Point your finger to the sky when your favorite song comes on in the club or the radio

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When at a restaurant you practice your order inside your head, then when you actually have to order you mess it up.

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i pull for the chicken when peter and the chicken fight on family guy cause peter is a jackhole

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If my SOLVE media is too long I refresh it to give me a shorter one

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You think someone is reading your mind and hurriedly change what your thinking to something normal

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see a old couple in the street and think," i wonder if he still bangs her" lol

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Eat everything inside my burgers first then i eat the buns.

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turn off the tv by accident and then turn it on only to find that it takes forever to work again

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Smoking in the shower.

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When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

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I keep on trying to imagine how long eternity is for when I go to Heaven. It never ends...

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Imagine your in action movies and die for a girl while your lying there trying too sleep and realising you are deep in thought about something that your too chicken to do.

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Lay between the wall and the bed when the bed is pefectly fine

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forget to breathe while listening to ear buds too loudly.

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I go to the fridge, see that there is nothing I want to eat in it, and then go back to it a minute later hoping that something I like has materialized

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If people knew what I am really thinking about while they are talking to me... YIKES!

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I have tried jumping in an airplane to see if I fall in the same spot

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jump down the stairs when im almost down to save time

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Think what would I be doing if I was someone else

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Sneeze for a few minutes when I've eaten too much.

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get a really delicious smelling soap or candle and feel sad when you remember you can't eat it.

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Ur mum

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Masturbate. Sometimes two or three times a day.

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Think of all the perverted and disgusting things that I'd like to do to the women at work then feel bad for being a vile and disgusting person, then kind of feel turned on anyway lol.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.