I have dreams that I am really rich and wake up to be thankful for my life just the way it is

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Trying to figure out what form of suicide would hurt the least.

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I would try to make my pencil shavings as long as possible.

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A lot of times I believe things I see or things that happen are "signs" of something.

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Listening to a song, thinking about having the life of the singer in the band

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Whenever i do something bad to someone I can't stop smiling even though i never wanted to smile in the first place and i feel like people think I'm a terrible person

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cussing someone out on a video game only to realize that your mic is off

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never wanting to poop in other houses. You have to use your toilet

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Look at adigital clock sideways when in bed while tryingto sleep and try to make the numbers look like faces

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When I get in the car I look in the backseat for monsters or psychopathic killers and as I am turning to check I say out loud 'Oh, maybe my book is in the backseat, let me check' so the monster or killer doesn't know I'm really looking back there for them. That way they might not kill me.

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Dutch oven myself when I'm lying in bed trying to sleep

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You or someone you know has a secret crush/liking but the always shout it to the world. My sister does that.(It's why I ask)

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Sometimes when I'm laughing really hard I awkwardly clap my hands.

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Being in the car and wondering if your parents can read your mind so you think "If you can here me cough in 3, 2, 1..." Sometimes my dad actually does it and he looks back at me and smiles. .-.

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cover myself in vaseline and roll around on the floor pretending im a slug

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When I'm at home alone, I feel like people are watching me through my windows, so I act completely civil.

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I don't know why but I really wish I can ride a bike or drive a car through a shopping mall.

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i leave tv on when i sleep...cant close it cause i hate to hear....noices...in my bedroom that cant identify......

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Criticize a porn novel for its poor use of the English language

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get annoyed when the pop-up lid on the dish soap bottle is left up

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when sleeping over at someone's house, make a cringing, weird looking face while opening the fridge in the middle of the night like somehow the look on your face will change the volume of the seal breaking open

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Taking your headphones/earbuds off a lot to see if your music is playing loudly. Or to see if other people could possibly hear it

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Before going to the bathroom, check behind the shower curtains for serial killers.

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Leave those last one or two sheets of toilet paper after taking a crap just so you don't have to replace it.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.