I prefer to go to the bathroom with the door open.

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Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk without insurance and crashing into legal citizens who pay taxes and insurance leaving us with a debt in medical bills so that we cant afford physical therapy.

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When you're walking and think of something funny and start laughing, but you don't want people to think you're weird, so you pull out your phone and pretend you're texting.

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Left alone Big noise, people aren't expected back as soon so grab baseball bat and charge only to find them back early...."what you doing?" "batting my socks around practising my baseball skills"

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i answer "why" to questions and then when someone gets pissed i say "when" Hey Jim, how's Mary? Why? Because she's your sister and I care about you. Why? Because you're my best friend. Why? STOP IT! When?

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I hate it when people assume I'm smart just because I don't speak much and I wear glasses.

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Sometimes I wonder why I smell even though I remember putting DO on. I become embarrassed because there is a girl next to me. I hope she cannot smell it. Finally I realize its not me. It's her.

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I get mad at women because they menstruate and that's gross. I don't judge one woman individually for it, but I'm disgusted with the whole gender, which leads to being almost disgusted with myself for being attracted to them.

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I was not born in the country I am living in now

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Pretending you're a badass character from an anime or movie when listening to rock music (or something similar)

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You are thinking of really awkward moments that happened earlier in the day so then you subconsciously say a bunch of random things quickly out loud to get the thought of the awkward moment out of your head.

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When a tooth is very loose,i shake it with my tongue because that pain is relaxing.

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I was the real Stig...

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Never step on manholes, because I'm afraid to fall in.

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I don't like being told what I will do or how I will feel.

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I have a phobia of incest

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Talking to yourself in your head so you don't seem so crazy.

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When your watching a YouTube video and you have to watch an AD, you mute it and turn your head away because your just that pissed off at the company.

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Tells a joke only you thought was funny and still laughs then laughs harder because your the only one laughing nikki

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Find a really good joke on the internet and pretend you came up with it to make your friends think you're funny

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Press harder on the remote when I know the batteries are dead.

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While at the movies, grab and eat your popcorn with your tongue and pretend you are a lizard.

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dip my fries in ice cream! sometimes in soda. It's good!

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Being able to think about great ideas for the world, but not being able to get a math problem done.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.