Put toilet paper in the toilet before I'm going to take a shit, so that the toilet won't get dirty.

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when making thing only you think you do you never read the terms of service

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only turning the TV volume to numbers ending in 5

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Get to lazy to stand up in the shower so I sit down in the shower

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When I drop something, I stand there and watch it fall, I stand still because I'm afraid that I'll maybe mess up something else, instead of picking it up quickly. Am I the only one? ;)

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When my cat follows me, I pretend we're a pack or some sort of gang and i would be the leader.

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Moisturize "down there" after a really drying wipe session.

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Use é instead of e to spell Pokémon

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you turn the dial on your microwave until it reaches as far as it can go

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Sittig on a table donating sperm to my friend gabe

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I like wet humping better than f*cking. but sometimes it slips in anyway, and it's that's pretty enjoyable too. and mt girlfriend is cool with. ... so it's actualy pretty whatevs either way. but wet humping is my jam.

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wonder who wrote these things

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When I'm in the shower, I'm afraid something might try to kill me so I shower with my glasses on.

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something happens with a person that u were close to but then they become an asshole, u get mad, and when u stop talking feel really depressed even though u hate them

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Play Minecraft

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chew on the side of my teeth

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Go up/down the stairs in 10 steps exactly. Talk to an imaginary girlfriend when I'm guilty of something, and she helps me out and holds me till I fall asleep.

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When you are in a car and a sad song comes on look out the window and pretend you are in a movie.

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Whenever I hear someones name being announced on a p.a., in a store for example....I say out loud 'never heard of him/her'

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Watch scary movies even though your afraid of the dark.

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I don't like Winter. Because I'm scared that when we use the heater, our house will catch on fire.

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When going to the bathroom, lock it and when trying to unlock and don't succeed immediately... ITS A TRAP! I'M LOCKED IN MY OWN BATHROOM!!

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I can't help but wonder why people write things on web sites and don't bother checking their spelling. Now they look like an idiot no matter how funny or interesting it might have been.

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When boarding the escalator, I select a specific step before getting on causing a slight queue.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.