when watching a movie in a big screen cinema, i unconsciously look at the bottom of the screen, midway through the movie, expecting to see a time/track/scroll bar. as if it was VLC media player.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Wake up, unnaturally hungry, make meal fit for a king.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Scared to flush the tolite at friends houses in fear that i will wake someone up of break the tolite.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Sunday's are making me feel depressed.

thumb_up thumb_down -47

Naming you're offspring Peter Jankins

thumb_up thumb_down -133

Search "sex" whenever you see a dictionary.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

I always have to google the name of this website, because I always put the words in the wrong consecution.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

After going to the bathroom, flush the toilet than hurry out of the bathroom and walk fast past a certain line going across the floor or make an imaginary line on the floor before the toilet fully flushes.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

When winking, I feel as if I have to wink with the other eye to be fair to both eyes.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Suddenly thinking that this is all a dream, and having to pinch yourself to make sure it isn´t. Or is it?

thumb_up thumb_down -26

On Youtube. Moving the mouse cursor over the video thumbnails thinking it will display different snap shots from the video. And realizing what a guy I am...

thumb_up thumb_down -28

When you are looking over someones shoulder and they look at you thinking you are staring at them so you suddenly turn your head

thumb_up thumb_down -34

When I let water out the bath I swish the water so it makes a little whirlpool

thumb_up thumb_down -44

I put big spaces in between comments

thumb_up thumb_down -46

Clench your butt super hard to slowly let out a fart thinking no one will know.

thumb_up thumb_down -50

When im going from one room to the next, i try and get into the other room before the door to the last room closes. If i do, I've won.

thumb_up thumb_down -58

I always wonder if anyone has a crush on me.

thumb_up thumb_down -66

oh snap, i got a boner. hope nobody notices

thumb_up thumb_down -98

When I get a worksheet or a piece of paper with BIG TITLES I immediately shade in all of the gaps in the o's, p's, d's and all other 'hole letters'. And then I start shading in all the words when I finish.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Try to make a sound described in a book or text (like a gasp or a gargle)

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Wonder if certain people can read my mind... start thinking weird stuff and try to stop.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

When the car ride is silent, I wink with my right eye when I pass a sign on the right, and the opposite for the left. And then when there's a double yellow line, I close my eyes.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Not expecting anyone to come over, some one knocks on the front door, mute the TV and hope they just go away.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

DAS RITE MODERFOCKER! NOWUN MESSIS WIF FIRLUPE!!' (throws wine in face)

thumb_up thumb_down -51

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.