It takes half as long to take a dump if I forget my phone.

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worry about other people hearing you pee when your in the bathroom.

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When you are speaking to someone with a distinct accent and suddenly take on the accent as your own when responding. - Missy Chemick

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When I am in class or somewhere boring I start getting thoughts of weird senerios like a group of zombies swamping the place or being hit by an earthquake etc and being one of the surivors. But then i realise that the possibility of that happening is incredibly slim and get depressed. Bananas!

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I wonder what would happen if time froze and only I could move. I think about all the things I could do.

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I save my files as "askjaskjaks" because I'm too lazy to give them a proper name.

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play my ipod all night till my eyes hurt

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Feel uncomfortable with the TV volume on an odd number

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Swirling your hair through your hair while something is loading.

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Pour the cheap shampoo I can only afford these days into the empty expensive bottle to trick myself I'm still using the good stuff.

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check shower for murder then pee

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I play video games with the controller under the covers.

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I hump my bed at night and pretend it's a hot model

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If I'm trying to read a clock or bulletin from far away, I instinctively stand and point at it.

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Wish that Mexicans would go to their OWN country and stop living tax free in OURS.

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only feel the need to click one of the related sites that draws you after youve clicked 'next page'

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Every time I see people's bare feet I'm automatically counting their toes to make sure if they have an extra toe or two.

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Say ow when I bang something I'm caring into something, even though I didn't get hurt at all. -B

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When your at your friends house and they run out of toilet paper, so you sit there like "what do i do now?"

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Simultaneously apply pressure to my ears to make the surrounding noises sound weird Tristan J.

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Smile like an idiot while reading this site.

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Sometimes I would just be thinking to myself and then think of something funny and laugh but I don't share it with anyone else makes me look insane.

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Boinked my neighbor

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I practice my signature on a piece of paper over and over again. Even though my signature has never changed.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.