When I'm in a room with other people, no matter who they are, I make myself choose the person I would tolerate the best having sex with just in case of a disaster and we need to procreate.

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I keep thinking a thing is about to fall from the table even though it's not close to the edge

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Bathroom occupied, piss in the kitchen sink.

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I only make the tv volume in multiples of 5.

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I sometimes wonder if im a baby and my whole life is just a big dream

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do you feel that your normal, but you feel that the people around you are being nice to you because your mentally hanicapped

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i make loud noises so before i fart people cant hear it.

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I never let anything go over the toilet when It's open.

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When my friends talk bout a show they ask did u see the one where they did this and I nod even thow I have no idea what they're talking about

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When bored, I often fold pieces of paper to make a little point and poke my fingers/hands with it.

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When your best friend has a certain make/model/color car, you start seeing it everywhere you go.

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Listen to music while browsing the internet, having facebook open in another tab, and randomly you hear facebook message sounds, even though they aren't really there.

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sit in the shower

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Sunday's are making me feel depressed.

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never feel sad enough after being told a sad story

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Turn the light off, run, and JUMP into bed. I'm 26.

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say to my friend do you ever think that someone else is thinking the same thing that they are thinking at this moment in time and then SHYT in there mouth. Normally they gurggle it in their throat, before swallowing it and making a pedo face, and sometimes i bike naked and shit on cars with diorrea so it explodes on the windows.

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watch old shows I used to watch when I was younger

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Walking past a light switch, but miss when try to turn the lights on so you just keep walking instead.

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Not sure if im holding on to fart or shit

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http://www.todayswhatsappstatus.com/

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Spinning around to get dizzy, then spinning the other way to try and undo it.

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I daydream and consequently spend twenty minutes having a dump

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Try to think of as many as my female friends as literally possible while masturbating. Rapid Fire envisioning each one I can think of - regardless of their attractiveness - taking my load in one place or another, until I actually cum.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.