Only read the shortest sentences on "Things You Think Only You Do". More than 2 sentences I skip.

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When I'm running a bath I sometimes sit and look at myself in the mirror and act out conversations with people I've never talked to or celebrities, and when I say something that sounds good I'll repeat it over and over again until I nail huge emotions on my face.

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When i'm home, I pretend i'm famous!

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Playing with a tiny piece of loose skin in the middle of my upper lip.

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Put toilet paper in the toilet before I'm going to take a shit, so that the toilet won't get dirty.

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only turning the TV volume to numbers ending in 5

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Get to lazy to stand up in the shower so I sit down in the shower

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When I drop something, I stand there and watch it fall, I stand still because I'm afraid that I'll maybe mess up something else, instead of picking it up quickly. Am I the only one? ;)

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When my cat follows me, I pretend we're a pack or some sort of gang and i would be the leader.

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This song will not come out of my head!

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Use é instead of e to spell Pokémon

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Moisturize "down there" after a really drying wipe session.

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you turn the dial on your microwave until it reaches as far as it can go

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Sittig on a table donating sperm to my friend gabe

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I like wet humping better than f*cking. but sometimes it slips in anyway, and it's that's pretty enjoyable too. and mt girlfriend is cool with. ... so it's actualy pretty whatevs either way. but wet humping is my jam.

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When I'm in the shower, I'm afraid something might try to kill me so I shower with my glasses on.

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wonder who wrote these things

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something happens with a person that u were close to but then they become an asshole, u get mad, and when u stop talking feel really depressed even though u hate them

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Play Minecraft

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chew on the side of my teeth

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Whenever I hear someones name being announced on a p.a., in a store for example....I say out loud 'never heard of him/her'

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Play poly-rhythmic drum beats along with my turn signal on my car.

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Watch scary movies even though your afraid of the dark.

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I don't like Winter. Because I'm scared that when we use the heater, our house will catch on fire.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.