Walk next to someone so you don't look too lonely.

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At times I get the annoying habbit of counting the notes on a song on my fingers, again and again until it ends with five, if not, I keep doing it until it does so as to not leave a finger left out of the melody.

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recycle the peanuts in my poop to make organic peanut butter

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I really enjoy spending my birthday alone. I never told anyone that.

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When in a public bathroom and others are in there, pretend to fix your clothes/hair until everyone has left before you use it.

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Set multiple alarms to wake me up in the morning so I dont just turn it off and fall back asleep

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moving your hand with objects that are already moving and pretending you have the force.

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Swirling your hair through your hair while something is loading.

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Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie)

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Think about the same confusing random dilemas that dont involve me every week and alwaus come to the same conclusion

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I sit sideways on the toilet because my bony butt fits better that way.

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When I'm walking along and just trip over my own foot I look back and pretend to look at whatever it was I tripped over.

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flushing the toilet eventho not yet finish pee-ing. So that the water sucks it right after the last drop of your pee. Saves 2-3seconds of your life.

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It's hot but I still have on covers

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Every time i find an insect in my basement i grab it put it in the toilet and pee on it victoriously while its being flushed down. But Im a nice guy, and i worry about this evil hatred i have towards insects.

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Miss the bus, keep running pretending I was going somewhere else.

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I am always SO sure the metal detector or store alarms will go off when I walk through them. –Ikka

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Brake for tail-gaters

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wonder who wrote these things

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Lay down in bed and close my eyes and pretend that the bed is slowly levitating towards the ceiling. When I open my eyes, the bed is back on the ground.

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When I Was Little I Always Slept On My Stomach Even If I Wasn't Comfortable Because I Thought It Would Be Harder For Aliens To Abduct Me.

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when looking at a reflection of myself, i try to do it as fast as i can before the reflection does something i didnt

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Whenever I'm in the shower, I never close my eyes because I think someones gonna kill me

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speak proper english

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.