When it's as quiet as possible in the classroom in the middle of the period and everyone is silently doing their work.... I suddenly think of something REALLY funny and spend the next half hour awkwardly grinning trying my hardest not to burst out uncontrollably.

thumb_up thumb_down

Spend ages searching for a porno (normally about 40 minutes), search through it for the best bit, finish and think "what was the point of all that"

thumb_up thumb_down

When watching TV shows, I always think about what I would have done differently if I was the character in that particular situation.

thumb_up thumb_down

Turn off light in bed... notice something you haven't seen before. IT'S SLENDERMAN You turn the light back on and realized it was a lamp

thumb_up thumb_down

When you think about your life then think your parents had to have sex to make you. Then start thinking about all the gross old teachers you've had that probably had sex. Then when you get older your parents tell you about all the times they had sex when you were in the house.

thumb_up thumb_down

I think any disasterous accidents will not happen to me.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Sometimes, when I'm at work, I j3rk 0ff in the bathroom. Please tell me someone else has done this????

thumb_up thumb_down -10

I am a masculine guy but in private I listen to very sensitive songs. ie: careless wispers

thumb_up thumb_down -12

I pretend I'm a really popular YouTuber and talk to nobody thinking they're my subscribers.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Guessing on those annoying Captcha things and then getting unnecessarily angry when it tells you you're wrong.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

I like to watch people and imagine different stories that could explain why they're doing whatever it is that their doing.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

put wood glue on my hand, blow it dry and peel it off to make fake skin

thumb_up thumb_down -14

cover myself in vaseline and roll around on the floor pretending im a slug

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Pretend the legs of a chair are the barrels of a mini gun while moving them.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Think long and hard about something but then realise you don't care

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Criticize a porn novel for its poor use of the English language

thumb_up thumb_down -18

I stick used soap to a new soap so I don't waste it.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

taking your t shirt or sweatshirt off quickly so nothing gets you while its over your face

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Wake up after a dream. About a day later you think about if it was real or not.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Sometimes at a red light, I like to look at the person driving next to me and if they look towards me I quickly turn around and pretend I wasn't looking at them.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

I wonder if elections are rigged?

thumb_up thumb_down -24

When I wake up after having a good dream I try to remember it but I don't

thumb_up thumb_down -24

When I look at a clear blue sky, I'm convinced that I see little tiny floaty things, and think that I'm seeing air molecules.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Sometime when I'm alone, I like to fill my bathtub with marinara sauce and pretend I'm a meatball.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.