If I'm trying to read a clock or bulletin from far away, I instinctively stand and point at it.

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After watching a video of someone doing something tiring, I always feel tired in whichever body part they were using in the video

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When the font allows it, try to hide the cursor in capital I's.

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Taking the time to lick all of the cream off of the inside of an Oreo.

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strt thinking about something spinning, then cant stop no matter how hard you try.

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I can't trill my R's

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I no longer trust any of my local news because they appear to have an agenda

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when riding home on my bike with music on pretenend im in a race with no1 and commentate on iend get really exccited on the last straight especielly when a rocky soundtrack song comes on

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I think my friends are dumb! I love them so much!!

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Try to give my download speed moral support: "You can do it! YES, just stay there!" For anyone out there struggling with slow internet.. I feel your pain

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If its dark and you have to go with rhe stairs i do that running because i tink somebody is behind my

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Realizes there is less toilet paper than first thought. Hobbles across bathroom to find more. Failure. Take shower.

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eat the muffin bottom because it isn't as good as the top and i want to get it over with

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When eating chips I always look at each side before eating it to choose which side will taste better

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Look at the least popular comments just out of interest

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I sometimes feel someone is watching me and speak towards it in a calming tone, only to again speak to myself telling myself im just being silly... only to turn my head and look behind me just in case.

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Try to make a turd that touches the bottom of the toilet before it breaks off.

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Fart after someone else farts sop that no one will know you did too.

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I lie in bed and when I get bored I try to convince myself that I'm lying at the other end

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When I tell human garbage that I am the Fallen Angel, they laugh at me, then I make them spontaneously combust. Moral: What moral whore?

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When home alone, I put cans in front of the door so if someone breaks in, I wake up.

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shit corn, even though i havent recently eaten corn.

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Make a little song with tiny breaths out of your nose

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stop the microwave when I hear the food popping

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.