Thinking your life is a movie...

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When something weird happens I nod in agreement.

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In public,try to make eye contact with most people.

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I Never read the Terms of Service but click the box anyway .

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Am I not the one who created an imaginary BAE?

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I have to look at myself in multiple mirrors before I leave my apartment. Sometimes if I'm alone, I'll walk back and forth between 2 or 3 mirrors about 25 times before I'm content to leave.

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scratch that bit between my balls and arse when it gets itchy, then carry on scratching for ages cos it feels so damn good

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Wonder if life is just a dream then get a creepy feeling and immediately think happier thoughts.

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In elementary school whenever it was supposed to be mental math I never did it mentally.

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I use encryption even for everyday, routine communications because fuck the NSA.

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Check behind the shower curtain for a killer.

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wait up to 14 days just to find the opportunity to use one, really good, joke.

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Pretend to cough in class so other people could pretend to cough

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Feeling sorry for inanimate objects

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Say "what?" when you know what they said, then answer before they can respond. I do it because it takes me a second to figure out what they said and so my immediate response it "what?".

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make those little rectangles with your mouse on the computer get so close that they are together and you cant see them and try to move to the left or right, keeping the lines together so you cant see them.

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Being able to scare people by awkwardly standing behind them

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I refuse to imagine good things happening to me, because if I did, it won't come true and I end up being suck at everything.

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When I'm alone I occasionally like to give a little hump to the air. Not for sexual reasons or anything, just because it feels right.

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I brush my teeth in the shower and use the shower for a waterpik.

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When I play Sims, I feel like God and wonder if we, in fact, are just the players in God's Sims game. Hmmmm...

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Wanting to be the Walmart baby model as a kid ^_^

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stop the microwave when I hear the food popping

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When riding in a car I pump my arms to pretend I'm running at an incredible rate.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.