- Things You Think Only You Do

while you put your t-shirt on, you get frightened that someone's watching you behind your shirt so you try to put it on as soon as possible.

Vigorously scratch my head over a black surface and watch the dandruff fall like snowflakes....then eat it.

Check every spoon fork and knife in the silverware drawer for spots or old food before you choose which one to eat with

Sitting down in the shower

So has anyone else ever been in the middle of doing something and at the exact moment something happens and you sort of wonder if it happened because of what you did.

when i listen to music in my earphones, i always pretend its me performing the song to an audience.

after i take a poop i stand up turn around and piss on my poop to try to split it in half

Everytime aplane is flying low you think it's going to crash right in front of your eyes

I like asking my wife how her SIMIANS are doing (the sims 4) because its fun watching her try to hide the fact that it annoys her. Nero, now if you thought Moral Man the Friendly neighbourhood r*pist was bad... Well, thumb me down I dare you! Seriously I totally did not have a certain bitch turkish hacker put a tracker on my laptop si I can find out where you live... And pay some guy to break your kneecaps... I only done it twice though... Here on horsehead network :) Third time is a charm ;) NERO: Actually I paid people five times, the fourth did not do his job, so I pay a fifth to FINISH HIM! (Sometimes I think people on craigslist just like to kill for the fun of it, seriously, eighty bucks?)

Love to check my astrological compatibility with my favorite musicians.

Whenever you shave, you make sure you cut both ends of your moustache, leaving a small patch in the middle above your lips. Then you pretend to be Hitler ;)

Slowly close the fridge door to see when the light bulb turns off.

When you're walking along at night and you see the moon, then you move around quickly,still looking at it as if you're controlling it.

Playing a sad song that talks about your current situation and then looking in the mirror or out the window pretending you are in a sad music video.

Say something in my head, but then wonder if i said it out loud and just didn't realize.

Feel bad about hurting someone a long time ago, when I was a child, and wish I could speak to that person and say "I'm sorry." Cringe whenever the thought of the incident rises.

Sometimes I feel that my reflection in the mirror will stop doing what I'm doing and either jump out and grab me, start telling me about her reflected life, or give me a mission to free her from her mirror life.

check to see if post has any likes right after posting it. then have second thoughts about it.

When you are almost crying while laughing in a silent area, you have to think terrible thoughts just to get rid of the laughing.

Start the shower so no one hears you shit bricks

I wonder what it wonder be like to have a really tall girlfriend?

sometimes i feel like the person i look at in the mirror is not my own reflection

Wipe the salt off your hand on your right pant leg after eating salty fries from fast food restaurants.

right after I turn the shower off I jump up and down to get rid of the extra water all over me...

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.