Sitting down on the toitlet to pee (being a male). It's so comfortable when you're tired. Also: Wonder if there's a female version of this, where girls stand up to take a piss. Just curiosity.

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Glance at your friend beside you, smile to yourself, and think, "I could murder them."

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When your to lazy try to use the force to pick things up

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When theres a car just like yours right next to your car in the parking lot you almoat always gravitate to that car instead. It's the worst when there people in the car and you keep trying to open it.

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Say something smart in class, then worry your friends will rip ony uo for it half way through saying it, so end it by saying "or something like that."

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I take a poop and then stand up to pee because I'm a man

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whenever i'm holding a kitchen knife, i feel super weird like i'm gonna stab someone.... its not like i would ever do that, but i think about what would happen if i just impaled the person that is standing near me with a huge knife.

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try to make myself sneeze because I like the feeling I get when I do

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If I'm at work and have to poop, when I get in the stall I look under the opening at the bottom for any other feet in the other stalls to make sure I am alone. I always think what if when I do that someone else does it at the same time.

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When no one is home, I poop with the door open, just because I can.

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When you see someone you know in a shopping centre and you pretend that you didnt see them at all because you cant be bothered striking up a conversation.

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when you're in the car, look outside and count every single lamp-post until the car stops

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Feeling stupid when you're watching a funny movie and you laugh by yourself. So you look around and stop laughing.

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I hit the frig after sex

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Use my phone to see what time it is

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Half of these posts are all but "things you think only you do". So is mine

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When sitting or laying down, tell yourself to get up in your head but see how long your body can resist your commands, and end up yelling at yourself to move in your head while still sitting/laying down.

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Turn off light in bed... notice something you haven't seen before. IT'S SLENDERMAN You turn the light back on and realized it was a lamp

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I know how to Gleek on command. (Don't know what it is just look it up.)

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not be afraid of hurricane sandy

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I scratch and sniff.

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When you Saigon the couch and say "I am hungry" but then don't do anything because you are too lazy.

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I have an imaginary therapist. I talk to him in my head and he actually gives me really good answers.

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I see something glittery, someone tells me not to pick it up because I'll glitter all over myself, I pick it up anyway and glitter all over myself.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.