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Things You Think Only You Do
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Mix up "I'm starving," "I'm freezing," and "I have to pee," in my head, and then say them out loud the wrong way, in times of extreme starving/freezing/needing-to-pee desperation.
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-69
when you mouth words (but saying them out loud) when someone can't hear you
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-83
When I make croissants from the Pillsbury can, I'll take one of the little triangles and eat it, because I like the consistency of dough, and i like the fizzy feeling of the yeast on my tongue.
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-95
Wonder if life is just a dream then get a creepy feeling and immediately think happier thoughts.
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+26
Getting bored when a page is loading and scrolling the wheel on your mouse back and forth one click.
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+6
Stick my hand all the way to the bottom of a tub of grease.
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I forget I turned the toaster on and jump when it goes off.
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-8
Wipe drink can with shirt after someone (mainly father) has had a sip.
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-10
Has anyone else ever wondered why the women in shows and movies lie with the blanket covering them after apparently having sex with the other person.
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-12
Pee in the shower
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-12
I imagine that there are lines coming out from things and I don't step on the lines (columns, buildings, walls, corners, etc.)
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-22
sometimes when i fart i feel like i pooped a little in my underwear but tell myself ''no i didn't'' but feel poopy until i check.
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-22
I don't thumb down any submissions because then I am just as bad as the people who thumb down mine
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-24
When I go to somewhere like France I always wittily comment to my friend " oh look at all those bloody foreigners as I have always thought they were tougher on immigrants
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-26
Thinking you could be in a "Truman Show" style scenario and scanning areas of your house and possessions for tiny little cameras and microphones.
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-26
When you sit down to use the toilet, start, and then realize that the window is open and people can hear you.You then either search for something to mask the sound or proceed to relieve yourself by making as little noise as possible (ultimately failing)
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-26
Write my own music without literally writing it on something even though I'm only grade 3
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-28
Watching a movie with bugs in it and instantly feeling that shivery 'holy sh*t there are bugs on me' feeling.
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-28
Reading these, realizing that you don't do some of the things on the top of the list, and wondering if you're weird.
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-32
Only read the shortest sentences on "Things You Think Only You Do". More than 2 sentences I skip.
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-32
Stare off into space in the middle of a conversation
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-34
Saying an awkward word enough times so that it doesn't sound like a real word anymore
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-40
Watch the same movies over and over
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-40
Every new years eve I like to watch the date on my computer change all three the day, the month, and the year
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-44
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Things You Think Only You Do
A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.