Trying not to fart when laughing is challenging.

When I get the chance, I always nick a chip from my mum's or dad's dinner.

Drink half the water in a water bottle and then swish it around pretending to drown little people inside it.

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In public,try to make eye contact with most people.

forget i left the light on somewhere in the house and when i see it on i think a ghost did it..

I flick my boogers on the carpet knowing that I can just vacuum them up later.

Hatch an escape plan as soon as my date starts to complain about anything.

I practice my signature on a piece of paper over and over again. Even though my signature has never changed.

I don't like Winter. Because I'm scared that when we use the heater, our house will catch on fire.

When I make croissants from the Pillsbury can, I'll take one of the little triangles and eat it, because I like the consistency of dough, and i like the fizzy feeling of the yeast on my tongue.

At school I go along with the norm even though inside I HATE it!!!!

My brother (who is 2 years younger) and I have our own language, consisting of movie quotes and silly stuff we made up when we were little. We speak it with abandon when we're alone, and try as hard as we can to suppress it when we're with a friend. But sometimes some of it slips out, and the friend looks at us like he's the guy who isn't in on the joke; I always get the feeling he or she thinks the two of us are crazy. By the way, if you're the third person in company with two close siblings who are speaking their own secret language, don't ask them to explain or look at them like they're crazy. They're not nuts, and you won't understand, even if they try to explain. Just let it pass.

Call out the mistakes I see drivers make in front of me.

Wave my hand at automatic doors just as they open pretending that I have Jedi powers

I use my mobile as a torch and keep hitting random buttons to keep it alight.

When you're alone in a room and you have to turn on the TV so it's not as silent...

Look at a guy and think that he is a good looking guy, than immidiatly try to think of something else because thats gay.

sit closer to the water so my poop isn't so loud..

I wonder if old women enjoy sex?

While watching a movie, I hold my breath whenever there is a scene with the main character underwater just to see how long i would last in that situation.

take 2 coffes in 2 seconds cause dont remember the first coffee! o.O

On Youtube, while reading comments notice that many people reply angrily to the same person. Wonder what they said that pissed so many people off. Try to find them in earlier posts, but fail. Live the rest of the night in depressive state.

When I'm alone with my pet, sometimes we just sit down and stare at each each other for a minute or two

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.