Being in the car and wondering if your parents can read your mind so you think "If you can here me cough in 3, 2, 1..." Sometimes my dad actually does it and he looks back at me and smiles. .-.

when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

Pretend the legs of a chair are the barrels of a mini gun while moving them.

Whenever someone enters a pin number I always try to see how many number I can remember

while I am sitting on the toilet I play with it and waste the toilet paper and of course i just keep flushing it

Think long and hard about something but then realise you don't care

taking your t shirt or sweatshirt off quickly so nothing gets you while its over your face

There's this reassuring voice in my head. She's almost like a mother, telling me that it'll be alright and that I have things to do.

I wonder if elections are rigged?

I don't use my car air conditioning because I think it's wasteful and it might "run-out" when I'm REALLY, REALLY hot.

I put the volume on my television so it is on any number divisible by five (5-10-15 etc. etc.)

I chuckle whenever I hear the phase "Stark raving mad." I don't know why.

When you're out for a run, you pretend that someone is chasing after you so you run harder.

When home alone and you hear a noise getting out a gun/weapon.

Sometime when I'm alone, I like to fill my bathtub with marinara sauce and pretend I'm a meatball.

When I meet someone random, and have a small conversation, and then when they leave, I feel sad because I think I am never going to see them again.

When you're in a public place, make up conversations between strangers. Example: Man to wife: Let's get out of here. There's no place to sit. Wife to man: Honey, we just got here. Man to wife: Maybe you didn't understand, Martha. There's no place to sit.

Sometimes I reflect on my life and just feel humiliated.

When a passneger in the car, I sing songs in my head and hope the song is in time with the signs and streetlights as I drive past them.

Whenever on a car ride, pretend you are in a military convoy and shoot at pursuing helicopters and soldiers.

the power to regenerate your appendix

Point your finger to the sky when your favorite song comes on in the club or the radio

For some reason some guy at the office started calling me "Biggus Dickus" and that became my nickname from there on... ...Cant help but smirk whenever my female employees gather and ask one another "But what is that Biggus Dickus guys real name? Is he really "Biggus Dickus? Such a strange name, should we call him Biggus Dickus or? etc" Nero the clit collector: AND THEY WONDER WHY I REFUSE TO TELL THEM MY REAL NAME XD They even have bets to see which one can guess "Biggus Dickus`s" real name... ...WHAT? YOU COLLECT STAMPS! THATS TWICE AS CRUEL... Besides you got like ten, I got about 300.005.

Freak out at sudden noises when home alone at night.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.