When you were in elementary school you thought people laughed at Uranus because it sounds kinda like urine and then wondered why it was so funny; the two only sound remotely alike.

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When I am in a car i always think there is massive swords coming out the edge of the car and make everything the same length up

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I look for comments in this site that are on or close to 0 so that when i like or dislike them, i make a difference to the outcome :)

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Scratch my ass/armpit and HAVE to smell it.

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Pee in the shower.

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Get angry at someone for not knowing something I haven't told them about.

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Not laughing at funny things on T.V. because nobody is around.

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When I'm at the checkout and paying with my card, I try to put my PIN in the card machine before the cashier has a chance to tell me to do it.

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Still can't walk on cracks. If I step on the crack with one foot, the other has to as well.

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Try to think of as many as my female friends as literally possible while masturbating. Rapid Fire envisioning each one I can think of - regardless of their attractiveness - taking my load in one place or another, until I actually cum.

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Whenever I read a book, in my head it all takes place at my own house, or some other familiar location.

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whenever there is a person I really, really hate, I imagion them dying in a cruel and painful way.

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When the car ride is silent, I wink with my right eye when I pass a sign on the right, and the opposite for the left. And then when there's a double yellow line, I close my eyes.

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Wish that Mexicans would go ruin their own country instead of ruin ours.

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When my friends talk bout a show they ask did u see the one where they did this and I nod even thow I have no idea what they're talking about

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thinking that the 'writing comments procedure' on this website is extremely irritating.

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when on long car rides look out the window imagineing stick figures running

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look around my house for something to do for what feels like an hour then look back at a clock to realize thats its only been 4 minutes

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Music is ALWAYS playing in my head. I can't go a day without noticing that the whole time a song is just burned in my brain, playing over and over. Is this okay? Im pretty sure im the only one...

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When I let water out the bath I swish the water so it makes a little whirlpool

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I sometimes see or think of words and pronounce them differently. ie. Garbage, gar-bah-ge ("ge" like a vibration sound), Target, tar-jhay

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I daydream and consequently spend twenty minutes having a dump

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Naming you're offspring Peter Jankins

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Turn the light off, run, and JUMP into bed. I'm 26.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.