I forget I turned the toaster on and jump when it goes off.

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Pee in the shower

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I have short haircuts so I don't have messed up hair in the morning (It's a real time saver)

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When I'm in the shower I condition my pubes so they get nice and soft.

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i always fall in my imaginations. whenever i think of something, e.g me walking to my room, i'd fall on my way there. what's wrong with me.....

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If I have my computer and I have to do something quietly (because there are other people about) I hear music in heaphones, just so it seems to myself that I'm more discreet, as I can't hear myself.

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I really enjoy spending my birthday alone. I never told anyone that.

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Check the shower before you pee to make sure nothing is waiting there to literally get you with your pants down.

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Feel the bed gets more comfortable the longer you put off getting into bed.

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When realizing i'm being a little bitchy, I laugh and smile right after my sentence to make myself seem a little nicer.

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Thinking you could be in a "Truman Show" style scenario and scanning areas of your house and possessions for tiny little cameras and microphones.

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I don't thumb down any submissions because then I am just as bad as the people who thumb down mine

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check for spiders under the toilet seat before taking a dump

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Hum up and down in pitch because it makes LED displays dance around.

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When you sit down to use the toilet, start, and then realize that the window is open and people can hear you.You then either search for something to mask the sound or proceed to relieve yourself by making as little noise as possible (ultimately failing)

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I wish I can go somewhere where there is no influences trying to get me to buy a product or be a certain way

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Lying in be and pretending you are in a tv show, the characters best friend, playing it out in your mind. Or you dream while awake, and you control it, and you fly to Hollywood and become your faborite celebrities best friend.

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I pick a green crayon from crayon box but it's one of those yellow-greens that look yellow and now my clover will be half yellow forever.

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Talks to yourself in your head then replies to yourself out loud nikki

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play on your game for ten minutes before you realise why you stoppedd the last time

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Smoking a cigarette on the toilet and then accidentally ashing directly into your panties. Everytime.

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I hate being called "buddy".

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Do sex sensations feel exactly the same for the opposite sex.

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Check the lint filter on the dryer every time I walk into the laundry room.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.