Vote for the other guy

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Sometimes I would just be thinking to myself and then think of something funny and laugh but I don't share it with anyone else makes me look insane.

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When I'm in the shower, I'm afraid something might try to kill me so I shower with my glasses on.

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Pretending not to hear someone talk to you hoping they wont care enough to repeat themselves so you wont have to talk to them

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Judge a stranger in your mind (God, they're ugly/fat etc.) then wonder if they heard you thinking it.

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Before posting a comment when you need several consecutive tries to type the words in the box because the lettering is so damn hard to read. But your friend can do it in one try. He got the easy one.

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try not to step on cracks on the sidewalk

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I'm not a pessimist I'm a realist.

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When driving along in the car, imagining crashing and another car coming into you and the repercussions of it all.

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Normally I can do a specific task no problem but when someone is watching and I know that they are watching I screw up.

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I flick my boogers on the carpet knowing that I can just vacuum them up later.

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Waste time looking all over for something and notice it is right where it should be.

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wen on this website go look at the most disliked

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Try to give my download speed moral support: "You can do it! YES, just stay there!" For anyone out there struggling with slow internet.. I feel your pain

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speak proper english

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~When you turn around, somebody is already looking at you; something is probably on your face. (I know they look at you because you would look at anybody turning around, but I just hate it)

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Read this site's posts, think of something awesome to write but then forget it because you decided to read more and finish the page rather than write it immediately.

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while i'm doing something,i think a suitable soundtrack for it.

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put the volume on the TV as an even number, and feeling uncomfortable if it's on an odd number

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I am Moral Man your friendly r*pist neighboorhood, what only I can do? I can steal, cheat, kill r*pe boys and girls, cats, not mouse heck I am no pervert either see? All this and I can still be... ...A SMOOTH CRIMINAL! AH! YAHOOW!

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Consume skin around finger nails. Cuticle too.

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Worry a lot about the efficiency of your path when walking.

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Wave my hand at automatic doors just as they open pretending that I have Jedi powers

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When i'm in the front passenger seat, I still move my foot like im the one driving...

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.