- Things You Think Only You Do

when riding home on my bike with music on pretenend im in a race with no1 and commentate on iend get really exccited on the last straight especielly when a rocky soundtrack song comes on

I like wet humping better than f*cking. but sometimes it slips in anyway, and it's that's pretty enjoyable too. and mt girlfriend is cool with. ... so it's actualy pretty whatevs either way. but wet humping is my jam.

Listen to song and think of a great montage that would go with it.

wen on this website go look at the most disliked

I chew around the center of carrots.

when you're microwaving something and you have to pee, you run to the bathroom. then you run back to see if there is still time left before the "bomb" goes off.

Being afraid to close your eyes when you're washing your hair in the shower because you think a murderer will be right there when you open your eyes again. That or Scared to shower when your home alone at night.

Pick your dead skin then eat it.

after you've been in a fight i usually think up some epic move i could've done instead.

Call out the mistakes I see drivers make in front of me.

When walking into a smelly bathroom, hold your breath so you don't have to breathe in the poo air.

Wave my hand at automatic doors just as they open pretending that I have Jedi powers

Hit the enter key really hard when finishing a long piece of text that you have just written.

Has anyone else ever wondered why the women in shows and movies lie with the blanket covering them after apparently having sex with the other person.

if your behind glass or a window and you see a group outside, imagine their conversation.

I am such a coward. When I'm going to have an argument or complain to someone, I think of the beat ever retort, but when it comes down to it I say "why are you so mean" or " why don't you just leave me alone for once" or something like that. ( Yes I get picked on, cos I'm the smartest in our class)

Decide to think about important things in the shower, but continually lose the train of thought and eventually give up.

Sometimes, when I'm alone and it's dark outside, I like to cover my body in petroleum jelly and pretend to be a slug.

I have a feeling that life is a Video Game for another Universe. When the player looks at their computer screen, they see what I see. They control everything I do. Like The Sims games. Everyone else is either other players in a multiplayer server, or they are are all fake, computer players.

If I turn in a circle I have to turn the other way to balance it out and feel even!

I know it is pointless but still hope to get THUMBS UP

Make hand gestures when talking on phone

get really paranoid when you're in a shop's changing room and try and make sure the curtain is fully closed so nobody can see in

When I wipe after taking a poo I always get excited when there is no extra poo to be wiped off...yea...don't judge

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.