Chew as quietly as possible when eating cookies but as loud as possible when eating fruit.

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Being able to think about great ideas for the world, but not being able to get a math problem done.

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Realized with 7 billion people, there is a chance that someone else on earth is doing exactly the same thing as me at any given time.

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have fake conversations that might happen in the future...so ur prepared

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I try to say something, but a bunch of people are talking at the same time so I yell at them to shut up and as soon as I say something I realize I was wrong so I say"okay" as calm as possible to keep from looking like a douche

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I piss in the bed every night

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Do a little half laugh, then when someone looks at you, you realise that it wasn't even funny so you pretend to be clearing your throat.

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whenever i'm holding a kitchen knife, i feel super weird like i'm gonna stab someone.... its not like i would ever do that, but i think about what would happen if i just impaled the person that is standing near me with a huge knife.

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I put a cigarette lighter in a fireplace, anyone else?

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When you see someone you know in a shopping centre and you pretend that you didnt see them at all because you cant be bothered striking up a conversation.

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I never take drinks into smelly places, out of fear that the smell will somehow get into my drink and contaminate the taste.

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When I'm making a weird face, I remind my self to stop before it gets stuck like that.

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I know how to Gleek on command. (Don't know what it is just look it up.)

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When you think about your life then think your parents had to have sex to make you. Then start thinking about all the gross old teachers you've had that probably had sex. Then when you get older your parents tell you about all the times they had sex when you were in the house.

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Pretend to listen to music, but just do it so nobody talks to me or i simply just ignore them.

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not be afraid of hurricane sandy

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Sing along to the radio in the car then stop at a red light when you realize other people can see you more easily.

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When you have a stuffy nose, and you put tissue in one nostril so you can breathe.

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A lot of times I believe things I see or things that happen are "signs" of something.

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I have an imaginary therapist. I talk to him in my head and he actually gives me really good answers.

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Whenever I hear a baby or a young child scream very loud, I imagine that their head will explode.

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Sleep with pillow between legs

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Listening to a song, thinking about having the life of the singer in the band

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Drink out the carton (your whole family prob does it)

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.