when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

When I see a post on this site with a single downvote I start to feel guilty and give the person an upvote because I feel sorry for them.

Learning a definition of a word and after that seeing it everywhere.

Wanting to change your name to Peter Jankins

Going to the bathroom in public just to scratch my butt

Set multiple alarms to wake me up in the morning so I dont just turn it off and fall back asleep

shit corn, even though i havent recently eaten corn.

Sometimes when I fart while sitting down, I lift one leg up.

Accidently send an empty text or text multiple people and send wrong text to wrong person

like it when you fart because it scratches your butt when its itchy

Sometime when I'm alone, I like to fill my bathtub with marinara sauce and pretend I'm a meatball.

I put the volume on my television so it is on any number divisible by five (5-10-15 etc. etc.)

Whenever on a car ride, pretend you are in a military convoy and shoot at pursuing helicopters and soldiers.

When ever i watch a movie with my parents i hope to god there is no nudity or awkward sex talk

Find myself thinking a completely random meaningless sentence as I'm falling asleep with no idea how I got to that thought.

When I'm on a site that requires you to login with Facebook or Twitter to leave a comment, I click on the names of the nice looking ones to go see their pages to add them to my friends list.

Write b as d and d as b or p as q and q as p. I mostly write b as d and d as b since I've learned the alphabet. Trying not to do that now

I talk to inanimate objects daily.

the power to regenerate your appendix

I pretend that my pillow is the love of my life and kiss it and cuddle it before bed.

in a grocery store, only walking on the colored single tiles the entire time your in there pretending there small cliffs without touching the white one otherwise you fall and fail.

turn off the tv by accident and then turn it on only to find that it takes forever to work again

If I'm walking with or behind someone I always match their footsteps

only read the short jokes on this website

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.