When I wipe after taking a poo I always get excited when there is no extra poo to be wiped off...yea...don't judge

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Make the water from your shower shoot from your finger and pretend to be a water-bender.

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I have to put the radio volume in multiples of three and my daughter has to put it in multiples of five so when we are together it either has to be on 15 or 30.

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Thinking you could be in a "Truman Show" style scenario and scanning areas of your house and possessions for tiny little cameras and microphones.

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check for spiders under the toilet seat before taking a dump

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Wherever I drink something, I count how many times I swallow it, and I feel weird if it's not a multiple of 5. I will get more of the drink and drink it, even if I'm not thirsty, just to make my life seem a little more complete...PLEASE tell me I'm not the only one?

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When I go to somewhere like France I always wittily comment to my friend " oh look at all those bloody foreigners as I have always thought they were tougher on immigrants

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Stepping on people's feet when I approach to kiss/hug/say hi to them.

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Smoking a cigarette on the toilet and then accidentally ashing directly into your panties. Everytime.

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only turning the TV volume to numbers ending in 5

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Look at just about ANYTHING you see in the context of a zombie apocalypse. Example: strategizing escape routes and barricade points while you're walking down the hallway in school, or looking at something ordinary, like a baseball bat, and thinking, 'I could bash some zombie brains with that'

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If I see the same model of vehicle as mine in a parking lot, I get overly excited if I manage to get a parking spot next to it. Extra points for same color or type (i.e. quad cab vs regular cab).

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It's hot but I still have on covers

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When you accidentally like get something on your hand so you go to wash it off but feel compelled to wash your other hand too even if it's not dirty

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When you can feel yourself blushing so you pretend to be preoccupied with something else.

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i feel relived after i prick and see that hard-white thinggy that oozes outside my annoying acne.

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Pronounce hors d'oeuvres 'whores-dev-ers' thinking I'm so witty.

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Eat ice by itself

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Look to the right, and see nothing. Look to the left, and see nothing. Look to the right again, and see the chick from the ring (or some scary shit) standing there.

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sing like a pro in da shower

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I have an unhealthy obsession with and so always talk about Penge North Korea beige mauve and medium density fiberboard. This explains why I'm such a popular guy

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Get really annoyed when something interrupts your yawn... then try and force yourself to complete the yawn

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Ever played the sims, then wondered if you were just apart of a game and that maybe someone is controlling YOUR every move? Yeah. Me too.

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when riding home on my bike with music on pretenend im in a race with no1 and commentate on iend get really exccited on the last straight especielly when a rocky soundtrack song comes on

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.