Check my underwear for any sh!t from farts (yes, sometimes my shit comes with a fart) captcha: royal flush

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do you feel that your normal, but you feel that the people around you are being nice to you because your mentally hanicapped

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Sitting next to a banana called James

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When I watch a movie that terrifies me, I usually find myself sitting on the sofa with a kitchen knife in my hand at the end of the movie.

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I always wonder if anyone has a crush on me.

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Spinning around to get dizzy, then spinning the other way to try and undo it.

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When my friends talk bout a show they ask did u see the one where they did this and I nod even thow I have no idea what they're talking about

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When I go to use my laptop if my cat is sleeping in my chair I would use it somewhere else and leave her alone.

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Take out all the marshmallows in a bowl of Lucky Charms, eat the "cat food" (the dry cereal that looks like dry kitty food!), then put the marshmallows back in the milk and eat them!

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When the car ride is silent, I wink with my right eye when I pass a sign on the right, and the opposite for the left. And then when there's a double yellow line, I close my eyes.

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look around my house for something to do for what feels like an hour then look back at a clock to realize thats its only been 4 minutes

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When I let water out the bath I swish the water so it makes a little whirlpool

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When im going from one room to the next, i try and get into the other room before the door to the last room closes. If i do, I've won.

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I sometimes see or think of words and pronounce them differently. ie. Garbage, gar-bah-ge ("ge" like a vibration sound), Target, tar-jhay

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get really embarrassed when i leave the book i read when i poop on the bathroom counter and someone uses the bathroom.

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I talk to myself when I'm alone

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After going to the bathroom, flush the toilet than hurry out of the bathroom and walk fast past a certain line going across the floor or make an imaginary line on the floor before the toilet fully flushes.

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I seriously contemplate what my theme song would be. I imagine it would have no words and a slight Mission Impossible influence.

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See a ridiculously hot girl and wonder to myself "who is the guy who gets to have sex with her. And why does she like him?" As if that can help me bag an equally hotter girl.

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Smile like a damn dork when I watch romantic movies.

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Secretly think that Flo from the Progressive commercials is bangable.

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Go to websites like this during school and laugh at the things I read. All around me other students are actually working and looking at me.

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Before I go to sleep, I imagine what it would be like dating a really hot actor or singer and think of dramatic scenarios that could happen.

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Search "sex" whenever you see a dictionary.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.