Fake a yawn to see if other people will yawn back.

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Not knowing whether to change it or not on a scantron test when the same letter appears more than 3 times in a row: A D C C C C .....but all the of my answers make sense!

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go to the bathroom, turn on the hot water, get undressed so that the water has time to heat up

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I very carefully smell what I'm about to eat before I eat it, but I'd most likely eat it, even if I hadn't smelled it first.

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Whenever I slurp from a straw I do it a little bit at a time, slowly and steadily so people don't turn at me and give me an annoyed face.

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When I fart I immediately go 'Eww. Who farted? That's gross'. And I blame it on someone else, always works :)

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When I do a fresh pile of laundry I throw them on my bed and lay in them.

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Press the Microwave open button at 0:01 to feel like you defused a bomb and avoided that stupid beeping.

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when im lying in bed in summer and im hot i just turn my sheets on the other side so its cool again

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When you sit down to a great dinner with all your favorite foods and then the nanosecond your ass touches the chair you are instantly he most tired and uninterested in food than you have ever been before

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during texting you set your phone in your lap right before a car is about to pass you so they dont see you texting and driving

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being a mid-teenager, never having a relationship before and don't care at all.

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I wipe the part of the glass or water bottle i drink from

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Fart when i'm alone RIGHT before someone walks in... try to talk over the smell...

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That microscopic flying things that follows my eyes' motion, especially when i look up in the sky.

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I sometimes feel the desire to grab something fragile and - not out of anger, just because it would be funny - hurl it across the room to watch it explode.

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Sometimes I just space out for a period of time and completely forget that I'm breathing. Then when I snap out of it, I kind of breathe deeply because I thought I forgot to breathe.

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Find something on this site that you actually do not do, and think how weird the person who wrote that must be.

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find a nice photograph of food from the web and post it on fb just to watch my retard friends make a big deal out of it.

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When watching a heavy action movie and you suddenly start thinking about how much it would cost to repair the damages made in the movie.

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Be talking to someone about something random, then a few days later or so... something very relevant to that happens, then you think to yourself "I'm sure I can tell the future"... I'm very confident that, that is just me...

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I'm paranoid of EVERYTHING. When I enter a room, I inspect it for cameras. When I'm in the bathroom I cover all the cameras on my iPod, Phone, etc. When I do something I'm not supposed to do on the computer (such as download music for free), I cover the webcam to assure the government can't see me. I control my thoughts 24/7 at fear that someone will read my thoughts. I have a strict feeling the someone is always watching me. I fear subliminal advertisements also. To sum everything up you could just read the first part. I DONT TRUST ANYTHING OR ANYONE! I'm Not sure if anyone else is as paranoid as I am...

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Wally,you mean Obamney is the only choice?

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I ejaculate fire and glory

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.