I don't cut a conversation on the phone short just because I have to use the "facilities". I've mastered the art of being as far away from the toilet while flushing and sprinting out of the bathroom.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

i open the cuboard door tosee if theres anything to eat and if theres nothing there i close it and go to the fridge if theres nothing there i go back to the cuboard =)

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Whenever I read a book, in my head it all takes place at my own house, or some other familiar location.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

On Youtube. Moving the mouse cursor over the video thumbnails thinking it will display different snap shots from the video. And realizing what a guy I am...

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Flush the toilet right before done peeing so when you're done, the toilet and your pee has been flushed.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

I have an unhealthy obsession with and so always talk about Penge North Korea beige mauve and medium density fiberboard. This explains why I'm such a popular guy

thumb_up thumb_down -53

Download a new app, and say to myself I'll never stop playing it. Play it for 2 hours and forget about it.

thumb_up thumb_down -95

in the morning the first thing I do is pick my nose n eat it n then I smell my discharge

thumb_up thumb_down -139

Secretly open a packet of something or spray some deodorant in a shop to check what it looks/feels/smells like. Then put it back and pick up the one behind because you just used/opened the one you were just holding.

thumb_up thumb_down -153

Try to make a sound described in a book or text (like a gasp or a gargle)

thumb_up thumb_down

put an excessive amount of lead in your pencil

thumb_up thumb_down -6

I always think I have special powers

thumb_up thumb_down -20

When an awkward situation arises, pull out my phone and aimlessly flip through the apps to pretend I'm busy doing something

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Sitting next to a banana called James

thumb_up thumb_down -48

do you feel that your normal, but you feel that the people around you are being nice to you because your mentally hanicapped

thumb_up thumb_down -48

When i want to write a joke on anti jokes.com i laugh at my friends instead!

thumb_up thumb_down -68

If I drop a piece of candy on the floor, I have to drop another piece so it won,t be lonely

thumb_up thumb_down -82

Pretending you don't know that much about something because other people might think it would be wierd if you did. Ex: if you you knew someone's exact birthdate and you were discussing it with some one and you where like ya he looks a little older he's probably in his mid 40s or early 50s instead of just admitting you know there exact age.

thumb_up thumb_down -104

Okay so probably like everyone else, when Schapelle Corby was found with drugs on her in bali I thought she was innocent but now since she was let out of the prison I am wondering if she did do it?

thumb_up thumb_down -106

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

thumb_up thumb_down -106

i noticed that a lot of people pronounce "LOL" like roll. Am i the only one that reads it as L. O. L. (el oh el) ????

thumb_up thumb_down -136

Reach past the first two or three slices of bread to get the better, fresher bread towards the middle.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

when u were younger and closed the fridge door super slowly 2 c when the light turned off

thumb_up thumb_down +35

At night when alone in my bed...I sometimes pretend like I got hit by a car or something, and my loved one is there with me...and I act out my last words...and how I would act. I've done this occasionally since I was 5. With different scenario's. Schmee

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.