When I wipe after taking a poo I always get excited when there is no extra poo to be wiped off...yea...don't judge

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Boring car ride? Read every food & drinks rapper you can find .

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My dreams are almost always bizarre in some way - the only time they're ever normal is when they're the premonition type, and then they're about completely uneventful things but accurate down to the tiniest detail.

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I hate being called "buddy".

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think up the funniest jokes right before i go to sleep and cant think of them the next day

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being super bored at shool

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Say 'she's not here' when someone that I don't know calls and asks for me.

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whenever someone pulls up beside you in another car, you are fully aware of them, but never look at them, your too cool to care what they look like.

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when looking at a reflection of myself, i try to do it as fast as i can before the reflection does something i didnt

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When I get bored of sex and p*rn, I download animal "mating" stuff for variation.

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Buy tons of movies and only watch them once. Rarely buy books and reread them a million times.

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I like to turn the lights off in the bathroom, actually block every little bit of light I possibly can, then take a nice warm shower, curl up on the floor, block my ears and enjoy the warm water and sensory deprivation.

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Showering with my uncle Jarrett <3

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when riding home on my bike with music on pretenend im in a race with no1 and commentate on iend get really exccited on the last straight especielly when a rocky soundtrack song comes on

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When I'm in the shower, I'm afraid something might try to kill me so I shower with my glasses on.

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Pretending not to hear someone talk to you hoping they wont care enough to repeat themselves so you wont have to talk to them

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Skip lines to read faster then get confused by everything for the next 10 pages.

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Put toilet paper on the seat in my own house.

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Pick your dead skin then eat it.

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Wipe my hands on a cold glass to clean my hands

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When I get "interactive" commercials on my laptop screen, I like to "just shoot 4 out of 5 ducks" and feel like I have cheated the system.

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How is it that celebrities no one likes keep popping up on shows everyone likes

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Fantasize about shooting one of those trucks that have some sort of liquid in them and watching them blow up.

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When does eating pop corn, take apart the bag and lick all the extra butter.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.