turn the cover of a magazine around because i have a weird paranoia that the government slipped in tiny cameras on the eyes of the person in the cover.

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When two people in my house are arguing, I stay in my room to avoid awkwardly interrupting them and being dragged into it.

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Thinking ambient thoughts while fondling myself into a semi hard-on.

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cover myself in vaseline and roll around on the floor pretending im a slug

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I like to watch people and imagine different stories that could explain why they're doing whatever it is that their doing.

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Guessing on those annoying Captcha things and then getting unnecessarily angry when it tells you you're wrong.

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Spend a ton of time on the way you look and the clothes you choose, then going out in public and imagining you're a celeb.

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Without thinking i ask questions i know the answer to

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Whe someone buys you a gift and you think they have installed a camera into it or can somehow mentally see you when that gift is near you. Resulting in you acting strange around that it or when you are present in the same room as that gift

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Whenever someone enters a pin number I always try to see how many number I can remember

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Wanting to change your name to Peter Jankins

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Mares really turn me on, so I download "bad stuff" Ironically though, I worked at a farm last summer and realized there is nothing more disgusting than reality. Still mares turn me on... If on video.

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Opening the fridge door, then trying to accomplish pouring a drink, before the door seals itself forever leaving the cola to the mercy of the outside world.

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In the shower i let water run down my hands so it looks like i'm shooting water out of my fingers.

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When I see a post on this site with a single downvote I start to feel guilty and give the person an upvote because I feel sorry for them.

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When alone at home turn on all the lights before it gets darker.

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sometimes I can be really tired but when I go to bed I lie there for hours awake

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When there are multiple puddles on the sidewalk you try and jump in every single one of them

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get some of the lyrics to a song wrong. you know theyre wrong, but continue to sing the wrong words anyway, because the real words just don't seem to fit.

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Sometimes hold a piece of chocolate between your fingers until it melts then lick the yummy gooeyness off your fingers

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Sometimes I look at security cameras and start to act suspiciously like I'm up to something... but really... I'm not.

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Sometime when I'm alone, I like to fill my bathtub with marinara sauce and pretend I'm a meatball.

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Right before I go to the dentist I brush my teeth.

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When i get a back shiver. That's when i know something bad going to happen.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.