Praying to God even though you tell people you're an Atheist.

when I take a big dump I turn around to see how big it is

sleep with your legs crossed like your meditating.

If I'd see a grizzly bear in the forest I'd probably try to run away even though every sane person says that that's exactly the thing you shouldn't do

When i lie, i try not to swallow because i think they'll notice - John

Pour cereal. Realize there is no milk. You really want cereal so you try it with water. Realize that was a bad idea.

When I pee if there is already some toilet paper there I try to sink it with my pee.

Sometimes I become paranoid that the ceiling is going to randomly come crashing down and kill me.

When I masturbate I trade hands often in fear that my penis may become crooked.

When i'm done sleeping, I wake up.

I stare at people to see if they have a innie or outtie belly button

Think that the shirts and bras that the girl you like should have never ben invented for that one specific person

when i'm in a really good mood i think everybody is watching and admiring me

When I get photographed with a flash and afterwards there is that little greenish dot in my vision, I keep trying to look at it directly, although I know that it's impossible

I can't help spitting into the toilet when I piss, let it drop out my mouth and hit the water to see if I can get it in the center.

If I'm doing something that involves two ppl i race even if the other person doesn't know it and if i win i get a huge ass grin which is awkward sometimes

I put morals on posts to get a thumbs up. Moral: Posts with morals get thumbs up.

If someone uses a term thats like, in the know, and they ask if i know what it means, ill act like, of course ido, even if i dont, and then ill go home and look it up.

When I'm bored I throw a plastic bag in the air and see how long I can keep it from touching the ground.

Buying a new song, listening to it on repeat for hours until it gets old, and then never listening to it again.

Whenever we watch a movie or stupid educational film in school, I sleep.

incognito mode on google chrome

Drying yourself after the shower with a towl, wiping your ass dry and beeing scared when you dry other parts of your body you dont use the same part of the towl.

Closed the door to the refrigerator super slow, just to watch the light turn off.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.