Something that bothers me is when a movie sequel comes out and for whatever reason the same things from the first movie happens so they just end up making the same movie

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Count the number of times someone knocks on a door on television.

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When im home alone, i watch porn with the volume turned up really loud.

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when im in the toilet and invent something in my mind and dont have a pen and paper to wright my invention and when im done i forget about it...

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carry my cat by holding it's front and back legs

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Use the letters on my phone to make words to help me remember important numbers

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I have memorized my drivers license registration number

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Use an entirely different vocabulary in your head than everyday life.

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When well dressed, someone ask me what I do for a living, I say nothing and watch the confused look come over their face.

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Wipe a soda can after somebody else in my family drinks out of it just in case I get sick or I may feel there spit.

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So has anyone else ever been in the middle of doing something and at the exact moment something happens and you sort of wonder if it happened because of what you did.

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sometimes when i wipe my nose a booger will get on my hand then ill get to lazy to get it off and wipe it under my chair.

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When I see a pregnant woman I can't help but think "she had sex"

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I imagine myself having a superpower that could make people see from my point of view. I would just have to lay a hand on them, and suddenly they would understand who I really am.

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When you're walking and think of something funny and start laughing, but you don't want people to think you're weird, so you pull out your phone and pretend you're texting.

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I have to sleep with my bottom lip stuck to the pillow or my hand so I can breathe.

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Left alone Big noise, people aren't expected back as soon so grab baseball bat and charge only to find them back early...."what you doing?" "batting my socks around practising my baseball skills"

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Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk and uninsured and killing innocent legal people or injuring them for life and leaving them in medical debt.

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only drink milk from a freshly opened carton

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Go through a bunch of the boxes with the messed up letters (The ones making sure your not a robot) trying to find one you like. Then, click the refresh button and realize that the last one might have been the best one you were going to get.

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I Never read the Terms of Service but click the box anyway .

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Everytime aplane is flying low you think it's going to crash right in front of your eyes

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Watch peoples body language and see if they're on the same pace of thought as i am and then try to speed up my thinking to pretend or act like I am realizing something they are not.

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Sometimes I wonder why I smell even though I remember putting DO on. I become embarrassed because there is a girl next to me. I hope she cannot smell it. Finally I realize its not me. It's her.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.