Avoid eating at parties to look as though you're not hungry

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When a tooth is very loose,i shake it with my tongue because that pain is relaxing.

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I have a phobia of incest

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I sometimes look at a guy and wonder how big their dick is.

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If someone high fives me on one hand, I need to high five the other one too, or I feel uneven.

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I sit up all night on the computer/xbox then when people ask if i have slept i just lie and say yes to avoid the drama.

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Sing every word to Bohemian Rhapsody every time you hear it in the most dramatic way possible.

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Tells a joke only you thought was funny and still laughs then laughs harder because your the only one laughing nikki

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I take a poop and then stand up to pee because I'm a man

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Not likeing something someone posted because you have a secret crush on them and you don't want them to think you check there Facebook too much.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <<

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I take a dump and then look to see how big it is.

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I can understand (insert language) but for the life of me I can't speak it.

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Scratching with the wife's/girlfriends hair brush.

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When i talk i say i like how or i hate that.

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sometimes when i'm talking to myself and someone walks in the room i have to make them believe what i'm saying is a song!!

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Sometimes I turn on my bedroom fan at night just so i can use heavier blankets.

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When I was a kid and I misbehaved when my dad used to smack me I would put emphasis in my cries to let him think that I got the lesson.

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I still hum songs that I made up when I was a little kid

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I used to peep when my relatives are watching porn, back when i was a kid. After that, i feel like i wanna pee.

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i have conversations in my head about showing someone some music and end up playing specific parts of various songs on my ipod and memorise the timings just in case it does happen

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I always feel chinese accents are unintelligent.

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Bored. Open refrigerator. Nothing to eat. Open it again five minutes later.

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Whenever I accidentally drop a glass or cup it always bounces the first time but breaks the second

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.