Listen to song and think of a great montage that would go with it.

thumb_up thumb_down -61

try not to step on cracks on the sidewalk

thumb_up thumb_down -65

When a stripper sucks you so hard that the tip of your penis gets circumcised

thumb_up thumb_down -67

When driving along in the car, imagining crashing and another car coming into you and the repercussions of it all.

thumb_up thumb_down -73

I used to be the third most useless invention in the world, and now I am so sad, I mean I lost to a square wheel! Moral: On the bright side, ill never be as useless as Rustin Beaver.

thumb_up thumb_down -79

~When you turn around, somebody is already looking at you; something is probably on your face. (I know they look at you because you would look at anybody turning around, but I just hate it)

thumb_up thumb_down -79

Put toilet paper on the seat in my own house.

thumb_up thumb_down -93

Call out the mistakes I see drivers make in front of me.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

When I go to bed, I imagine how I would deal with intruders, then I can't sleep.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

I wonder do females have morning wood equivalent?

thumb_up thumb_down -16

When I’ve got something cooking in the microwave, before actually looking to see how much time is left, I try to guess how much time is left; if I’m correct within 3 seconds on the timer, I actually feel a measure of accomplishment.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

If two cars towing boats were to crash into each other, Would that make it a boating accident?

thumb_up thumb_down -20

after switching lights..i go run as hard as i could do after reaching the bed

thumb_up thumb_down -24

When I wipe after taking a poo I always get excited when there is no extra poo to be wiped off...yea...don't judge

thumb_up thumb_down -24

twirl your penis in a cirlce and make the woo woo sound

thumb_up thumb_down -26

I kick my shoes off, sending them flying to various parts of the room. I then pick them up and place them neatly beside each other

thumb_up thumb_down -26

When reading something on the internet highlighting the words, they don't even have to be what you'r reading just highlighting large sections of the article at random.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

check for spiders under the toilet seat before taking a dump

thumb_up thumb_down -28

You like to think about how your favorite characters would react if you told them that they were fictional.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Sitting on a table at school and looking at the things u only think i do website

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Feeling like no one really "knows" me, but only what they already see/know. Most things about me my family don't know about.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

I sit sideways on the toilet because my bony butt fits better that way.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

In the summer when it's hot, I bring a fan into the bathroom when I take a crap.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Search for blackheads on your arms for hours just because youre bored!

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.