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Get turned on when you see a girl yawn

I throw a piece of paper in the toilet and try to "sink it" either with my "super stream wave" and if it does not work, I unleash my secret (but not always available weapon) "dept charge bombs".

Bored. Open refrigerator. Nothing to eat. Open it again five minutes later.

I hid money in a jar behind a brick in the house I lived in and forgot about it. I've since moved to another state but I didn't remember I left the cash behind until years later.

Have one of those days where you think it is just a dream but then reality takes over

Going to sleep during class thinking that you've written down all your notes, until you wake up and realize you did nothing.

feel like im being watched turn my head sideways and see someone suddenly look away.

I say that girl's name I have a crush on right before I go to sleep because I want her to be the last thing I think about, and then wake up realizing that it was super creepy... Only to do it again the next night

When in class , I move alot in my chair when my butt itches .

whenever I use a public stall I pretend Im not there to avoid unwanted attention

When you walk across a cross walk and you stretch your steps so it takes one step for each line, yet you still try to look casual because ur in public

Somethings thinking: O God, I love this world.

When im home alone, i watch porn with the volume turned up really loud.

Pretend like i'm having a conversation with someone talking to somebody on a phone, and randomly say something to go with what the person says.

when you wake up in the morning to a text and you read it with one eye open

Being stuck in a traffic jam and wishing I could just apparate

Thinking about a situation someone else in the world might be in. For example, Someone dying and the pain they must be going through.

I imagine myself having a superpower that could make people see from my point of view. I would just have to lay a hand on them, and suddenly they would understand who I really am.

When I post a picture on a Horsehead Huffer site that I made on Microsoft Paint, and it ends up being one of those that never load, I go back on Paint and save it again. Then I repost it, and it works.

i answer "why" to questions and then when someone gets pissed i say "when" Hey Jim, how's Mary? Why? Because she's your sister and I care about you. Why? Because you're my best friend. Why? STOP IT! When?

Reading your facebook posts that you wrote a year ago or more, and think of how stupid you were at that time.

I can't piss with my shoes on.

I hate it when people assume I'm smart just because I don't speak much and I wear glasses.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.