Press harder on the remote when I know the batteries are dead.

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Sitting down on the toitlet to pee (being a male). It's so comfortable when you're tired. Also: Wonder if there's a female version of this, where girls stand up to take a piss. Just curiosity.

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Chewing your chips softer so you can hear the tv

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When your to lazy try to use the force to pick things up

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Sniff or tap to a rhythm to some sort of beat I composed in my head...

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I try to say something, but a bunch of people are talking at the same time so I yell at them to shut up and as soon as I say something I realize I was wrong so I say"okay" as calm as possible to keep from looking like a douche

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Sometimes I get annoyed when I realize none of my friends ever eat vegetables or drink anything but sugary soda`s and are somehow as healthy, sometimes even healthier than me.

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Only one tissue left in the box... I'll just use toilet paper.

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Invented a special password for yourself in order to recognize yourself if travel through time.

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I hit the frig after sex

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I love touching, squeezing and occasionally biting my dog's (read: any dog's) muzzle. I love the texture and the gummy-ness. I also love how pissed he gets when I do it and sneezes after.

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I don't care about who a celebrity dates or marries. Why should I?

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Tryng to run away from, or at least be faster than my shadow.

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Listening to a song, thinking about having the life of the singer in the band

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Whenever I hear a baby or a young child scream very loud, I imagine that their head will explode.

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Turn off light in bed... notice something you haven't seen before. IT'S SLENDERMAN You turn the light back on and realized it was a lamp

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TV turned on just so... Makes you not feeling alone or because some other unknown (or) irrational reason.And of course, feeling guilty cause you spending energy and money but still... Most of the time you just don't care.

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I mean Diana Ross.

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I have a band in my head that performs for me every time I listen to music.

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I have an imaginary therapist. I talk to him in my head and he actually gives me really good answers.

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Being in the car and wondering if your parents can read your mind so you think "If you can here me cough in 3, 2, 1..." Sometimes my dad actually does it and he looks back at me and smiles. .-.

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Open my mouth while doing my mascara... it's impossible not to!!!

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Spend a ton of time on the way you look and the clothes you choose, then going out in public and imagining you're a celeb.

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Criticize a porn novel for its poor use of the English language

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.