You try to tell a joke to impress everyone and then you mess it up.

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I don't like to answer the phone because it is never for me.

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I really enjoy spending my birthday alone. I never told anyone that.

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Look at my poop before flushing

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When home alone, I put cans in front of the door so if someone breaks in, I wake up.

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pick nose in car and realize people can see you when stopped at a red light

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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I choose not to post a comment on some subjects because I know there will be a hundred others that will be the same.

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Fall down the stairs, bounce on your ass to the bottom, feel scared, then want to DO IT AGAIN! Get pwned at a game, rage, look at your cat sitting beside you, looking back, and say "What?"

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If I'm alone, I'll imagine myself as somebody else an start acting as if I'm in a different life, complete with different people and places because in my imagination, I get to control what is going to happen next. Because, my imagination is way better than my reality.

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When you can't hear your friend, but you nodd your head and snicker, hoping it was a joke

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After a meal if I need to use a toothpick I would eat the piece of food I "picked".

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When I walk past a homeless person asking for change, I avoid looking them in the eye and walk faster.

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Use reverse psychology on the rain to make it slow down or speed up.

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I rub the ends of my hair because it feels awesome.

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Whilst passing a mega dump or room clearer as my brother calls them I come up with songs...sometimes in spanish

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Don't make a sound when sitting in the stall and someone walks in; and in turn, don't say anything to the person in the stall even if you know who it is!

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I hate when people say for example,if something is $3.99 they say its four dollars.

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When serving grilled steak, I always make sure I get the best one.

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when playing games like grand theft auto I drive normally like all the other people in the game when i'm bored

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Sick the top of you fingers in your pants when you are doing something that requires one hand, like watching t.v

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I chew around the center of carrots.

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I have the background on my computer a picture of some cartoon characters,and when I'm alone I talk to the screen like those characters are actually in the room. -Briarwoodninja

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Always run up the stairs as if someone was chasing you.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.