Pee sitting down so I dont have to aim

thumb_up thumb_down +82

Consider selling lots of books, games or DVDs when you have too many to fit perfectly on their shelf.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

When leaving a poop smear under the water in the toilet that doesn't get flushed away, I put a few pieces of toilet paper on the water surface to conceal it.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

when im losing an argument, ill start singing my responses

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Fall asleep at night fantasizing about how you wish life situations would play out.

thumb_up thumb_down -74

Rub boogers under the arm rest on the couch.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Having small fingers and, regardless, still unable to click on the right thing when on the internet with a touch screen phone.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Realising that there are ASSHOLES posting dumb shit on this site.

thumb_up thumb_down -51

As im about to fall asleep sometimes i feel like im falling and then i have a muscle spasem and wake up.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

instinctively thumb down long posts without reading them.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

When I look at a digital clock, i try to rearrange the number to make them a math equation

thumb_up thumb_down -66

I stop the microwave at 1 second so that one someone else uses it it beeps

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Mentally preparing yourself to step on a crunchy-looking leaf, only to discover it is in fact soggy, soft and unsatisfactory.

thumb_up thumb_down -74

Find yourself alone at a party/gathering of some sort... Pretend to send a text to make people think you're not a loner.

thumb_up thumb_down +79

play with a laser pointer and pretend its a lightsaber

thumb_up thumb_down -1

When I am home alone and I hear something upstairs, I pretend my Dad is here and say really loudly, "Hey Dad! When are you going to your violent national wrestling match tonight?!"

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Try to pet your cat with your foot.

thumb_up thumb_down -47

Stay up late on the weekdays and go to bed early on the weekends ..... What is wrong with me?

thumb_up thumb_down -49

When I'm driving through traffic lights that are green, I use my psychic powers to make them change so no one behind me gets through.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Walking around store and store clerk asks are you finding everything ok..and you reply yes and you...

thumb_up thumb_down +8

If no one else is home and you have to go to the bathroom, but you're invested in what you're doing on your laptop, you take it with you.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Every time I open a door, I shout out "Alohamora!" and then I open it.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Happy April 28th everyone! Today is the first day of the rest of your lives, a time for new beginnings to run wild, a time to put a final ending to the past mistakes and troubling thoughts that may have been clouding your mind for far too long until now... The time is here, The time is now, Today is the day, Right here, right now, Right this moment, This is the right time... This, IS THE TIME TO DECIDE... To take time to make time, and let time pass by while you try to decide on how you wanna live your life? Falling into the same patterns as time before, and as will be, time after time? OR, simply, you can choose to LIVE... letting yourself have the time of YOUR LIFE!!! =) The choice is yours, what will you decide??? <3

thumb_up thumb_down -82

While waiting on someone I check my phone and if there is no new message I just read old ones, just to be occupied and don't look stupid or lost

thumb_up thumb_down -88

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.