Waiting with a friend the microwave countdown finish and when comes to 0 shout "Happy New Year!" and we hug each other

I often try to visualise and merge my faces with various girls i could potentially fall for, just to assess how our future children would look like.

I throw a piece of paper in the toilet and try to "sink it" either with my "super stream wave" and if it does not work, I unleash my secret (but not always available weapon) "dept charge bombs".

I think Frozen is an overrated film

Looking at something suggestive on your computer and worrying that someone else in your family can see what you're doing on their computer.

I say that girl's name I have a crush on right before I go to sleep because I want her to be the last thing I think about, and then wake up realizing that it was super creepy... Only to do it again the next night

While playing a video game, narrate it explicitly in your head, e.i., stringing together absurd amounts of obscenities and scream them telepathically at your foes.

Realizing that I can just yell out the word "Fuck!" and no one can stop me.

(1) In the middle of a conversation, I start to think of all the crazy stuff I could do even though I would never want to i.e. punching them in the face, making out with them, flashing them.

I go to the fridge, see that there is nothing I want to eat in it, and then go back to it a minute later hoping that something I like has materialized

I get really annoyed by the constant audience laughter in some tv shows even when nothing funny is said

Sometimes I think my shit smells delicious... and I cant believe I am actually not only typing it here, but "finally" admitting it to myself.

Try to move your head to line up specks on the windshield with objects outside.

When I see lost posters of native parrots I always wonder how could I find 1 in a million

expecting to get on this website to find something funny but instead finding crappy posts.

Ask me if an outfit makes you look fat? I'll say VERY!

whenever I use a public stall I pretend Im not there to avoid unwanted attention

not eating the ends of a hotdog.

When im home alone, i watch porn with the volume turned up really loud.

Show all your friends this website to prove your not as strange as they think you are.

fap

everytime i see a jet stream in the air i pretend that i can shoot a missile with my finger tip that is self guided and tracks down the airplane that made that certain jet stream.

Pretend you and your classmates are in a Hunger Games scenario.

You feel like someone can read your mind so you try not to think about stupid stuff.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.