only read the short jokes on this website

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Look in the fridge 10 times without eating anything

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Paranoid someone is reading your mind, so you think something weird to see if they look at you

thumb_up thumb_down -41

While talking on the phone you can't think of anything to say then it gets awkwardly quiet

thumb_up thumb_down -41

If my SOLVE media is too long I refresh it to give me a shorter one

thumb_up thumb_down -43

Realizing that I can just yell out the word "Fuck!" and no one can stop me.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

After reading something from this site, I find myself compelled to try it.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

thumb_up thumb_down -43

I use encryption even for everyday, routine communications because f*ck the NSA.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

Blow into the shower head when I'm taking a shower to make what sounds like jet noises

thumb_up thumb_down -43

Making gang signs out the window when your parents let you ride in the front seat

thumb_up thumb_down -45

jump down the stairs when im almost down to save time

thumb_up thumb_down -47

I strum my fingers on my other hand between the fingers on the other hand which is a fist to make a popping sound (Try it, it's really fun)

thumb_up thumb_down -47

Sometimes when I look in the mirror I act out a scene like Tyra banks coming up to me and asking me to be on America's next top model.

thumb_up thumb_down -47

Ask me if an outfit makes you look fat? I'll say VERY!

thumb_up thumb_down -49

At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a hardon and make people think it's that big all time.

thumb_up thumb_down -51

Something that bothers me is when a movie sequel comes out and for whatever reason the same things from the first movie happens so they just end up making the same movie

thumb_up thumb_down -51

trying to piss after masturbation hurts.

thumb_up thumb_down -51

Having more dificulty thinking in your native language than your 2nd or 3rd one. Or 4th one. Or... the rest. I highly doubt that one's common.

thumb_up thumb_down -53

Think of all the perverted and disgusting things that I'd like to do to the women at work then feel bad for being a vile and disgusting person, then kind of feel turned on anyway lol.

thumb_up thumb_down -53

When you walk across a cross walk and you stretch your steps so it takes one step for each line, yet you still try to look casual because ur in public

thumb_up thumb_down -55

You feel like someone can read your mind so you try not to think about stupid stuff.

thumb_up thumb_down -55

I rehearse arguments in my head.

thumb_up thumb_down -55

Love feet. like LOVE feet.

thumb_up thumb_down -59

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.