Sometimes I wonder why I smell even though I remember putting DO on. I become embarrassed because there is a girl next to me. I hope she cannot smell it. Finally I realize its not me. It's her.

I hum the MLP:FIM theme and hope no one recognizes the tune.

....you're high and you think you write complete bullshit?

When a tooth is very loose,i shake it with my tongue because that pain is relaxing.

I like to go out without shoes on hot days and play the floor is lava

I have minions that do what I want because pleasing me makes them happy. Moral: I control, the way you move, how do you like my grove zerg dude?

Run faster down hotel corridors.

Make fun of someone for something. Then realize you do the same thing

Still sitting on the toilet 20 minutes after you're done crapping... you're not alone.. -Professor.

Get somewhat worried about myself if I'm thumbed down on THIS SITE.

Sometimes I'll think about something that's so weird nobody would ever do it, and then i figure there's a big chance somebody did it at least once in history.

At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a harding and make people think it's that big all the time.

Take your laptop to the toilet with you, as a modern day equivalent of the newspaper.

Sometimes I accidentally move my mouth in a way where it suddenly makes a random farting noise so I immediately just make more obviously made fart noises just so people wont think I actually farted. Is that only me?

Constantly refresh your email page even though you know nothing will appear.

when i piss in the toilet, i flush half way through and race the toilet to the finish.

While I Am on the computer late at night, my Mum tells me to go to bed, I say I will in a second. I stay for a few more minutes, my mum tells me again, I do the same thing...

When no one is around, kick a push door open to feel like a badass.

Think that my ice tastes different than my water.

Feeling sorry for objects to throw away!! Haha anyone els?

Say something smart in class, then worry your friends will rip ony uo for it half way through saying it, so end it by saying "or something like that."

Sometimes I get annoyed when I realize none of my friends ever eat vegetables or drink anything but sugary soda`s and are somehow as healthy, sometimes even healthier than me.

Read things from this page and think to self: "Thank God, I thought I was the only one."

You think about all the stupid things you did in elementary school and avoid anyone who went to your elementary school in high school.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.