Hearing someone say something but saying "what" because you need more time to think of an answer

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I wonder do females have morning wood equivalent?

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When I am walking at night, I see a slight shadow behind me for a second, I walk faster, I see the shadow again, I think it is some kind of scary monster and then I decide to run for my life. When I get back home, I realize the shadow is my shadow.

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I put big spaces in between comments

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.don't like something because being scared that it appears on my wall.

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Put toilet paper on the seat in my own house.

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Search "sex" whenever you see a dictionary.

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whenever you walk into the bathroom with your phone/laptop/electronic device you stay sitting on the toilet even though you are done because you are so engaged with whatever you are doing

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When in class, hoping that I do not get boner right before bell rings/called up.

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I can't drink while I'm walking I have to stop.

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When something you're sat on makes a noise that sounds like a FART. So you try and do the noise again, to make sure people are aware that the noise was the chair and not you!

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draw pictures on the mirror from the shower steam

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thinking that the 'writing comments procedure' on this website is extremely irritating.

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Massive hang-over. Say out loud and promise I will never drink like that again. Next time drink atleast as much as the last time.

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When a song comes on that i hate on the radio, i sing along with it because i know the lyrics. (Example: something by Justtin bieber D:)

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Say 'she's not here' when someone that I don't know calls and asks for me.

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Go into a card shop, laugh hysterically at the funny ones, then leave. Then whilst walking down the street, you think of them again and burst out laughing. This is highly embarrassing when you're alone!

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Living in the shadow of an atheletic friend, and secretly wanting to beat them up just to prove that you're as good as they are.

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Listen to music while browsing the internet, having facebook open in another tab, and randomly you hear facebook message sounds, even though they aren't really there.

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Look at just about ANYTHING you see in the context of a zombie apocalypse. Example: strategizing escape routes and barricade points while you're walking down the hallway in school, or looking at something ordinary, like a baseball bat, and thinking, 'I could bash some zombie brains with that'

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Your mom. Just kidding everyone does her.

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When I'm cooking, I mumble everything I'm doing under my breath like I'm in a cooking show and I'm talking to the audience.

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Sometimes, after I say "bye" to a person on facebook, I wait a few seconds before I log off so that it seems like I said "bye" to other people too. Because I'm just that popular.

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I only make the tv volume in multiples of 5.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.