When I haven't looked in a mirror for a while, I worry that I look awful, and when I get to a mirror, I'm like "Oh yeah, that's what I look like".

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Pulling the same faces as the character you are reading currently is.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Accidentally scratching a surface and then scratching it again with the tops of your fingernails to even it out.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Just ocassionally stand up and pontlessly walk around the house when using the computer. Anyone?

thumb_up thumb_down -28

When you're in a public place, make up conversations between strangers. Example: Man to wife: Let's get out of here. There's no place to sit. Wife to man: Honey, we just got here. Man to wife: Maybe you didn't understand, Martha. There's no place to sit.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

When I am driving and I see another car being pulled over I think "Oh, so I am not the only one"

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Sometimes I reflect on my life and just feel humiliated.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

fart and then breathe it in really quick hoping no one else smells it first

thumb_up thumb_down -32

When I'm on a site that requires you to login with Facebook or Twitter to leave a comment, I click on the names of the nice looking ones to go see their pages to add them to my friends list.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Until just recently, I thought apple juice was made by the pee of the company. Just that they added sugar.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Listening to music walking through town and feeling like you're in a music video

thumb_up thumb_down -32

the power to regenerate your appendix

thumb_up thumb_down -32

When you're lying in bed and you fart, you pull the covers over your head to smell it.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

For some reason some guy at the office started calling me "Biggus Dickus" and that became my nickname from there on... ...Cant help but smirk whenever my female employees gather and ask one another "But what is that Biggus Dickus guys real name? Is he really "Biggus Dickus? Such a strange name, should we call him Biggus Dickus or? etc" Nero the clit collector: AND THEY WONDER WHY I REFUSE TO TELL THEM MY REAL NAME XD They even have bets to see which one can guess "Biggus Dickus`s" real name... ...WHAT? YOU COLLECT STAMPS! THATS TWICE AS CRUEL... Besides you got like ten, I got about 300.005.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Click an invisible pen I think is in my hand but is not constantly everyday.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

fall asleep in the shower.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

When at a restaurant you practice your order inside your head, then when you actually have to order you mess it up.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

use tweezers to pull out leg hair or armpit hair out of sheer boredom.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

in a grocery store, only walking on the colored single tiles the entire time your in there pretending there small cliffs without touching the white one otherwise you fall and fail.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

When masturbating at night, looking at the window paranoid that someone is watching. But stopping or moving out of view.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

eat cake in a bowl with milk the way you would eat a bowl of cereal

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Sometimes when I kill a bug, i wrap it up in a giant wad of paper towels, put it in a plastic sandwich bag, THEN throw it away. just in case...

thumb_up thumb_down -38

I often try to visualise and merge my faces with various girls i could potentially fall for, just to assess how our future children would look like.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

If my SOLVE media is too long I refresh it to give me a shorter one

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.