- Things You Think Only You Do

When at a restaurant you practice your order inside your head, then when you actually have to order you mess it up.

If I'm walking with or behind someone I always match their footsteps

I often try to visualise and merge my faces with various girls i could potentially fall for, just to assess how our future children would look like.

When masturbating at night, looking at the window paranoid that someone is watching. But stopping or moving out of view.

have you ever thought of a relative when masturbating?

I have shown up for a first date in a friends POS car instead of my own to see if she is too materialistic

I say that girl's name I have a crush on right before I go to sleep because I want her to be the last thing I think about, and then wake up realizing that it was super creepy... Only to do it again the next night

When I'm riding passenger in a car, things I'm driving past will be a part of my imaginary drum kit. When a car passes in the opposite direction, I'll tap my right foot as the bass drum, a drain hole along the gutter is my left hand snare, and the street signs and lights are the hi-hats in my right hand.

I keep on trying to imagine how long eternity is for when I go to Heaven. It never ends...

walking up steps in the dark and you think you've gotten to the top but there's actually one more step and you panic because you think your going to fall

forget to breathe while listening to ear buds too loudly.

jump down the stairs when im almost down to save time

Sneeze for a few minutes when I've eaten too much.

I am 23 and I know how to spell "STORK"

Think what would I be doing if I was someone else

Cringe when remembering something weird about you that happened years ago

expecting to get on this website to find something funny but instead finding crappy posts.

Try to move your head to line up specks on the windshield with objects outside.

Masturbate. Sometimes two or three times a day.

whenever I use a public stall I pretend Im not there to avoid unwanted attention

Think of all the perverted and disgusting things that I'd like to do to the women at work then feel bad for being a vile and disgusting person, then kind of feel turned on anyway lol.

Drive slow in straightaways and fast through curves, especially sharp ones.

I say a word and it feels like it didnt roll off of my tongue right, so I keep mouthing the word and saying it quietly to myself or in my head. Then end up saying it loudly in affirmation, possibly more than once.

getting furius wen ppl hav bad speling n grammer

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.