I eat ass

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Having sudden realizations that you are a person who exists.

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Run up all stairs two at a time, and memorize all the staircases with odd number of steps. On those, I start with one step so I can end on a two.

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See how fast and accurate i can use the fast forward on my dvr and applaud myself when i go full speed and stop 2 seconds before the show is back on.

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If I have to put the garbage out at night I sprint back into the house so the monsters don't get me

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When sitting on the pot I whip and then I feel like I have to crap again.

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After brushing my teeth I used to suck the water from it

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I mute music videos and watch them to completely different music.

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Whenever I hear someones name being announced on a p.a., in a store for example....I say out loud 'never heard of him/her'

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I think Lois Griffin on Family Guy is hot!

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When I get the chance, I always nick a chip from my mum's or dad's dinner.

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I feel that there is something sinister going on in government

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I think my friends are dumb! I love them so much!!

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Skip lines to read faster then get confused by everything for the next 10 pages.

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scratch that bit between my balls and arse when it gets itchy, then carry on scratching for ages cos it feels so damn good

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Sometimes when someone says something to me, I will hear them perfectly clear, but I will instinctively say "what?"

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Laying alone in bed at night and then every single scary thought, face, image, movie, or whatever starts playing in your mind.

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Checking out peoples cars to try and figure out what kind of driver they are.

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not be afraid of hurricane sandy

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I feel like my blanket is an indestructible shield against any monsters that might try to get me at night. If any part of you is out of the covers, you're screwed. lol -ML

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I sometimes want to eat spaghetti with my hands, but for whatever reason have never done it...

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I lie in bed and when I get bored I try to convince myself that I'm lying at the other end

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when sleeping over at someone's house, make a cringing, weird looking face while opening the fridge in the middle of the night like somehow the look on your face will change the volume of the seal breaking open

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When climbing onto an escalator, I cannot just step on it and go, I have to mentally prepare myself and time my steps to get on, especially if it's going down, cause I'm terrified I will fall off... I usually end up irritating the people behind me trying to get on, as it takes me almost 10 to 15 seconds to find the right step.. And also, I cannot touch the escalator's sides.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.