see if I can hold my breath when walking down a long hallway

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Open the microwave door exactly when your food ends.

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whenever i'm holding a kitchen knife, i feel super weird like i'm gonna stab someone.... its not like i would ever do that, but i think about what would happen if i just impaled the person that is standing near me with a huge knife.

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Take your laptop to the toilet with you, as a modern day equivalent of the newspaper.

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feed a gecko worms every day, not the good worms though...

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When I am in a bind and I know I need help I just say " I gott this" and things work out

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I don't leave the toilet in a public restroom until the other person leaves, so I don't have to make awkward eye contact.

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Worry that I'm will go schizophrenic.

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I sometimes feel someone is watching me and speak towards it in a calming tone, only to again speak to myself telling myself im just being silly... only to turn my head and look behind me just in case.

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I lie in bed and when I get bored I try to convince myself that I'm lying at the other end

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Fart after someone else farts sop that no one will know you did too.

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When climbing onto an escalator, I cannot just step on it and go, I have to mentally prepare myself and time my steps to get on, especially if it's going down, cause I'm terrified I will fall off... I usually end up irritating the people behind me trying to get on, as it takes me almost 10 to 15 seconds to find the right step.. And also, I cannot touch the escalator's sides.

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shit corn, even though i havent recently eaten corn.

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stop the microwave when I hear the food popping

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Click an invisible pen I think is in my hand but is not constantly everyday.

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When I walk past a homeless person asking for change, I avoid looking them in the eye and walk faster.

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place all your achievements in your room to impress your friends

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I combine every item on my plate in all the possible ways, then i eat the worst part of the meal and save the best part til last.

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No ones home. Go to youtube and do karaoke. Can the neighbors here me? Guess im not talking to them ever again...

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Simultaneously apply pressure to my ears to make the surrounding noises sound weird Tristan J.

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I no longer trust any of my local news because they appear to have an agenda

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Getting really ticked off when Wikipedia tells you the ending of a book in the introduction. And the thing is that you don't even see it coming! Ex. My Sister's Keeper is about a family struggling with its own internal problems, especially with the oldest daughter having leukemia and the youngest is the only one who may or may not save her. *name* dies in the end. WTF?

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HAPPY BIRTHDAY GLENDA!!!

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In public,try to make eye contact with most people.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.