Think about past screw ups, then cross my eyes thinking to myself "I'm such a F---ing retard."

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I always open up another tab on my browser, just in case I accidentally exit, so my computer can warn me that I will close 2 tabs.

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Making "X's" with your fingernail on bug bites to get rid of them.

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Reflection and deep thoughts about the origin of life and the universe when showering

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After eating a lot of junk food begin to fear that i'm going to get diabetes.

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I really enjoy taking a shit and dont really know why.

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Become paranoid that this is not the real world, and instead is some coma induced dream.

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When bored in class.. I catch eyes with someone across the room and look away fast, then act "cool" for the next 10 minutes because I still think they're looking at me...

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When I go to the bathroom I put toilet paper over my penis and pretend its a ghost

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After watching a movie, always walk out the theatre feeling like a total bad ass

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Only taking half a biscuit because it makes you feel bad and then taking another half of a different biscuit.

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Clenching your teeth subconsciously, then wondering why your teeth hurt so much afterwards.

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I precisley fold toilet paper , so that I can unfold it and use the other side

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When talking to someone you sometimes start with the middle of a story through the end, complete with random details that seem totally unrelated to them, and THEN you remember to tell the beginning (which is the part that actually relates to what they were talking about).

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Find something on this site that you actually do not do, and think how weird the person who wrote that must be.

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eat chicken, lamb anything with bones with a knife and fork while avoiding using your hands because it makes them dirty

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sit on the toilet when taking a crap and play my iPod or laptop at the same time for something to do.

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Checking your phone for a text when you know you don't have one. Matt

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getting a random wedgie when everybody is looking at me

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Think of the best come-backs ever, a few seconds after the time to use them would be.

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apparently you turn or twist everything to tight like a sink or a bottlecap ect. "i cant open the bottle of fu***ng coke becase you "

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try to cut corners in my house and hit the wall

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Sing really loudly and think you hear someone come in. yell "hello" for five minutes before singing again.

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blow nose. look at kleenex.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.