- Things You Think Only You Do

Always check the other side of the shower curtain when showering out of fear that someone is on the other side

Blow on your ice cream for no apparent reason before you eat it.

After peeling an apple, I will put the apple in a zip-lock and hold it through the plastic so my hands won't get sticky while I eat it.

When home alone, I put cans in front of the door so if someone breaks in, I wake up.

Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie)

check shower for murder then pee

Tally mark everytime I take a shit.

Sometimes I won't do something just to see how long it takes before someone else does it (dishes, throw something away, fill the ice cube tray, etc.).

Think about having sex with the dog. You wouldn't, but what if you did?

I sit sideways on the toilet because my bony butt fits better that way.

A lot of times I'll make up reasons for why different things happen even though I really have absolutely no idea.

When i close the refrigiator door, i re-open it and give it a good shove to make sure it tight.

Scratch my asshole and always judge it to be okay to continue my day, no matter how bad the smell.

I make weird crazy faces at myself in the mirror whenever I leave the bathroom.

fart and talk thinking it will cover the smell

When I was younger I used to think that Red bull was a drink that really did give you wings like they show in the commercials

When your at your friends house and they run out of toilet paper, so you sit there like "what do i do now?"

smile when you find out that the things you only do is right.

See how fast and accurate i can use the fast forward on my dvr and applaud myself when i go full speed and stop 2 seconds before the show is back on.

Pretend animals talk to you!

Think that If I leave a big knife out on the counter- or a pair of tights/belt/scarf out in view, I believe that ultimately someone will break in and kill me via the aforementioned items.................and I will only have myself to blame.

Sick the top of you fingers in your pants when you are doing something that requires one hand, like watching t.v

Dilikes the Gangnam Style.

When someone starts waving and saying hi then I start waving and saying hi even though I have no idea who it is only to realize they are actually waving at someone behind me.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.