Think "When are we ever going to use this in our life?" while sitting bored in school.

run inside after taking out the trash because a monster might be hiding in the big trash can

Make scary faces in the mirror and try to scare myself

I plant my feet firmly when the subway approaches in case a random stranger tries to kill me by pushing me in front of the train.

Receiving or finding something cool in your dream, then waking up thinking you have it and realize you don't.

Find yourself alone at a party/gathering of some sort... Pretend to send a text to make people think you're not a loner.

instinctively thumb down long posts without reading them.

While waiting on someone I check my phone and if there is no new message I just read old ones, just to be occupied and don't look stupid or lost

I always twist my washcloth into a cone shape, so when I take my next shower it is dry and hardened. Then I pretend stab it into my stomach and say "MY LIFE FOR AIUR!" before getting it wet again.

Flush the toilet before peeing to see if I can accomplish peeing before the water flushes away. :)

Stuff 13 chips in my mouth when no one is looking, bite 1 chip in half and chew it for 30 seconds when someone is looking.

I pretend that my actions are perceived by a past self and they're always astounded by the change I've gone through.

Whenever i am watching TV my parents always walk by at the worst part like a sex scene or a dirty joke.

Sometimes I wipe my butt so violently that my finger goes through the toilet paper and into my butt hole. I enjoy it and question my sexuality. ;)

Fear that the CIA is secretly wathing you.

I scold or point at my electronics and tell them "No, bad!" whenever I push the wrong button or shut them off on accident.

When I am home alone and I hear something upstairs, I pretend my Dad is here and say really loudly, "Hey Dad! When are you going to your violent national wrestling match tonight?!"

When I'm on Facebook, I flip between someone's most recent profile picture and their first one, just to see how much they've changed.

Realizing that when you look behind a shower curtain before using the bathroom and actually see a Serial killer, you have no plan...

I control water in the shower.

Agree with someones ridiculous political opinion just to avoid an argument.

Walking around store and store clerk asks are you finding everything ok..and you reply yes and you...

Think that a movie is shorter after you watch it once or twice

See the person you like at school, have a quick random sexual thought about them, le random boner appears, and you flip out in your mind

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.