Look at the least popular comments just out of interest

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while I am sitting on the toilet I play with it and waste the toilet paper and of course i just keep flushing it

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Go to the kitchen to eat, forget what I'm doing, go back to whatever I was doing, and realizing that I'm hungry.

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cussing someone out on a video game only to realize that your mic is off

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Spend a ton of time on the way you look and the clothes you choose, then going out in public and imagining you're a celeb.

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Surfing nsfw subreddit at work

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Use the 0.3141592653589793238462643383279502884 second rule

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I always have to remake my bed right before going to sleep in it

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Point your finger to the sky When your favorite comes on in the club or on the radio

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Sit on the back of the commode when at work to give yourself an impromptu break.

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Smile like an idiot while reading this site.

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I can only brush my teeth at exactly 7:43 AM...Am I weird?

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I try really hard to come up with a funny joke on antijokes.com, then I give up and come to this website instead.

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Having to poop in a certain way to avoid your ass sucking it in again. If it all comes out in one go, the cleaning becomes a lot easier and more satisfying.

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Being fat

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I used to be the third most useless invention in the world, and now I am so sad, I mean I lost to a square wheel! Moral: On the bright side, ill never be as useless as Rustin Beaver.

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Kill Jb without getting aressted.

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When your watching a YouTube video and you have to watch an AD, you mute it and turn your head away because your just that pissed off at the company.

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Start the shower so no one hears you shit bricks

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My brother (who is 2 years younger) and I have our own language, consisting of movie quotes and silly stuff we made up when we were little. We speak it with abandon when we're alone, and try as hard as we can to suppress it when we're with a friend. But sometimes some of it slips out, and the friend looks at us like he's the guy who isn't in on the joke; I always get the feeling he or she thinks the two of us are crazy. By the way, if you're the third person in company with two close siblings who are speaking their own secret language, don't ask them to explain or look at them like they're crazy. They're not nuts, and you won't understand, even if they try to explain. Just let it pass.

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Read things from this page and think to self: "Thank God, I thought I was the only one."

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Tip my couch over to dig for something I have lost and then end up finding a bunch of random crap.

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I think about fat women while poking my skinny girlfriend

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It takes me a whole afternoon to write an important/professional email cause i keep thinking about what I should and should not write and it gets so stupidly difficult I take one hour breaks between every sentence.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.