Point your finger to the sky when your favorite song comes on in the club or the radio

When at a restaurant you practice your order inside your head, then when you actually have to order you mess it up.

i pull for the chicken when peter and the chicken fight on family guy cause peter is a jackhole

If my SOLVE media is too long I refresh it to give me a shorter one

You think someone is reading your mind and hurriedly change what your thinking to something normal

see a old couple in the street and think," i wonder if he still bangs her" lol

Eat everything inside my burgers first then i eat the buns.

turn off the tv by accident and then turn it on only to find that it takes forever to work again

Smoking in the shower.

When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

I keep on trying to imagine how long eternity is for when I go to Heaven. It never ends...

Imagine your in action movies and die for a girl while your lying there trying too sleep and realising you are deep in thought about something that your too chicken to do.

Lay between the wall and the bed when the bed is pefectly fine

forget to breathe while listening to ear buds too loudly.

I go to the fridge, see that there is nothing I want to eat in it, and then go back to it a minute later hoping that something I like has materialized

If people knew what I am really thinking about while they are talking to me... YIKES!

I have tried jumping in an airplane to see if I fall in the same spot

jump down the stairs when im almost down to save time

Think what would I be doing if I was someone else

Sneeze for a few minutes when I've eaten too much.

get a really delicious smelling soap or candle and feel sad when you remember you can't eat it.

Ur mum

Masturbate. Sometimes two or three times a day.

Think of all the perverted and disgusting things that I'd like to do to the women at work then feel bad for being a vile and disgusting person, then kind of feel turned on anyway lol.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.