sometimes i feel like the person i look at in the mirror is not my own reflection

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When you cringe as you walk out of a store because you're paranoid the door will beep...

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Hate when people ask "do you have a bathroom?" It's like "no we crap in the yard!"

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Think that my ice tastes different than my water.

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When I Download A Song Or Movie And The Download Speed Slows Down I Think The FBI Is Tracking Me.

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Do a little half laugh, then when someone looks at you, you realise that it wasn't even funny so you pretend to be clearing your throat.

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Air guitar to a song of how you think it would be on a Guitar Hero game.

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try to make myself sneeze because I like the feeling I get when I do

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Say something smart in class, then worry your friends will rip ony uo for it half way through saying it, so end it by saying "or something like that."

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Anytime I walk in anyplace with cracks in the ground (tiled floors, cement squares, etc.) I do my best to avoid stepping on cracks in fear of something happening if I do.

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Feeling stupid when you're watching a funny movie and you laugh by yourself. So you look around and stop laughing.

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If I'm at work and have to poop, when I get in the stall I look under the opening at the bottom for any other feet in the other stalls to make sure I am alone. I always think what if when I do that someone else does it at the same time.

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when you're in the car, look outside and count every single lamp-post until the car stops

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I hit the frig after sex

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I chew my ice cream.

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When at Burger King, McDonalds etc. I always finish the drink before the food so that I still have the taste of the food in my mouth when I'm finished.

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When I'm making a weird face, I remind my self to stop before it gets stuck like that.

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When standing in long lines (stores, banks etc..) I think about how other people would react if I puked all over the place with no warning.

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Spend ages searching for a porno (normally about 40 minutes), search through it for the best bit, finish and think "what was the point of all that"

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Have a big twitch, freak out when you are dosing off in class but suddenly wake up.

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When sitting or laying down, tell yourself to get up in your head but see how long your body can resist your commands, and end up yelling at yourself to move in your head while still sitting/laying down.

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When you Saigon the couch and say "I am hungry" but then don't do anything because you are too lazy.

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I love touching, squeezing and occasionally biting my dog's (read: any dog's) muzzle. I love the texture and the gummy-ness. I also love how pissed he gets when I do it and sneezes after.

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pull out a flies wings and let it go

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.