- Things You Think Only You Do

only read the short jokes on this website

Thinking something embarrassing, then having to talk to someone and suddenly getting worried you are about to blurt out your thoughts

Try to figure out if some of the posts were written by the same person.

Say the Lord's name in vain, then say "sorry God" under my breath right after.

The power to put a pointless super power on thingsyouthinkonlyyoudo.com

I throw a piece of paper in the toilet and try to "sink it" either with my "super stream wave" and if it does not work, I unleash my secret (but not always available weapon) "dept charge bombs".

I have an irrational fear of automatic flushing toilets.

When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

When in class , I move alot in my chair when my butt itches .

Reading all these posts and being reminded that we are all more similar to each other than we think, regardless of whatever group each of us may belong to.

when passing someone in a car beside you, you try to wonder where they are going just by looking at them, their clothes or their expressions

Get turned on when you see a girl yawn

I think Frozen is an overrated film

I sometimes chew on the inside of my cheek

Blow into the shower head when I'm taking a shower to make what sounds like jet noises

after taking a dump i always still smell a little bit of poop and i wonder if other people smell it too

Sometimes I think my shit smells delicious... and I cant believe I am actually not only typing it here, but "finally" admitting it to myself.

get a really delicious smelling soap or candle and feel sad when you remember you can't eat it.

Something that bothers me is when a movie sequel comes out and for whatever reason the same things from the first movie happens so they just end up making the same movie

At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a hardon and make people think it's that big all time.

Panic when your car alarm goes off while you are going to get in because you suddenly look like a criminal.

Sleeping with one leg under the blanket and one out.

Pretending there is a man running beside you during a long car journey and jumping over obstacles

carry my cat by holding it's front and back legs

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.