Before I sing in the car, I always have to make sure I haven’t accidently butt-dialed anyone. –Ikka

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Bathroom occupied, piss in the kitchen sink.

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I suck my shirt without realizing im doing it until people tell me.

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When you say something you think is funny but it turns out that it's only funny in your head so once you say it there's this moment of awkwardness and everyone else probably just forgets about it but it haunts you for the rest of your life. ~

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when watching a movie in a big screen cinema, i unconsciously look at the bottom of the screen, midway through the movie, expecting to see a time/track/scroll bar. as if it was VLC media player.

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when on long car rides look out the window imagineing stick figures running

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Instead of scratching my balls with my hand I rub them vigorously on the bed

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When you were in elementary school you thought people laughed at Uranus because it sounds kinda like urine and then wondered why it was so funny; the two only sound remotely alike.

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"????????? ???? ?????! ??? ?? ???????? UH1 HUEY!!! ??? ?? ???????? ??????? ??????????? ?????, ????????? ?? ??????? ? ??????????????? ???????!!! ?????? ????, ???????????????? ?? ???????, ?? ?????? ??????? ?? ????! ???? ???????????? ???????, ????? ??????? ???? ??? ?????????, ? ??????????? ?????, ??? ????????? ??????? ??????????? ?????!!! ? ??? ?? ????? ???? ??????? ??????????? ??????????. ???????? ????????,???? ????, ??? ??????? ?????? ??? ????? ??? ????? ???? ? ??????. "

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Spinning around to get dizzy, then spinning the other way to try and undo it.

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Pubic hair wishes... While on the toilet you try to pull out a hair... If it comes out close your eyes and make a wish....and throw it into the toilet... Flush... Repeat!

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get so shitfaced you wake up in a closet with piss everywhere

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Go to websites like this during school and laugh at the things I read. All around me other students are actually working and looking at me.

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I eat ass

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Pretending you don't know that much about something because other people might think it would be wierd if you did. Ex: if you you knew someone's exact birthdate and you were discussing it with some one and you where like ya he looks a little older he's probably in his mid 40s or early 50s instead of just admitting you know there exact age.

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Buy something and try to save it for an event of some kind and end up failing to do so, every darn time too.

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Rereading a text message 25 times before you send it to make sure it makes sense.

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Wait until there is nobody in the bathroom and then fart really really loud. Also I flip my pillow every 10 minutes so my head is on the cold side. (try it some time)

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choose which piece of cereal in the cereal bowl i should eat last.

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Smelling your armpits to see if you smell and then disguising at as yawn/stretch

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Touching your nipples at night wondering if anyone else wanted to touch them all day :)

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I let everyone know I'm a lesbian as soon as I meet them, ('cause I wouldn't want to continue talking to someone who hates gays).

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When i play a video game and make some stupid noobish action including suiciding or playing in a lame way, i make sure that if somehow someone sees my screen, he/she notices why i do so.

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thinking that the 'writing comments procedure' on this website is extremely irritating.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.