Aim at shit stains whilst I pee.

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Tried to stuff yourself in the fridge

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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put my headphones in but don't listen to any music so people don't bother me.

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Think I'm going to fall down when I step onto an esculator that's not moving.

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even though you know you turned the light off, you have to go check before you can get to sleep

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When home alone, you feel the need to turn on every light/appliance so you won't hear the serial killer who you are sure hides in your basement

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When I'm bored I throw a plastic bag in the air and see how long I can keep it from touching the ground.

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Whenever I leave a phone message, I feel like I'm leaving the last message I will every leave to my family in my life because I will somehow die soon. I've watched too much drama.

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trying to look cool when you're driving past other cars.

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When its nighttime, you walk around the house with one of your small animals in your arms, like it can protect you from anything

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Get sharp pains in your chest whenever you're watching or reading a sex scene.

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When taking trash up to the street, I always runback as fast as I can, counting down from 5, pretending there's a sniper about to shoot me.

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When taking a shower, and standing in the opposite direction where the water is coming fromY

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masturbate... with condoms and gloves because male genitalia is gross and clean up takes just a few seconds rather than minutes

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after doing the dishes i get my hands wet after putting my jumper on cause i failed 2 dry my hands propley my arms a f***** cold dammit!!

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Having a dream where I am in a sex Ed class and instead of looking at slides experiencing everything firsthand

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I sleep in the nude.

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when something on the internet is loading really long i close all the other tabs so my computer can concentrate only on one thing and then i get annoyed because i have to open up all the tabs again

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grab my cats tongue when he is licking my hand

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feel disappointed when i find out that a p0rn scene is just the actor's dream or imagination.

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When I go up the stairs, I always have to end on my right foot. If I have to, I will even hop on one foot on the last stair in order to land on it.

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When walking along, I try to race someone walking towards me. For example, a letter box is ahead of me and there is someone walking towards me. I will try and reach the letter box before the other person without looking awkward.. then feel like God if I manage to do it.

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get insulted when lazy people cheer you to work hard

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.