you spread your cheeks apart when you sit on the the tolet so that your poop does not touch your cheaks

thumb_up thumb_down

im going to RAPEEEE that girl

thumb_up thumb_down -138

Slate the game you playing but always go back for more...ie FIFA, Cod!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -101

misread flashlight

thumb_up thumb_down +68

I'm 30, but to this day I still have fantasies about rescuing the girl that I'm secretly in love with from a dangerous situation. The fantasies get increasingly ridiculous, sometimes they even involve superhero stuff. It's as if my own mind was trying to let me know that I should grow the f*** up.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Think about blinking, and then realize that when you think about blinking, you can't stop thinking about blinking, and thus a 3-4 minute awkward blinking-fest begins.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

tell everyone that you think that mcdonalds is unhealthy and that you think there food is nasty but in reality you actually love it.

thumb_up thumb_down -55

If there's a mirror i look if there's people around looking at me, and if there aren't it's ok to stare at my reflection.

thumb_up thumb_down -89

When taking trash up to the street, I always runback as fast as I can, counting down from 5, pretending there's a sniper about to shoot me.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Get turned on lookin at my own butt

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Pee in a glass and pour it down the sink, if someone is using the bathroom already.

thumb_up thumb_down -82

Having to step on snails to hear the crunch

thumb_up thumb_down +55

Forgets something then walks into the room to get it then forgets what you forgot nikki

thumb_up thumb_down +51

Everytime I get new magazines or brochures in the mail I like to open them and smell them. Same with new electronics, I love that new smell.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

When you accidentally mess up a password, delete the entire thing and redo it since you don't know which part you messed up.

thumb_up thumb_down +82

pinch your nostrils in between your finger and thumb and rub them back and forth in order to smell the inside of your nose.

thumb_up thumb_down -92

if im alone and singing to music, i watch myself in the mirror

thumb_up thumb_down +5

fart

thumb_up thumb_down -22

I always leave a little coffee in the pot so that it becomes someone elses problem

thumb_up thumb_down -24

I like to have a picture of my crush on my computer screen, and will walk around a room while he 'looks at me'.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Say you're not hungry at a friend's house when his/her parents offer you food, even though you're starving

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Thinking about what you want to dream about while brushing your teeth at night.

thumb_up thumb_down -56

Date your English paper so it looks like you did it earlier (rather than saving it for the last minute).

thumb_up thumb_down -104

While I am busy working I like to have music playing and while I type I type to the song and its beat

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.