When I go to use my laptop if my cat is sleeping in my chair I would use it somewhere else and leave her alone.

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I have never disliked any video on YouTube with not many views ( no matter how bad it is ) because I feel bad for the uploader.

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Check my underwear for any sh!t from farts (yes, sometimes my shit comes with a fart) captcha: royal flush

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I always cry when I pray.

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Have to suddenly poop while shopping (mainly in Wal-Mart), but don't feel like traveling far to the restroom. So I kneel down in whatever aisle I'm in, casually shove my heel up my butt, and pick up some random item from the shelf and pretend to be interested in it. Finally, when the poop is secure in my butt, I'll put the item back and continue my shopping.

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When im going from one room to the next, i try and get into the other room before the door to the last room closes. If i do, I've won.

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When I see someones comment has alot of dislikes , I add on to it .

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I avoid my wealthy but cool relatives because I don't want them to think I want money

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When i want to write a joke on anti jokes.com i laugh at my friends instead!

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Think to myself "If I would have stuck to my diet I would be at my goal weight by now"

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Okay so probably like everyone else, when Schapelle Corby was found with drugs on her in bali I thought she was innocent but now since she was let out of the prison I am wondering if she did do it?

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when u were younger and closed the fridge door super slowly 2 c when the light turned off

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When I'm at the checkout and paying with my card, I try to put my PIN in the card machine before the cashier has a chance to tell me to do it.

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I type out something I think is funny, then wonder if people will think I'm weird and erase it.

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I don't cut a conversation on the phone short just because I have to use the "facilities". I've mastered the art of being as far away from the toilet while flushing and sprinting out of the bathroom.

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I take pains to be Anti-Democrat and Anti-Republican. Because both parties are really gross money & career machines beholden to industry. I really am middle-of-the-road on lots of issues. even though I don't understand what the fuck makes an intelligent conservative tick. but I may just be biased because it's all neo-cons on the news. idk.

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Wake up, unnaturally hungry, make meal fit for a king.

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Still can't walk on cracks. If I step on the crack with one foot, the other has to as well.

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Sunday's are making me feel depressed.

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Wearing cheap CZ rings to either stop guys hitting on me or pretend I'm engaged.

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I always wonder if anyone has a crush on me.

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Constantly refreshing the Captcha for fear that It'll be wrong and I have to redo everything I did.

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Getting that huge shiver when you take a really good pee.

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worry about your eyebrows sneaking their way up and making wrinkles on your forehead

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.