Smell a fart and don't react until someone else does.

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Remove all the stupid gobbldegook words that the captchas from this site add to my predictive text.

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Get excited when your friends think your favorite song is cool.

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Every time i find an insect in my basement i grab it put it in the toilet and pee on it victoriously while its being flushed down. But Im a nice guy, and i worry about this evil hatred i have towards insects.

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When a person tells you: Oh you like Lana Del Rey? Me:No,I like the wall

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I masturbate with sandpaper

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Scratch my scalp and look around the place if there is someone watching me (if no one does) quickly smell my fingers

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pull out a flies wings and let it go

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It is really difficult for me to lose control of myself

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I try really hard to come up with a funny joke on antijokes.com, then I give up and come to this website instead.

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Lay down in bed and close my eyes and pretend that the bed is slowly levitating towards the ceiling. When I open my eyes, the bed is back on the ground.

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Am I not the one who created an imaginary BAE?

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When I go to the shops I like to park my car next to a specific coloured car so I can find it afterwards.

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When I fap at friends house, I use mobile data instead of his wifi incase history can be seen

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Think your teacher is super hot and have a hard time concentrating in class . . . for the whole year.

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Everytime I have ear buds in and I hear myself breathing, I think others can hear it too so I slow my breathing or hold my breath.

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when you're microwaving something and you have to pee, you run to the bathroom. then you run back to see if there is still time left before the "bomb" goes off.

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say "ow" when your character in a video game gets hurt

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How is it that celebrities no one likes keep popping up on shows everyone likes

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when i piss in the toilet, i flush half way through and race the toilet to the finish.

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Consume skin around finger nails. Cuticle too.

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Start thinking about my blinking and feel that I am blinking weird

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Go to the same website two days in a row and then never again after that

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Whenever I have to carry a heavy box with both hands a long distance, my nose decides it's going to itchy.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.