I pee in the shower. :3

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The girl I like has just managed to transfer her consciousness into my mind, now being to hear my every thought and see everything I do. Just. Act. Cool.

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I like to watch online videos of people and pause the video mid sentence to see the faces they make frozen mid speech

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I wonder do females have morning wood equivalent?

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Swirling your hair through your hair while something is loading.

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Always check the other side of the shower curtain when showering out of fear that someone is on the other side

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My dreams are almost always bizarre in some way - the only time they're ever normal is when they're the premonition type, and then they're about completely uneventful things but accurate down to the tiniest detail.

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Being able to scare people by awkwardly standing behind them

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Pretend my life is a videogame.

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Use reverse psychology on the rain to make it slow down or speed up.

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See how fast and accurate i can use the fast forward on my dvr and applaud myself when i go full speed and stop 2 seconds before the show is back on.

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When I was younger I used to think that Red bull was a drink that really did give you wings like they show in the commercials

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Sitting on the toilet and feel devastated I forgot my smartphone and then spending the rest of my time on the toilet thinking about how boring it is without my smartphone.

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Don't make a sound when sitting in the stall and someone walks in; and in turn, don't say anything to the person in the stall even if you know who it is!

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when you read a post that you don't do then start doing it

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collect kleenex boxes for the cool designs

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Normally I can do a specific task no problem but when someone is watching and I know that they are watching I screw up.

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When a stripper sucks you so hard that the tip of your penis gets circumcised

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Pretend animals talk to you!

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Walk away in the middle of a sitcom and then play the rest out of the episode in your head while doing something else.

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I think of doing something productive, but can't work up the motivation and end up on the internet instead.

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When someone starts waving and saying hi then I start waving and saying hi even though I have no idea who it is only to realize they are actually waving at someone behind me.

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Consume skin around finger nails. Cuticle too.

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Start thinking about my blinking and feel that I am blinking weird

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.