I eat ass

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When the font allows it, try to hide the cursor in capital I's.

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If I'm trying to read a clock or bulletin from far away, I instinctively stand and point at it.

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sometimes when I'm eating, I eat with the opposite side of my mouth. just to be fair to it.

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Taking the time to lick all of the cream off of the inside of an Oreo.

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Write "my opinion thinking-aloud-sentences" on the "circle the answer" test as footnotes when I'm not sure about the answer.

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Look at just about ANYTHING you see in the context of a zombie apocalypse. Example: strategizing escape routes and barricade points while you're walking down the hallway in school, or looking at something ordinary, like a baseball bat, and thinking, 'I could bash some zombie brains with that'

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Think of something to post but cant put it into words.

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strt thinking about something spinning, then cant stop no matter how hard you try.

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make mini paper airoplanes in boring lessons and pretend you are flying them

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I feel that there is something sinister going on in government

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I kill Solid Snake and masturbate when the Game over screen keeps screaming for my own "snake" "Snake answer me! Snake SNAAAKE!" Me: Answer coming right up and out any moment now! fapfapfap

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I think my friends are dumb! I love them so much!!

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eat curry and don't complain about its spiciness ...if you're not white

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If its dark and you have to go with rhe stairs i do that running because i tink somebody is behind my

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Boy:did it hurt? Me: Did what hurt? Boy:When you fell from heaven. Me: I came frome the pits of hell! Boy: Well then...O__O

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Open the microwave door exactly when your food ends.

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Take your laptop to the toilet with you, as a modern day equivalent of the newspaper.

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I sometimes watch entire movies with the sound off and a good album playing.

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I don't leave the toilet in a public restroom until the other person leaves, so I don't have to make awkward eye contact.

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When I tell human garbage that I am the Fallen Angel, they laugh at me, then I make them spontaneously combust. Moral: What moral whore?

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When home alone, I put cans in front of the door so if someone breaks in, I wake up.

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I always feel like i have to eat something while watching a movie that I've seen so many times.

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When climbing onto an escalator, I cannot just step on it and go, I have to mentally prepare myself and time my steps to get on, especially if it's going down, cause I'm terrified I will fall off... I usually end up irritating the people behind me trying to get on, as it takes me almost 10 to 15 seconds to find the right step.. And also, I cannot touch the escalator's sides.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.