Boinked my neighbor

When driving along in the car, imagining crashing and another car coming into you and the repercussions of it all.

When a stripper sucks you so hard that the tip of your penis gets circumcised

Doing a little dance after having sex because your so proud you're a FATHER!!! - Uncle Jerrett

Click my teeth from side to side at the beat of songs

When I make croissants from the Pillsbury can, I'll take one of the little triangles and eat it, because I like the consistency of dough, and i like the fizzy feeling of the yeast on my tongue.

Watching movies about couples with age gaps and woundering how it would feel like to be with somebody much older (or younger) than you. Would they use viagra or would you not even try to have sex with someone so old and delicate?

if im somewhere and say i get a itchy ass,i would say to a friend whilst sctatching " i have the itchyist but whole in the world right now" jokingly. but then think to myself, i wonder if there is someone in the world right now at the same time as me who has actually got a itchyer butt lol

You pretend to fight imaginary people while no ones looking:/ But you look like the star wars kid...

When it is raining and a sad song comes on the radio, I look out the window and pretend I am in a movie. -Cocobear

How is it that celebrities no one likes keep popping up on shows everyone likes

Thinking of a song to get an annoying one out of your head, then realizing that one's even worse.

I pee in the shower. :3

Whenever I'm chewing on gum that has lost its flavor, I extract the gum from my mouth using my fingers before putting it back in so the flavor would return.

The girl I like has just managed to transfer her consciousness into my mind, now being to hear my every thought and see everything I do. Just. Act. Cool.

think about how different my life would be I if I didn't get married

When I take a shower, I screw with my iPod for a half an hour "Waiting for the water to warm up".

Look at my poop before flushing

When I'm in the shower I act like I'm filming a music video.

THINK OF SOMETHING WEIRD YOU DO TO PUT ON THIS WEBSITE ONLY TO END UP FORGETTING IT BEFORE YOU GET ON THE COMPUTER

If I have a top comment and I see someone else does, I upvote both of ours; friendly competition.

My dreams are almost always bizarre in some way - the only time they're ever normal is when they're the premonition type, and then they're about completely uneventful things but accurate down to the tiniest detail.

Pass wind after i ate lasagna.

When I'm laying in bed and I feel my heartbeat, I turn around so I can't feel it because it makes me feel sick.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.