Ask me if an outfit makes you look fat? I'll say VERY!

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Courtesy flush.

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When I'm watching a movie I have already seen I hope for a different ending but soon realize it won't happen

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Pretend like i'm having a conversation with someone talking to somebody on a phone, and randomly say something to go with what the person says.

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Hate when I can't sleep and the sun starts to come up and I hear birds chirping and i get worried and just realize that I should be happy that it's a new day and to relax.

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You feel like someone can read your mind so you try not to think about stupid stuff.

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I have memorized my drivers license registration number

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Picking my nose.

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I Masturbate Daily.

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I rehearse arguments in my head.

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I love to garden and I love flowers. I refuse to have a window box because I don't want those creepy Sesame Street twiddlebugs to live that close to my house.

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HEY! YOU! Yeah you! I can speak you only, NO! Nobody else here! Yeah you only you, by the way you are a dirty piece of s**t you mothe* F**ker! YEAH ITS YOU! I HATE YOU! EVERYBODY HATES YOU YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU! *end of special message just for you*

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Sitting down in the shower

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Turn volume down on iPod or tv, then turn up one bar to make it seem like it's still loud.

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i masturbate with my feet

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eat curry and don't complain about its spiciness ...if you're not white

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Whenever I'm outside playing a sport or something I pretend I have a tv show and I'm giving the audience a tutorial on how to do whatever I'm doing.

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When I post a picture on a Horsehead Huffer site that I made on Microsoft Paint, and it ends up being one of those that never load, I go back on Paint and save it again. Then I repost it, and it works.

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I TALK WITH PEDOBEAR ABOUT OUR BUSINESS ;)

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When I am bored I look at things and wonder about the people who made them, and at what time they were made, etc. Like whether my Bic pen was made in the morning or the night. Savy.

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I play out romantic scenarios with myself when I'm alone. We're talking full-blown just straight up talking out loud- to myself, of course. It's not that I'm lonely or anything since I did this when I had a boyfriend anyway (just to clarify, it didn't end because of this XD.) I really just feel like doing it because it's really friggin' entertaining. If you've never done it, well... it's basically like being in a really crappy, low budget soap opera, with a plot that doesn't make any damn sense, staring you as every character and the audience. That's basically the only way I could describe it lol.

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Thinking your life is a movie...

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only drink milk from a freshly opened carton

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I used to shower with my cat which struggles like hell, even though it loves getting fucking filthy, one day it even bit my dick. I still shower with my cat.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.