when i pass a grave yard, i am compelled to hold my breath

Stepping on a concrete sidewalk square the exact amount of times as the others.

I like to watch online videos of people and pause the video mid sentence to see the faces they make frozen mid speech

When I dry my hair after showering I put a towel on my head and look at the mirror pretending I am a mighty naked sheik.

When I’ve got something cooking in the microwave, before actually looking to see how much time is left, I try to guess how much time is left; if I’m correct within 3 seconds on the timer, I actually feel a measure of accomplishment.

Set multiple alarms to wake me up in the morning so I dont just turn it off and fall back asleep

moving your hand with objects that are already moving and pretending you have the force.

check for spiders under the toilet seat before taking a dump

When I drive I cut corners even at low speeds so that the people behind me think I am experienced race car driver.

When listening to headphones, I automatically start lip syncing the lyrics... But stop doing it when people look at me funny..

Talks to yourself in your head then replies to yourself out loud nikki

Playing with a tiny piece of loose skin in the middle of my upper lip.

when you are you a self flushing urinal/toilet you think it is a tiny camera and think someone is watching you so you rush to finish using the bathroom

When I play Sims, I feel like God and wonder if we, in fact, are just the players in God's Sims game. Hmmmm...

play on your game for ten minutes before you realise why you stoppedd the last time

Wish that Mexicans would go to their OWN country and stop living tax free in OURS.

Being able to scare people by awkwardly standing behind them

flushing the toilet eventho not yet finish pee-ing. So that the water sucks it right after the last drop of your pee. Saves 2-3seconds of your life.

When a person tells you: Oh you like Lana Del Rey? Me:No,I like the wall

When I walk past a homeless person asking for change, I avoid looking them in the eye and walk faster.

Pretend my life is a videogame.

When something says "I have read and agree to the terms of service" I quickly skim through it nd act like I read it.

Sometimes cringe at the sound when other people scratch themselves

Ever played the sims, then wondered if you were just apart of a game and that maybe someone is controlling YOUR every move? Yeah. Me too.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.