Blow dry my dick and balls after getting out of the shower.

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When walking along, I try to race someone walking towards me. For example, a letter box is ahead of me and there is someone walking towards me. I will try and reach the letter box before the other person without looking awkward.. then feel like God if I manage to do it.

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Thinking that you're the only person on Earth, and everyone else is there just to affect you.

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Any time I break something, I always try to put it back so it looks completely normal. That way, the next person who picks it up will have it break right in their hands… Thus becoming their fault... -Ikka

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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When I first start dating or seeing someone I write down options for conversation starters before I phone them in case it goes silent.

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masturbate... with condoms and gloves because male genitalia is gross and clean up takes just a few seconds rather than minutes

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I have to fart real bad but people are around me , so I try to silent fart

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im going to rape that girl

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Yelling my cats name in my mind to see if i can get him to look at me using the power of my mind

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When in a public bathroom, flush the toilet right before your shit falls into the water, so no one will hear.

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Get sharp pains in your chest whenever you're watching or reading a sex scene.

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Think I'm going to fall down when I step onto an esculator that's not moving.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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When I go up the stairs, I always have to end on my right foot. If I have to, I will even hop on one foot on the last stair in order to land on it.

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I use the power-stance sometimes when I poop. It's where you completely remove one leg from your pants and put the shoe back on. Your legs can go further apart.

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When I stop thinking about about something it'll turn out that I've been staring at someone without meaning to.

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Dancing while hoovering

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get insulted when lazy people cheer you to work hard

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Any time I shop for used clothes, I always have to ask, “Did anybody die in this?” –Ikka

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when i'm in the shower and i close my eyes, i thnk something's gonna be there to scare me when i open my eyes again.

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Sometimes when my mom is aking me something and then i tell her the truth i start smirking automatically as if i'd be lying because i don't know how to make a serious face

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when I need to do a number 2 in a public toilet I put toilet paper in there first so my neighbours cant hear it.

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feel legitimately bad for Wile E Coyote whenever he does not get the road runner

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.