Find that the kettle has recently been used and still contains hot water so decide to have a cup of tea just so that boiling that water wasn't a waste. Think that it might have cooled down by now. Reboil the water.

Every time I see people's bare feet I'm automatically counting their toes to make sure if they have an extra toe or two.

When I walk past a homeless person asking for change, I avoid looking them in the eye and walk faster.

smile when you find out that the things you only do is right.

When your at your friends house and they run out of toilet paper, so you sit there like "what do i do now?"

When I was younger I used to think that Red bull was a drink that really did give you wings like they show in the commercials

See how fast and accurate i can use the fast forward on my dvr and applaud myself when i go full speed and stop 2 seconds before the show is back on.

Think that everything you do is life is being recorded by secret cameras and you're on a reality show. But you don't actually know. The Truman Show. -Robert

Use an entirely different vocabulary in your head than everyday life.

Pretend animals talk to you!

When I am at amusement parks I look and determine which guys I could beat up and which I couldn't.

Think that If I leave a big knife out on the counter- or a pair of tights/belt/scarf out in view, I believe that ultimately someone will break in and kill me via the aforementioned items.................and I will only have myself to blame.

Sick the top of you fingers in your pants when you are doing something that requires one hand, like watching t.v

I chew around the center of carrots.

When someone starts waving and saying hi then I start waving and saying hi even though I have no idea who it is only to realize they are actually waving at someone behind me.

Always run up the stairs as if someone was chasing you.

Consume skin around finger nails. Cuticle too.

I always think I have special powers

worry about other people hearing you pee when your in the bathroom.

Every time I miss a gree light by just a couple seconds, I think to myself, "Maybe if I had made that light an out of control semi would be slamming into my car right at this moment." Thank you red light.

fart then blame it on the guy next to me realizing theres no one near me and everyone looks at me....awkward

when i pass a grave yard, i am compelled to hold my breath

When I’ve got something cooking in the microwave, before actually looking to see how much time is left, I try to guess how much time is left; if I’m correct within 3 seconds on the timer, I actually feel a measure of accomplishment.

There's this reassuring voice in my head. She's almost like a mother, telling me that it'll be alright and that I have things to do.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.