Still sitting on the toilet 20 minutes after you're done crapping... you're not alone.. -Professor.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

I sleep naked cauz It's dead sexy.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Hate people who don't dress like you because they're not fashionable. Hate people who do dress like you because they threaten your individuality.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

I rate certain songs on my iPod higher than others because if someone else is checking out my playlists, I don't want them knowing how much I really love that super cheesy song from the early 90's (even though every time it comes on, I hit repeat at least 3 times and sing aloud as loudly as I think I can get away with. I really, really love that song!).

thumb_up thumb_down +8

When I hear footsteps approaching while I'm sitting on the toilet, I'm getting ready to jump at the door in case I actually forgot to lock it.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

when someone asks you to not listen to they conversation and your listening to music at the same time, in the same room and when they have that conversation, you pretend to listen to your music.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Laugh when something happens to someone, but when the exact same happens to you, you say "Its not funny"

thumb_up thumb_down +6

look for old friends on facebook to see what they are up to now

thumb_up thumb_down

When I get in the car I look in the backseat for monsters or psychopathic killers and as I am turning to check I say out loud 'Oh, maybe my book is in the backseat, let me check' so the monster or killer doesn't know I'm really looking back there for them. That way they might not kill me.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Poop naked.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

I use my mobile as a torch and keep hitting random buttons to keep it alight.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Having gay sex

thumb_up thumb_down -10

i absolutely hate the number nine, and when i told my brother this i was like "sometimes i wish i could delete the number 9" and hes like "but then youd have 9 numbers" and i was like..... "FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU"

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Pretend the legs of a chair are the barrels of a mini gun while moving them.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Listening to my iPod with other people walking by me or sitting near me and feeling mysterious and cool.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Blow on your ice cream for no apparent reason before you eat it.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

When I was younger I used to challenge myself with touching the roof I would first jump and see if I could touch it then I would try and see how long I can touch it and now every once in a while I just touch it and think of how far I have come.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Cover up the webcam on my laptop because I think someone might be watching me through it.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

do things without turning the lights on and feel like a ninja.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

When I take a shower, I screw with my iPod for a half an hour "Waiting for the water to warm up".

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Constantly looking up at a Facebook tab while on another tab to see if you have any notifications or messages.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

When I’ve got something cooking in the microwave, before actually looking to see how much time is left, I try to guess how much time is left; if I’m correct within 3 seconds on the timer, I actually feel a measure of accomplishment.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

In the shower i let water run down my hands so it looks like i'm shooting water out of my fingers.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

after switching lights..i go run as hard as i could do after reaching the bed

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.