Being able to scare people by awkwardly standing behind them

Drool a lil bit and continue eating...

If I'm trying to read a clock or bulletin from far away, I instinctively stand and point at it.

You like to think about how your favorite characters would react if you told them that they were fictional.

Saying something stupid and then claiming it was an inside joke so you don't look stupid.

Pee while setting down even if your a dude.

I masturbate with sandpaper

Say ow when I bang something I'm caring into something, even though I didn't get hurt at all. -B

Vote for the other guy

Trying not to fart when laughing is challenging.

Whenever I'm in the shower, I never close my eyes because I think someones gonna kill me

daydream/pretend i'm in a story. pretend to be a new person in a movie where all the cool main characters are my friends, add to the movie with my own story and add twists and make it my own.

I hate when people say for example,if something is $3.99 they say its four dollars.

Take advantage of loud traffic to fart really hard.

When a stripper sucks you so hard that the tip of your penis gets circumcised

Roll my eyes with them closed when I am annoyed with someone

I used to be the third most useless invention in the world, and now I am so sad, I mean I lost to a square wheel! Moral: On the bright side, ill never be as useless as Rustin Beaver.

Having the tv on always, just for background noise. Doesn't work with a computer/laptop, must be the tv.

clean my ears with finger if they feel dirty...eat it.

It takes half as long to take a dump if I forget my phone.

After eating a banana I leave the last bit that was in the bottom

Eat a biscuit realise how nice it is and eat the whole packet

When I am in class or somewhere boring I start getting thoughts of weird senerios like a group of zombies swamping the place or being hit by an earthquake etc and being one of the surivors. But then i realise that the possibility of that happening is incredibly slim and get depressed. Bananas!

Wash my hands after i use the toilet.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.