Consume skin around finger nails. Cuticle too.

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It takes half as long to take a dump if I forget my phone.

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When I am in class or somewhere boring I start getting thoughts of weird senerios like a group of zombies swamping the place or being hit by an earthquake etc and being one of the surivors. But then i realise that the possibility of that happening is incredibly slim and get depressed. Bananas!

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when i pass a grave yard, i am compelled to hold my breath

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Check the shower before you pee to make sure nothing is waiting there to literally get you with your pants down.

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I'm a female. Sometimes I pee in the shower just so that I can try to aim my pee at the drain. This way I can imagine what it's like to pee with a doodle.

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I save my files as "askjaskjaks" because I'm too lazy to give them a proper name.

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play my ipod all night till my eyes hurt

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take 2 coffes in 2 seconds cause dont remember the first coffee! o.O

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Sometimes I won't do something just to see how long it takes before someone else does it (dishes, throw something away, fill the ice cube tray, etc.).

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I don't like to answer the phone because it is never for me.

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When I'm in the shower I act like I'm filming a music video.

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I used to drive home from my girlfriend's house late at night and stop on a stretch of road to take a leak. I'd walk backwards while peeing, creating a crooked line of pee in the road. I'd add to it night after night, then I'd drive by in the day to see my long pee stain in the road only I knew about. Anyone who passed by could see it, but only I knew what it was. It would last until the next rain and I'd have to start over.

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Hum up and down in pitch because it makes LED displays dance around.

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pick nose in car and realize people can see you when stopped at a red light

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When the vacuum cleaner's going, I try to stay as far away from it and block the noise by shutting doors.

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When your alone in the house you walk around naked even though there is no point

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Tally mark everytime I take a shit.

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play on your game for ten minutes before you realise why you stoppedd the last time

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When i close the refrigiator door, i re-open it and give it a good shove to make sure it tight.

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I always find myself criticizing some commercials on television like the first time I see them I think nothing of it but the third or fourth time I think hey wait a second...

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Pretend my life is a videogame.

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google search random thoughts you have to see if they pop up.

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Fantasize about taking over the world, and killing all religious people.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.