Check the lint filter on the dryer every time I walk into the laundry room.

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Spend countless hours looking at cars online I know I'll never be able to afford

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I feel strange when I look at someone and think ''This person has had sex''

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Play with my own boobs for no reason

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This song will not come out of my head!

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When I Was Little I Always Slept On My Stomach Even If I Wasn't Comfortable Because I Thought It Would Be Harder For Aliens To Abduct Me.

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Before drinking the actual soft drink, I drink the fizz as fast as I can.

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Pronounce hors d'oeuvres 'whores-dev-ers' thinking I'm so witty.

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when im alone and in a bad mood i make stupid faces with my eyes closed and try and figure out how stupid i looked. then i start laughing hysterically because i think that im an idiot. then i repeat this process until i have to pee from laughing so hard because im already in the bathroom so why not utilize the toilet, rather than waiting for a commercial and speed-peeing because im scared that i missed some of the show i was watching :D -Grace-

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Moisturize "down there" after a really drying wipe session.

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Sittig on a table donating sperm to my friend gabe

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Thinking you could bump into someone by the corner of a building (or a wall)

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Vote for the other guy

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Likes that girggle sound you make after a burp.

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Watch scary movies even though your afraid of the dark.

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I used to be the third most useless invention in the world, and now I am so sad, I mean I lost to a square wheel! Moral: On the bright side, ill never be as useless as Rustin Beaver.

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When I'm riding passenger in a car, things I'm driving past will be a part of my imaginary drum kit. When a car passes in the opposite direction, I'll tap my right foot as the bass drum, a drain hole along the gutter is my left hand snare, and the street signs and lights are the hi-hats in my right hand.

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Walk away in the middle of a sitcom and then play the rest out of the episode in your head while doing something else.

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At school I go along with the norm even though inside I HATE it!!!!

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Read this site's posts, think of something awesome to write but then forget it because you decided to read more and finish the page rather than write it immediately.

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It takes half as long to take a dump if I forget my phone.

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I am Moral Man your friendly r*pist neighboorhood, what only I can do? I can steal, cheat, kill r*pe boys and girls, cats, not mouse heck I am no pervert either see? All this and I can still be... ...A SMOOTH CRIMINAL! AH! YAHOOW!

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Worry a lot about the efficiency of your path when walking.

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Eat a biscuit realise how nice it is and eat the whole packet

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.