Try to think of something nice when then thinks I the scariest things

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Ask me if an outfit makes you look fat? I'll say VERY!

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I'm a man. When I'm watching a movie with my wife and it has a sad ending. I allways have to cry but moments before the actual end has come I allready start to snif my nose so that she thinks I have a cold and do not have to cry about the ending of the movie.

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Whenever I finish reading a book, I feel a great sense of achievement.

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I talk through my teeth when i am talking to my pets.

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I twerk in the mirror to see how much my ass jiggles

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Being fat

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All of my friends go to halloween parties. I still go trick or treating.

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Discovering your friend is an indian (Nicole)

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I **** with no hands.

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Whenever Terminator 2 is on tv, I become enthralled and can't stop watching even though I've seen it a million times.

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I wake up right before the "sexy" part happens...

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worry about getting a little butt sweat mark on a chair if you've been sitting in it too long while its hot.

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Pretend my ski pole is a gun while I'm on the chair lift. Or just any object around when I'm not skiing.

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Talking to yourself in your head so you don't seem so crazy.

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When I get "interactive" commercials on my laptop screen, I like to "just shoot 4 out of 5 ducks" and feel like I have cheated the system.

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accidently sleep on my arm and it falls asleep

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Feel bad about hurting someone a long time ago, when I was a child, and wish I could speak to that person and say "I'm sorry." Cringe whenever the thought of the incident rises.

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Constantly refresh your email page even though you know nothing will appear.

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Hate when people ask "do you have a bathroom?" It's like "no we crap in the yard!"

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When I Download A Song Or Movie And The Download Speed Slows Down I Think The FBI Is Tracking Me.

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try to make myself sneeze because I like the feeling I get when I do

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it is not disgusting to bite your toe nails, it is a skill

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When you see someone you know in a shopping centre and you pretend that you didnt see them at all because you cant be bothered striking up a conversation.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.