I sometimes have bad dreams that for some reason I don't want to wake up from because I just want to see what happens next

thumb_up thumb_down +9

When you get in trouble, think of what you could have said or done so you could've gotten away with it.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Think someone's watching me so I do cool stuff to impress them just in case they are

thumb_up thumb_down -49

Secretly think that Flo from the Progressive commercials is bangable.

thumb_up thumb_down -51

When I watch a movie that terrifies me, I usually find myself sitting on the sofa with a kitchen knife in my hand at the end of the movie.

thumb_up thumb_down -57

Only I CAN TYPE FUCKlNG FUCKlNG FUCKlNG AS MANY FUCKlNG TIMES I FUCKlNG WANT! Moral the friendly r*pist: FUCKlNG COOL!

thumb_up thumb_down -67

when i listen to music in my earphones, i always pretend its me performing the song to an audience.

thumb_up thumb_down -77

I sometimes see or think of words and pronounce them differently. ie. Garbage, gar-bah-ge ("ge" like a vibration sound), Target, tar-jhay

thumb_up thumb_down -81

get really embarrassed when i leave the book i read when i poop on the bathroom counter and someone uses the bathroom.

thumb_up thumb_down -91

When it's 12:59 or 4:59 or something:59, I don't let myself blink/breathe until it's 1:00 or 5:00 or something:00. Anyone?

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Enjoy picking off scabs, thick skin around your nails, your nails, or the thick peeling skin left from a blister. Admit it, you love it.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

I have mixed emotions when I drop a piece of food on the ground, like a chicken nugget, M&M, scoop of ice cream, etc - because part of me thinks it is sad because its only goal in life was to be eaten... but then the other part of me is happy for it, because it is possible that it *didn't* want to be eaten and has just made a successful escape. O_o

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Hang something small in front of the webcam, in case someone is secretly watching me.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Read for hours... then hear a narrative for everything you do after you stop reading. for ex: "Jen gets out of the car, shutting it with a loud bang. She walks towards the house, noticing the dead squirrel in the road."

thumb_up thumb_down -30

While going to sleep, you turn the pillow downside-up several times to find a cooler surface.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Scared to flush the tolite at friends houses in fear that i will wake someone up of break the tolite.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Wish that Mexicans would go ruin their own country instead of ruin ours.

thumb_up thumb_down -52

Read weird posts like this one on the HorseHead Network.

thumb_up thumb_down -66

I yawn on command… and hate it. –Ikka

thumb_up thumb_down -118

Legally changing your name to Peter Jankins just cuz

thumb_up thumb_down -138

I put my finger in jars of jam/yoghurt/honey etc then lick the finger and repeat and hope nobody see's me.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

When in class, hoping that I do not get boner right before bell rings/called up.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Sometimes when im in my bed and trying to fall asleep, i don´t want to open my eyes in case there is a murderer standing before my bed.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

after having a hot shower I sometimes just sit in my room wearing just a towel

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.