When I’ve got something cooking in the microwave, before actually looking to see how much time is left, I try to guess how much time is left; if I’m correct within 3 seconds on the timer, I actually feel a measure of accomplishment.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Sometimes, I have a hard time looking people I know in the eyes but have no trouble looking strangers in the eyes. I wish I knew why. Help!

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Swirling your hair through your hair while something is loading.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Watching a movie with bugs in it and instantly feeling that shivery 'holy sh*t there are bugs on me' feeling.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

If I have a top comment and I see someone else does, I upvote both of ours; friendly competition.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

talking on the phone with somebody and then spending 10 minutes or so looking for your phone...

thumb_up thumb_down -33

I tell inanimate objects what to do.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Find that the kettle has recently been used and still contains hot water so decide to have a cup of tea just so that boiling that water wasn't a waste. Think that it might have cooled down by now. Reboil the water.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

I'm ridiculously turned on by the scent nail polish.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Drool a lil bit and continue eating...

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Being able to scare people by awkwardly standing behind them

thumb_up thumb_down -37

You like to think about how your favorite characters would react if you told them that they were fictional.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

If I'm trying to read a clock or bulletin from far away, I instinctively stand and point at it.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

It's hot but I still have on covers

thumb_up thumb_down -41

I hump my bed at night and pretend it's a hot model

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Saying something stupid and then claiming it was an inside joke so you don't look stupid.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

Pee while setting down even if your a dude.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

only feel the need to click one of the related sites that draws you after youve clicked 'next page'

thumb_up thumb_down -43

I masturbate with sandpaper

thumb_up thumb_down -47

Vote for the other guy

thumb_up thumb_down -51

really wonder why there is so much talk about pooping and farting on this site

thumb_up thumb_down -55

Trying not to fart when laughing is challenging.

thumb_up thumb_down -57

Take advantage of loud traffic to fart really hard.

thumb_up thumb_down -67

When a stripper sucks you so hard that the tip of your penis gets circumcised

thumb_up thumb_down -73

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.