Check my underwear for any sh!t from farts (yes, sometimes my shit comes with a fart) captcha: royal flush

I use two pillows as I sleep, but I don't put them under my head, I put my head in between them.

Find it impossible to get rid of the itch on the bottom of my feet or my palms when they're itchy

Okay so probably like everyone else, when Schapelle Corby was found with drugs on her in bali I thought she was innocent but now since she was let out of the prison I am wondering if she did do it?

I talk to myself while playing games so I don't feel lonley!

Bathroom occupied, piss in the kitchen sink.

Awkward moment... Pretend to send a text.

I always think I have special powers

KICK THE CAN

Say 'she's not here' when someone that I don't know calls and asks for me.

get home from work and masturbate instantly

After waking up from being extremely intoxicated the night before, i check my phone and ALL my accounts on the internet to make sure i didnt make an ass of myself.

sit in the shower

Spinning around to get dizzy, then spinning the other way to try and undo it.

i just sit there thinking, how is it not butter?

When they say the name of the movie in the movie i get excited o.O

when watching a movie in a big screen cinema, i unconsciously look at the bottom of the screen, midway through the movie, expecting to see a time/track/scroll bar. as if it was VLC media player.

Drop something down the side of the couch, say that you'll get it in a minute and then forget about it

When the car ride is silent, I wink with my right eye when I pass a sign on the right, and the opposite for the left. And then when there's a double yellow line, I close my eyes.

Zoning out while looking at something and then trying to find the spot you were looking at when you're out of the zone but you can't find it.

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

http://www.todayswhatsappstatus.com/

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

i noticed that a lot of people pronounce "LOL" like roll. Am i the only one that reads it as L. O. L. (el oh el) ????

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.