When I'm walking and I step on a crack with my left food, the next time I step on a crack it has to be my right foot and vise versa. I can't step on a crack twice in a row with the same foot. But I don't have to step on every crack.

eat cake in a bowl with milk the way you would eat a bowl of cereal

i pull for the chicken when peter and the chicken fight on family guy cause peter is a jackhole

I'm a guy and I like to wear swimwear as underwear

If I'm walking with or behind someone I always match their footsteps

see a old couple in the street and think," i wonder if he still bangs her" lol

Eat everything inside my burgers first then i eat the buns.

I say that girl's name I have a crush on right before I go to sleep because I want her to be the last thing I think about, and then wake up realizing that it was super creepy... Only to do it again the next night

Bored. Open refrigerator. Nothing to eat. Open it again five minutes later.

Lay between the wall and the bed when the bed is pefectly fine

Sneeze for a few minutes when I've eaten too much.

Think what would I be doing if I was someone else

jump down the stairs when im almost down to save time

Thinking about life as if its just a dream and wondeing if one day your just going to wake up and be like " wtf just happend".....

Ur mum

when im in the toilet and invent something in my mind and dont have a pen and paper to wright my invention and when im done i forget about it...

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

Burglars have become very clever. Just last night my wife turned to me and said that she hears burglars downstairs so I got up quietly checked every room suddenly I realised that I don't have a wife.

Think of all the perverted and disgusting things that I'd like to do to the women at work then feel bad for being a vile and disgusting person, then kind of feel turned on anyway lol.

I rehearse arguments in my head.

Whenever I get in the shower, no matter what, I always have to pee.

Pretend like i'm having a conversation with someone talking to somebody on a phone, and randomly say something to go with what the person says.

Use the letters on my phone to make words to help me remember important numbers

Put the porn sound in a really low volume even when you have headphones, just to make sure noone can hear it. Then take off the headphones once in a while to check if it sounds too loud.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.