fist myself to the point of unconsciousness whilst masturbating to the speeches of Hitler

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Before drinking the actual soft drink, I drink the fizz as fast as I can.

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Buy tons of movies and only watch them once. Rarely buy books and reread them a million times.

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When I'm bored in school I always imagine the teacher asks me something and my response is starting to sing a song. Somewhen some of my friends sing along with me. Then the whole class sings this song. We run out of classroom into the hallways and every other pupil comes out their classroom to see what's happening. Then They all sing along with me. We run out of school and sing and dance like in a musical. Then I actually remind myself, its impossible that every student knows the lyrics of the song I'm just thinking of and get depressed again.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <<

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When I notice that I have just breathed in/out, for the next minute or so I feel like I have to make a conscious effort to keep breathing.

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I hate when people say for example,if something is $3.99 they say its four dollars.

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Whenever I hear someones name being announced on a p.a., in a store for example....I say out loud 'never heard of him/her'

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When walking on stairs, always counting how many of them there are.

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Whenever there is a volume button on something i have to make sure its on a number 5 ie: 0,5,10,15

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im going to kill that person and get away with it

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I practice my signature on a piece of paper over and over again. Even though my signature has never changed.

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When going to the bathroom, lock it and when trying to unlock and don't succeed immediately... ITS A TRAP! I'M LOCKED IN MY OWN BATHROOM!!

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I can't help but wonder why people write things on web sites and don't bother checking their spelling. Now they look like an idiot no matter how funny or interesting it might have been.

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Wonder if life is just a dream then get a creepy feeling and immediately think happier thoughts.

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sometimes i wonder how it would be to think in another language and i try but cant

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Stick my hand all the way to the bottom of a tub of grease.

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Poop naked.

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The girl I like has just managed to transfer her consciousness into my mind, now being to hear my every thought and see everything I do. Just. Act. Cool.

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Try to use my "Brain Power" to pick up things when I am too lazy to get up and get them.

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I make a mental note NOT to buy the product or service if I feel they are trying to brainwash me with their ads.

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When climbing onto an escalator, I cannot just step on it and go, I have to mentally prepare myself and time my steps to get on, especially if it's going down, cause I'm terrified I will fall off... I usually end up irritating the people behind me trying to get on, as it takes me almost 10 to 15 seconds to find the right step.. And also, I cannot touch the escalator's sides.

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Whenever I am in a dark room at night, and there is a window with blinds with a light shining through, I stand in front of it and pretend I am wearing a striped prison jumpsuit.

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Dance in the car just so the person you like will see you and be like "Aw, cute" but then they don't even see you so you stop...

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.