and jump in every single one of them

I asked telemarketers for their home number so I can call them at home and disturb THEM while they're relaxing with THEIR family

Imagine your in action movies and die for a girl while your lying there trying too sleep and realising you are deep in thought about something that your too chicken to do.

When ever i hear music that i like i imagine im in a fight and i know martial arts with people i dont know

After masterbating, I wonder if my dead relatives can just see what I did?

For some reason some guy at the office started calling me "Biggus Dickus" and that became my nickname from there on... ...Cant help but smirk whenever my female employees gather and ask one another "But what is that Biggus Dickus guys real name? Is he really "Biggus Dickus? Such a strange name, should we call him Biggus Dickus or? etc" Nero the clit collector: AND THEY WONDER WHY I REFUSE TO TELL THEM MY REAL NAME XD They even have bets to see which one can guess "Biggus Dickus`s" real name... ...WHAT? YOU COLLECT STAMPS! THATS TWICE AS CRUEL... Besides you got like ten, I got about 300.005.

When you're in a public place, make up conversations between strangers. Example: Man to wife: Let's get out of here. There's no place to sit. Wife to man: Honey, we just got here. Man to wife: Maybe you didn't understand, Martha. There's no place to sit.

Whenever I watch TV, the volume has to be on multiples of 5. Even if the perfect volume is in between.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.